The only time my DD1 becomes irrational

[Cannonball]

Bob, you have to understand that I come from a perspective of a coach who has coached a few decades. I'm a relic in how I expect for players to act. I'm sure your dd is not "entitled." It is hard to fill in the lines on a web site. However, and believe me my dd would verify this, she knew acceptable behaviors and that was that. Thanks for understanding my perspective. A fit around me would result in a bigger fit from the person who holds the power. Have a great day!

 

[canyonjoe]

We could use her on our team. Show up 5 minutes late and you are 15 minutes early.

Seriously I wouldn't worry too much about it. It's not a bad thing to be early. I'm not a big fan of arriving too early however. I hate the phrase if you are 5 minutes early you are late. Everyone's time is valuable. To me if you want to start at 9:00 then everyone needs to be ready to go at 9. If you want to start at 8:55 then say that.

When you are in the workplace if the meeting starts at 10 you don't want to waste 15 minutes waiting for everyone to filter in.

 

[Bob516]

Bob, you have to understand that I come from a perspective of a coach who has coached a few decades. I'm a relic in how I expect for players to act. I'm sure your dd is not "entitled." It is hard to fill in the lines on a web site. However, and believe me my dd would verify this, she knew acceptable behaviors and that was that. Thanks for understanding my perspective. A fit around me would result in a bigger fit from the person who holds the power. Have a great day!

I understand.

 

[Bob516]

We could use her on our team. Show up 5 minutes late and you are 15 minutes early.

Seriously I wouldn't worry too much about it. It's not a bad thing to be early. I'm not a big fan of arriving too early however. I hate the phrase if you are 5 minutes early you are late. Everyone's time is valuable. To me if you want to start at 9:00 then everyone needs to be ready to go at 9. If you want to start at 8:55 then say that.

When you are in the workplace if the meeting starts at 10 you don't want to waste 15 minutes waiting for everyone to filter in.

Wow, 5 minutes late and you are 15 minutes early, that would not fly in my daughters' organization. They spell it out very clearly. If practice begins at 9 you must arrive 10 minutes early if it is outdoors, 5 minutes early if it is indoors. If you are late, for practice or a game, you don't start the next game. Too many lateness and you will be benched for an entire game. They will make exceptions when there is a valid reason, or for those who are chronically early.

I don't worry about her behavior, its just she becomes so irrational and emotional, she drags down everyone's mood. As soon as she gets to the field she is happy and a free-spirit. As I said, irrational.

 

[canyonjoe]

Wow, 5 minutes late and you are 15 minutes early, that would not fly in my daughters' organization. They spell it out very clearly. If practice begins at 9 you must arrive 10 minutes early if it is outdoors, 5 minutes early if it is indoors. If you are late, for practice or a game, you don't start the next game. Too many lateness and you will be benched for an entire game. They will make exceptions when there is a valid reason, or for those who are chronically early.

I don't worry about her behavior, its just she becomes so irrational and emotional, she drags down everyone's mood. As soon as she gets to the field she is happy and a free-spirit. As I said, irrational.

Drives me nuts, but DD is having fun playing so it's tolerable.

 

[Bob516]

Drives me nuts, but DD is having fun playing so it's tolerable.

I have to keep saying that to myself. I am just amazed it only comes up with softball, and only with getting to the field early. In general she is a pretty reasonable kid.

 

[#7sDad]

As other's have mentioned, the Waze app is great. Maybe load it on her (or your) phone. What time does she need to arrive, add a 5 min buffer, plug it into the app and it tells you when to leave. You can even plan it the night before, and it will remind you the next day. On the way there, she can see that she is still arriving at the planned time. This will give her a sense of inclusion and control of the schedule.
The night before, when she is still in her rational state, you can discuss a reasonable time to arrive and then the app is the one to tell you both when you should leave.
Might be worth a try.

 

[Cyder517]

From what you describe, there is definitely some sort of situational anxiety going on here. As someone suggested earlier, best time to discuss this is when she is calm. Be upfront with your concerns--- tell her you admire her desire to be punctual but she is creating unnecessary stress/pressure on herself pregame and on you. The proof that you are never late should reassure her that you got this! Now if she was my daughter....she'd have something to worry about I an always leaving at the last possible minute and are famous for running late. Not a trait that I'm proud of. However btw our new softball team and now volleyball team, I'm learning what it is like to be "early" which for both teams means on time. Good luck! Maybe some deep breathing exercises or meditation will help?


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk