What would you do? teammate using drugs and drinking

[Amy in AZ.]

Well, I have been there. My close friend tried to tell me this stuff about my son. I didn't believe her. When I found out that it was true, I tried for 2 years, for the other parents (big group of boys and girls) to help cut out the parties. Haha. I might as well saved my breath. Only one other teacher, out of about 12 people tried to help.

When parents are drinking and drugging, too, they don't want bothered by a problem with their own kid. (By the way, the school couldn't do anything, except try to keep drugs out of the lockers.) Many of the kids were on the baseball team, soccer team and one was the president of the Strike Out Drugs club. He graduated and failed his drug test for the National Guard. He is now a teacher.

 

[Cannonball]

When I talk to college coaches I tell exactly what I know to be the truth when asked. Currently, I am trying to help some of my students get college scholarships in sports I don't coach. Still, I know a lot.

Bringing in the other parents is always tricky. For many, if you point out the drug use, they will become angry at you and attack both you and your child as not being perfect yourself. They will wonder if you are going to say anything that will cost their little darling a scholarship. As crazy as it sounds, a lot of parents want to remain ignorant although, imo, they already do know.

Per the coach, I can't say for this coach but when I coached, students told me what was going on. Still do. Many coaches are not as ignorant as they seem. I had one baseball player who refused to stop use of alcohol and drugs. I had a talk with him out of season and told him I considered him a Zebra and they don't change their stripes. I also told him he would get a fair chance during tryouts but to know that I will know whether he has changed. He didn't and he didn't make the team. What a shame, I wish I could share the letter with all of you he wrote me from prison.

 

[Amy in AZ.]

Why are kids stupid enough to post this stuff, in public? Maybe they want help?

 

[BobInMadison]

Why are kids stupid enough to post this stuff, in public? Maybe they want help?

I read an interesting article today. It seems that one of the most effective tools police have in tracking gangs is -- Facebook!

Seriously, there are times when a gang is about to commit some robbery, they post all the info to Facebook, and the cops catch them in the act. Who could've possibly seen THAT coming?

 

[Momo'sDad]

That's a really good question, Amy, but I'm inclined to believe that most are more interested in earning "street cred" amongst their peers than in making a subconscious cry for help. Some might fall into the category you're describing, though.

 

[riseball]

I read an interesting article today. It seems that one of the most effective tools police have in tracking gangs is -- Facebook!

Seriously, there are times when a gang is about to commit some robbery, they post all the info to Facebook, and the cops catch them in the act. Who could've possibly seen THAT coming?

I have friends who are homicide detectives and social media is one of their best tools. Some agencies have staff dedicated to the task. People will commit horrific crimes and go to great lengths to avoid leaving evidence and getting caught. But they cannot seem to resist picking up a cell phone or posting on social media.

 

[Rocketech1]

FYI. Kids nowadays don't use Facebook. It's all about Instagram, snapchat, and Twitter.

 

[guero_gordo]

...Topic reminded me of this from the other day:

 

[Sparky Guy]

It's pretty simple. You share with the college coach YOUR experience with the player when you have been coaching her such as she is a great fielder, good teammate, takes instruction well, clutch at the plate with runners in scoring position, etc. You shouldn't be discussing things with college coaches that could be heresy and rumors for all anyone knows.

It works differently with college coaches. The college coach is taking a big gamble with every player they take on the team. More often than not it's something off of the field that leads to players being released from teams. If a JO coach sends too many kids to college who are not prepared both on and off of the field their reputation will become greatly diminished hurting future players. So, if you are running a showcase team, as a coach, you need to know to the best of your abilities the players you recommend to a college coach will make it in college. There is a need to know when it comes to possible issues that can derail a player.

The JO coach does not have to share details with a college coach, but they can hesitate recommending a player if they are not sure about her. I know in college the DD's monitored all of their social media accounts for anything that was against team, school and NCAA rules.

A girl my DD played with lost a full ride softball scholarship to a very highly regarded academic school because she got tangled up with drugs. Others I know have failed academically. Another couldn't take being away from her family. Another gave up a scholarship because of a boyfriend.

Of the 7 freshmen in my DD college class only her and another girl were there after 4 years. 1 girl transferred and the others were gone due to off-field issues.

 

[Jquick823]

Because its your dd and her mess so you help clean. You dont go over to somebody else's house, accuse their child of making a mess, and look for it to clean when there may be no
mess.
The problem with this world is too many people like to mind others peoples business under
the mask of caring and feel they are entitled to do what they want without thinking first about
what their actions might cause.

Only my opinion though

Completely understand your side of it and based on several factors you choose your way. Based on different factors I choose my way. Neither way is right unless the kid turns out for the better.