Paying for DD to ride the bench....Not My Thing

[schwabach]

To your point -- true story

My full ride track runner called me back in the day and said she was not getting a chance to participate in the track meets...and asked me to talk with her coach.......I told her: ensuring her team mates were properly hydrated is team participation especially when the team is paying over $80k a year in scholarship money....

If the coach tells you to wash the uniforms you better use the good soap when you do it.......

Full ride and not getting a change to participate in the meets? I always thought that the scholarship players were starters unless injured and, if not, wouldn't be scholarship players for much longer. Of course, I could very easily be misinformed.

 

[schwabach]

If your DD is on a TB, she should play on that team. There is absolutely no point in putting your DD on a team to sit and watch the game. The rule of thumb is your DD should be on the field about 70% of the time.

There is a basic math problem. A TB has to have 12 or so players in order to function over the course of a season. Kids get hurt, kids quit, kids have unanticipated conflicts (e.g., death of a grandparent). So, unless a coach has 12 players (or more), the team can simply dissolve midway through the season.

If you have 12 kids on the team not everyone can start every game. So, your DD has to expect to do some bench sitting.

I had it easy. My daughter only wanted to pitch and was happy to pitch every 2nd or 3rd game.

 

[tamss13]

The way you typed it up made you sound like a bit of a jerk, that's all. Perhaps in your discussion with the coach you were more gentle and tactful.

In general, I agree. I've had a few parents on teams with my DD complain about playing time. I told them flat out that if they want more playing time the quickest route is to join another team. I too would not want my DD on a team where she plays less than 50%. In fact, I want that number more like 90%. Of course I don't track that number. She gets innings on the bench but almost every other girl does too. I'm fine with that. She's fine with that.

At 12U, I would not join a team where she's not playing at least half the innings. Fortunately we have tons of teams to pick from, and at this age roster sizes are small so no one is sitting much.

Parents around me said I was nice. I kept saying she isn't ready yet. She is a new catcher less than 5 innings under her belt. We have a trainer and a step by step plan, but we don't want her to rely on her talent we want her to be technically sound.

Watching her play you would think she has played for years, but only 5 inning at most with 3 of those innings happening last weekend.

She was a CF/SS we had a double injury last November in our last rec game and she volunteer to step in..in the middle of the game......she played the last two innings and we were all shocked ..... even the umpire said wow you guys have three catchers and the coach replied no she has never played before. Heck she throw a girl out at 2nd on her second pitch at catcher.....

I don't have to argue with her when it time for catcher training. She reminds me. She really likes being catcher........but she is a SS/CF talent. She just not ready to step up she needs to build a solid technical foundation.

Man that dude got pissed......I was like wow......and other coaches were like he made you and offer other parents would have jumped at....but the parents with me said I was nice and they didn't understand why coaches were mad....our coach was good with it LOL......

 

[sluggers]

I had it easy. My daughter only wanted to pitch and was happy to pitch every 2nd or 3rd game.

I doubt your DD is "happy" about it...she likely just accepts that it is a necessity.

 

[tamss13]

Full ride and not getting a change to participate in the meets? I always thought that the scholarship players were starters unless injured and, if not, wouldn't be scholarship players for much longer. Of course, I could very easily be misinformed.

Depends on the school. She was at the Citadel Military College they were about the grades. So as a full ride athlete your job your freshman year was to ensure you can survive military life style and keep up your grades. Your Sophomore year is your year to shine. She holds a few school records. Great four year and daddy only had to pay for pizzas now and then

 

[Orange Socks]

If I can play Devil's Advocate- it doesn't sound like he's dictating terms to her coach. He's being transparent with another coach about what a situation would have to look like for his DD to play for him.

I'm always surprised at how many coaches feel like they are entitled to have really good players in roster spots 10-14, and then try and pull the loyalty/dedication/#trusttheprocess card to guilt kids and parents into filling those spots instead of going somewhere that they can play. Find kids who want to be in those spots and let the kids who want to play ball go play ball without calling them names or accusing them of not wanting to complete, etc. Maybe they just aren't that good yet and want to just simply get to play the sport?

12u teams shouldn't have 14 kids anyway, in my opinion.

You are right. They should have 12 at 12U

14U=14
16U=16
18U=18

 

[schwabach]

I doubt your DD is "happy" about it...she likely just accepts that it is a necessity.

Who knows. I suppose older pitchers start to figure out that even if they want to, pitching multiple games on both Saturday and Sunday isn't a great idea. I liked it most when there were 2-3 roughly equal pitchers.

 

[Orange Socks]

And remember, we are talking about PAYING to ride pine, not receiving said education value. Give my DD a full ride to be your pinch running speedster, we might have something to talk about. Ask her to give up a full ride as the starter at a DIII school to for a partial scholarship and being that pinch-runner? Not happening.

Why do you think your DD will be riding the pine if she came over to this team? No player should ever be riding the pine at any age division or level of team. If there are players on any given team riding the pine, then the coach is doing it wrong. Aren't most dugout benches aluminum these days anyway?

 

[txfastpitch07]

I've seen knuckle headed parents absolutely destroy great teams, and by extension, drain their kids of any desire to play. It actually happened here recently with a girl that is a GREAT pitcher and the kid is an absolute sweetheart. They're now on I think their 4th or 5th team in a year and a 1/2. The pitcher's mom has it in her head that her daughter needs to be THE ONLY PITCHER! And runs her mouth constantly from the stands any time her daughter is not pitching. What's worse is it's "almost" as bad when she IS pitching. Constant comments about calls and defense and how her daughter is "the only one trying"! It's absolutely ridiculous. I think they're finally on a team that literally only has ONE pitcher (not sure how anyone expects to go far in this game with that kind of mentality) They even changed school districts to move to one that didn't have any decent pitching. They've alienated themselves around here from just about every "good" team because all she does is cause problems and everyone says the same thing, "they'd LOVE To have the player but dealing with mom makes it a hard pass..."

 

[JumboJack]

I've seen knuckle headed parents absolutely destroy great teams, and by extension, drain their kids of any desire to play. It actually happened here recently with a girl that is a GREAT pitcher and the kid is an absolute sweetheart. They're now on I think their 4th or 5th team in a year and a 1/2. The pitcher's mom has it in her head that her daughter needs to be THE ONLY PITCHER! And runs her mouth constantly from the stands any time her daughter in not pitching. What' worse is it's "almost" as bad when she IS pitching. Constant comments about calls and defense and how her daughter is "the only one trying"! It's absolutely ridiculous. I think they're finally on a team that literally only has ONE pitcher (not sure how anyone expects to go far in this game with that kind of mentality) They even changed school districts to move to one that didn't have any decent pitching. They've alienated themselves around here from just about every "good" team because all she does is cause problems and everyone says the same thing. They'd LOVE To have the player but dealing with mom makes it a hard pass...

Unfortunately this is an all too common occurrence in youth sports. My oldest plays TB and my youngest plays club soccer. I know of some great kids that either are not playing or are constantly changing teams because of their parents idiotic behavior.

Either the parents reputation precedes them or it manifests itself pretty quick.