What makes a good softball parent?

[InTheCrowd]

At the risk of staring an avalanche, what qualities make a good softball parent? Yes, seriously. I read all the time on different boards about what makes parents bad. But what makes a parent an asset to a team rather than a liability.

My DD is on a travel team, we have a great group of kids, a wonderful coach, and a supportive group of parents. Every thing combined seems to make a better team.

 

[starsnuffer]

I would say a good softball parent has the same qualities as a good parent.

A parent who raises their child to be thoughtful (listen, think, analyze, act), respectful (of self, peers, and teachers/coach/parents), punctual, responsible, and willing to rise to a challenge is perfect in my book.

The problem parents are the ones who raise their children with a sense of entitlement (rewards for participation, assuming privilege, ect), disrespect of others, and not responsible for their own actions (overprotective parent).

No parent is perfect, including myself, but I think those are the qualities good parents are mindful of, both on the good side and bad side, and when confronted with the choice, the better parents choose the good qualities the majority of the time.

-W

 

[FPMark]

Good parents are fans of the team, not only their child. They cheer for everyone when they do good, and encourage anyone when they have a bad game. They are always positive and motivating, to the girls, and to the coaches. They support the coaches, even when they do things they don't agree with. They tell their daughter to play wherever and when ever the coach needs them. If their DD complains about the coach, they listen, find out why, and give advise on how they would handle the situation, instead of agreeing with them that the coach is a moron and doesn't know what he is doing.

If softball parents were good parents as described by starsnuffer, then these things would come natural to them.

 

[sluggers]

Parents who teach how to make to decisions and then allow the child to make decisions.

 

[absdad]

Excellent responses... I'd just add that parents who help out with the team, running drills in practice, helping with fundraisers, cleaning helmets, just pitching in. Nothing is better than when all the parents in the stands cheer on every girl on the team. It's group success or fail.

 

[InTheCrowd]

Interesting, a different board gave the distinct impression that parents "should be seen and not heard". That we parents are a necessary evil just to provide the player.

 

[sluggers]

InTheCrowd: As the level of play increases, parents have less responsibilities. At college level, parents show up, watch the game, talk to the other parents and go home. They don't do anything.

If their DD complains about the coach, they listen, find out why, and give advise on how they would handle the situation,

This is a little bit of semantics, but perhaps it should be "help the DD find a way to handle the situation."

 

[starsnuffer]

Interesting, a different board gave the distinct impression that parents "should be seen and not heard". That we parents are a necessary evil just to provide the player.

At higher levels (18 gold in particular), this is true. This is true because it is what is best for the student-athlete. , not because parents are "a necessary evil". Good parents understand this, and "fade into the background" to let their children take on the responsibility and perception that is necessary to take them to the next level.

Remember, most 18G programs exist as a vehicle to enable college recruitment (at least that is what they believe). The showcases are designed for college coaches and scouts to view the players, and both players and parents have to be very careful about the perceptions they give. Many a scholarship has been lost in the bathroom.

Imagine a college coach at your daughters game, and your daughter was playing and showing particularly well. The coach might make notes to contact your daughter, however then a parent says out loud, "Wow great hit! I've never seen Sally do that before!". Suddenly the coach crosses out his note and moves on to the next player figuring Sally had a fluke. This is why 18G parents have to sign agreements concerning what they do, say, and think during player activities.

Again though, this is for the elite levels of travel ball. While it is true that a lot of "wanna-be" organizations adopt this behavior, it's more of an issue of putting the cart before the horse and living through insecure ego rather then having anything to do with the team or the players.

-W

 

[FPMark]

InTheCrowd: As the level of play increases, parents have less responsibilities. At college level, parents show up, watch the game, talk to the other parents and go home. They don't do anything.



This is a little bit of semantics, but perhaps it should be "help the DD find a way to handle the situation."

Thats what I meant, just didn't say it very well... Thanks.

 

[mudbug]

Cheer for team, keep mouth shut about everything else. Don't embarass team, badmouth anyone, comlain about
playing time,etc. Treat all the girls like thrir own, help with team needs. Be sober.