Lazy kid

[HasBeenorNeverWas]

What does “work at home” look like? Is it just her throwing into a net? Is it you catching and giving instruction?

It took a while for me to figure it out, but I had to learn how to shut up and just do my job (front toss for hitting, specifically) without constantly coaching. Before that, home practice sessions often melted down and were cut short.

She could throw into a net, but doesn't ever do that, or she has a catcher friend who is always ready to come practice anytime. When I catch her I don't do much coaching because I haven't mastered being able to watch her and not get hit with the ball so pretty much just leave the coaching to the pitching coach.

 

[BigSkyHi]

I don't think there is to much structure literally just go through her warm-ups full pitch for a bit then long toss. Not even a long workout usually just trying to get her to put a little bit of time in

Wonder if she would like to help you build one of these?

 

[KrisHur]

I wouldn't pay for lessons if she's not going to practice. I would have her practice at home once a week instead. Lessons only work if the kid practices what was taught, sounds like she just wants to throw but not perfect the craft (just like my DD). If her goal is to play rec or just for HS she probably doesn't need lessons if she knows how to pitch a bit. Depending on the Rec and/or HS team a kid who can just get it over the plate is a valued find. If the rec/HS has good pitching she won't see much of the circle and lessons are a waste of $. JMHO

 

[radness]

Kid says she wants to pitch but won't work at home. Never complains about going to lessons, but never wants to put in extra work aside from that. She did just finish junior high basketball and is getting ready to start volleyball. I feel like on one hand if I take her to lessons she at least throws a couple times a month....on the other hand I think why the hell am I paying for lessons when she won't do what she needs to in order to get better? She's 12, getting ready to turn 13. Doesn't have an at home work ethic for any sport, not basketball, volleyball, or softball. What are your thoughts? Would you continue to fork out $$ for lessons? She has some potential, swears she wants to play, always wants to pitch in games, but doesn't want to work at home for any sport she is doing.

Tough situation.
Money to pay for lessons
(Classroom time)
No application to do homework
(practice on own)

Agree with what others have said regarding whats the atmosphere at home or at the park practicing on her own can make a difference.

*if there is already good atmosphere going on trying to make that practicing happen. And still nada,

Would actually do something like,
~if you want me to pay for lessons then you'll have to step up and do some chores at home.
Yep chores.
Remember good old chores?!
Something that has nothing to do with softball but have to apply time to it.
Adds structure and accountability.

Because that seems the real issue. Figuring out how to apply our time in a quality way to our existence on the planet.

Just my .02 cents

 

[_MIA_]

Would actually do something like,
~if you want me to pay for lessons then you'll have to step up and do some chores at home.
Yep chores.
Remember good old chores?!
Something that has nothing to do with softball but have to apply time to it.
Adds structure and accountability.

Because that seems the real issue. Figuring out how to apply our time in a quality way to our existence on the planet.

Just my .02 cents

This is a good point. If the kid doesn't want to work at home then you cannot force her but as a parent you can make sure their time at home is productive and not just sitting on the phone for 5 hours after school. You also don't want to take away activities that she seemingly enjoys and that are healthy so she has to earn the lesson/TB expenses through either softball work at home or extra chores.

 

[BigSkyHi]

This is a good point. If the kid doesn't want to work at home then you cannot force her but as a parent you can make sure their time at home is productive and not just sitting on the phone for 5 hours after school. You also don't want to take away activities that she seemingly enjoys and that are healthy so she has to earn the lesson/TB expenses through either softball work at home or extra chores.

If my wife sees this, my honey-do list may grow dramatically.

 

[_MIA_]

If my wife sees this, my honey-do list may grow dramatically.

I am not going to ask what you are trying to earn...

 

[_MIA_]

Interesting takes.....I'm not sure it's that but guess anything is possible

Speaking from personal experience it certainly is possible. There was about a month last year where my DD refused to work with me because of my past idiotic behavior. When that happened I told her she could do stuff at home on her own if she wanted to and she did it so it wasn't that she didn't want to work..it was just that she wasn't enjoying doing the work with me (she doesn't take lessons). Of course DD is a positional player so it was easier to do work on her own (tee work, wall ball, etc).

Kids at that age (my DD is 12 too) have a lot going on emotionally, hormonally, socially, etc
Have you asked her why she doesn't enjoy doing some work at home?

 

[RichK]

What is she doing at lessons? Is she learning and working on new things? Or is it basically a $$ throwing session? If she's actively learning at lessons, I'd keep them. Maybe make her pay for them via chores, etc., seeing it as privilege. Another approach that Eric F mentioned is put her on a top A team and see how she sinks/swims and what that means to her in terms of focus.

What is missed a bit in this is she's a three-sport athlete. She's young, but still. If she's a true three-sport stud, such athletes are built different. They can walk into any situation and be one of the best -- with or without practice. That may have something to do with things too. If she's playing three sports it can be tough to train for the off-season ones too. Used to be the best athletes played three seasons of sports, mainly in high school. Obviously that's changed but something to think about...good luck.

 

[schwabach]

Kid says she wants to pitch but won't work at home. Never complains about going to lessons, but never wants to put in extra work aside from that. She did just finish junior high basketball and is getting ready to start volleyball. I feel like on one hand if I take her to lessons she at least throws a couple times a month....on the other hand I think why the hell am I paying for lessons when she won't do what she needs to in order to get better? She's 12, getting ready to turn 13. Doesn't have an at home work ethic for any sport, not basketball, volleyball, or softball. What are your thoughts? Would you continue to fork out $$ for lessons? She has some potential, swears she wants to play, always wants to pitch in games, but doesn't want to work at home for any sport she is doing.

I was in the same situation. My daughter had talent but didn't want to work super hard. The middle school years were not a lot of fun - a lot of me trying to push a piece of string. At the end of 9th grade, she found a club team she really liked - well, they found her - and everything changed. She became much more motivated and I was out of the dugout (bench coach) and into a lounge chair on the outfield fence. It got even better when she got her driver's license and didn't need me to drive her to practice.

I paid for pitching lessons during the years when she wasn't motivated. No regrets.

Edited to add: And she probably wanted a break from me - different levels of intensity.