- Jan 24, 2011
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Unfairly? LOL , this stupid thread has gotten me through my day.
playing time on a competitive team
- Thread starter chucky
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i'd say having her sit alone on the bench for 3 or 4 games is unfair.
You are right, kids should have fun. If a kid's fun is playing softball ALL the time, then she probably is on a top level team. If the kid's fun is just hanging out with friends and playing some softball, then rec is more suited. If she is in-between then a lower level TB team would fit.
Honestly my team is registered A, but we are a low A, or a high B, and against my better judgement a kid begged me to let her play with us, and I told her she wouldn't see much playing time. In 2 Tournaments, I think I have played her maybe 2 innings. This kid had never picked up a softball before HS ball. Last night in a scrimmage game she SAC bunted twice for 2 RBI's, and she caught the final out in Right Field. Should have seen her face....
Honestly my team is registered A, but we are a low A, or a high B, and against my better judgement a kid begged me to let her play with us, and I told her she wouldn't see much playing time. In 2 Tournaments, I think I have played her maybe 2 innings. This kid had never picked up a softball before HS ball. Last night in a scrimmage game she SAC bunted twice for 2 RBI's, and she caught the final out in Right Field. Should have seen her face....
So should we quit now? Or play it out? I dont want my daughter crying after every tournament and 'm afraid I might say or do something crazy.
Well said, CoachK. I had 3 DDs...two loved playing serious, high level sports. One didn't. They all did what they wanted, and it was fun as a parent to see them do different, wonderful things. If everyone wanted the same thing out of life, this would be a very boring world.
You and the coach need to talk this out. It isn't that you are a bad person or the coach is a bad person. There was a lack of clear communication. He should have spelled out the expectations at the very beginning before he asked for you to pay a dime. You should have asked more questions. (One recurrent theme on this board is that parents should ask lots and lots of questions before signing up for TB.)
Go the coach and say, "Maybe we got in over our heads here. My DD didn't expect this to consume all of her spare time. If she isn't going to play more, perhaps we should quit." It is possible that the coach will say, "You're right, she should quit." Or, he might say, "We can work something out."
It has to be two *ADULTS* having a conversation about what is best for the child. Try to avoid blame and figure out a solution.
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Just make sure that she isn't feeding off your energy. That all the crying isn't because she feels that she is letting you down. Make sure you are leaving for the right reasons--not just because you are not happy.
- Jun 8, 2011
- 25
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nevermind...sorry
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Well first thing is to set up a meeting with the coach. DO NOT go into this meeting with your emotions hanging on your sleeve. Tell him the situation and ask his advice on how to get more playing time, or would leaving the team be better for all? Be ready, if you quit, I'm sure they have it somewhere that you lose all $ associated with the team.
See, I have 3 parents that believe their kid is the next upcoming star, and honestly, only 1 of those probably have a chance of playing college ball, but he also makes excuses when the kid has a bad day, it's either the umpire wasn't calling strikes, or she is tired, or she is dealing with life issues, ect... Makes me crazy as a coach. Although sometimes I have to take into consideration some of these things, bottom line when you walk the 7-8-9 hitters on 12 straight balls, better bet I'm coming out to talk.
We just asked one of the grils on our U14 travel team to leave because of the complaining that was already starting two tournaments in about being fair and equal playing time. Before the season, we had everyone read the following and we still have families that don't get it If your team had 12 players they would have asked you to leave too:
We are a travel team and not bound by any rules that dictate equal playing time or scheduled substitutions. Traveling fast pitch softball is highly competitive and equal playing time is not guaranteed for the players. However, the coaches will make every effort to play all of the players in every tournament. The coaches will continue to analyze the development of each player to determine positions and playing time. Every player for the (Team name)...... has equal access to all the opportunities that the team provides for our players. What they do with those opportunities is totally left up to each player. We hope all of our players will work hard and make the most of these opportunities. However, playing time and positions are not rights that are given to our players, they are priveleges that are EARNED by our players.
I coach a rec team and there are several girls who will miss practice, games, and this weekend our tournament. It's the way rec is. Some girls play hard and aggressive, while others just are there. Rec is where you do hear alot from the coaches where to be in the field, what to watch out for--bunts!, where to stand in the box, and on and on and on... For you I think it goes back to the soccer season taking precedent over the TB team. I think missing games and practices for soccer and birthday parties started the ball rollin'. not hustling like the coach expects contributes. And yes, I know lots of 12U girls ( and younger ) who take lessons for pitching, catching, and hitting. My DD is one of those girls. I also have invested lots of money in equipment so she and her brother can keep working on their game in the off season. We are always doing something away for the game or practice to keep improving.
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