For instance the other day the coach told them to go and hit in the cage before the on the field warm ups began. Once they arrived at the cage some hit some didn't and choose to goof off instead. Once the game started the strike outs and poor at bats started to rack up. The coach gives the team a talking to about what was going on and left them to discuss it among themselves. DD brings up how the pregame warm up weren't very good and that we as a team need to do a better job of preparing for the game. One girl took that as an attack I guess saying how do you know what is best for me and on & on. Finally DD told her look I do not care what you do or don't do I was just simply making a suggestion, so next time we can't buy a hit we should ask ourselves if we were truly ready or not. BTW the young lady mad about her comments hasn't had an at bat this year.
Never in a million years!
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For instance the other day the coach told them to go and hit in the cage before the on the field warm ups began. Once they arrived at the cage some hit some didn't and choose to goof off instead. Once the game started the strike outs and poor at bats started to rack up. The coach gives the team a talking to about what was going on and left them to discuss it among themselves. DD brings up how the pregame warm up weren't very good and that we as a team need to do a better job of preparing for the game. One girl took that as an attack I guess saying how do you know what is best for me and on & on. Finally DD told her look I do not care what you do or don't do I was just simply making a suggestion, so next time we can't buy a hit we should ask ourselves if we were truly ready or not. BTW the young lady mad about her comments hasn't had an at bat this year.
There are only two girls that are actually softball players & the other two are the players (who are the managers)sisters that have any complaints about her. There are only three Sr on the team that start the rest are Freshman (they have a fairly strong class). The two girls on the team that dislike her, one is a Sophomore and the other a Freshman who has been playing with her for four years now in school ball, never had a complaint from her during those 4 years.
She said after last night and the emotion that she got from her teammates when she was allowed to enter the game proved to her where she stands with them and said nothing else matters to me now. I do not know if you read my update post #12 but that really helped her get past this. She said her biggest concern was that everyone hated her because that is what the coach told her.
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The problem is that she took the Sophomore's spot and the girl is just buddies with the Sophomore. Since day one the Sophomore has been bulling her and to be honest something should have been done a month ago when summer practiced started. The girl will spit seeds on her and say sorry I didn't see you there. She comes home with big bruises at times because when she bats and DD is catching she will release the bat to hit her with it during the back swing and be like oh I am so sorry the bat just slipped out of my hands. She will get in with her little group of 4 and talk about her in the dugout that children do the list goes on and on. DD has never brought this to the coaches attention because she doesn't want to create conflict in the team LOL. Talk about that back fired on her after what started Saturday night.
A coach telling a player that "everyone hates her" is 100% inexcusable. They need removed from the position ASAP
That is what hurt her the most.... During the bus ride home one of the SR players sat with her and told DD not to worry about what she said and that the coach told her the same thing years ago. The SR told her that she says that so she doesn’t single out anyone or have you trying to figure out who it was. My DD tells me that none of the older players care for her. The funny thing is that my DD really likes her and has no problem with the way she handle this situation. Myself and her Mother see things a lot differently lol.
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- Mar 28, 2016
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That's really sh***y and not a good situation. I really hope that things improve. If they don't, I think you have to consider pulling her out of that environment.
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obbay
Banned
Some here have had good experiences in HS ball, but at our school it sucks!
I can't even begin but suffice it to say, it is similar to your situation, but your coach is worse!
DD decided after last year that she was done and wouldn't be back to thus team thus year (Senior year). The coach is a big guy, football coach and after 15 years of coaching softball still doesn't understand the game or the players. Doesn't realize that picking favorites and inflating stats of those players sends a negative message to the players who actually care.
My DD was in a similar situation to your DD, tho not as bad but still bad. She was a captain and got no respect. Coaches have players vote for captain, saw she didn't get enough votes but named her a captain anyway because they unanimously felt she was best. Players started mumbling asking around because they didn't know who voted for her. Starting at preseason, the team would resist everything she did. Two of those resisters are coach favorites, popular and overrated players, who were named captains this year. She got a little support from the coaches, though not enough. They didn't realize they had set her up to fail.
Shes done with that team.
I don't know what to tell you other than there are many of us who share your pain. Don't let your DD lose her love of the game. THAT is what was happening to DD. Fortunately where she trains in the off season AND her TB team provide a lot of support. If she had been forced to go back this year I think she might have quit Softball altogether.
Funny thing - We go to the World Softball Coaches Convention (at Mohegan Sun) every year for the last 4 years. This year in one of the panel discussions, the players spoke dismissively of HS ball as if it were Rec ball (which was refreshing to hear that we aren't wrong in that belief!) In reality, at our school it is just a fanci-fied Rec ball team with cliques and bad coaching.
I can't even begin but suffice it to say, it is similar to your situation, but your coach is worse!
DD decided after last year that she was done and wouldn't be back to thus team thus year (Senior year). The coach is a big guy, football coach and after 15 years of coaching softball still doesn't understand the game or the players. Doesn't realize that picking favorites and inflating stats of those players sends a negative message to the players who actually care.
My DD was in a similar situation to your DD, tho not as bad but still bad. She was a captain and got no respect. Coaches have players vote for captain, saw she didn't get enough votes but named her a captain anyway because they unanimously felt she was best. Players started mumbling asking around because they didn't know who voted for her. Starting at preseason, the team would resist everything she did. Two of those resisters are coach favorites, popular and overrated players, who were named captains this year. She got a little support from the coaches, though not enough. They didn't realize they had set her up to fail.
Shes done with that team.
I don't know what to tell you other than there are many of us who share your pain. Don't let your DD lose her love of the game. THAT is what was happening to DD. Fortunately where she trains in the off season AND her TB team provide a lot of support. If she had been forced to go back this year I think she might have quit Softball altogether.
Funny thing - We go to the World Softball Coaches Convention (at Mohegan Sun) every year for the last 4 years. This year in one of the panel discussions, the players spoke dismissively of HS ball as if it were Rec ball (which was refreshing to hear that we aren't wrong in that belief!) In reality, at our school it is just a fanci-fied Rec ball team with cliques and bad coaching.
- Jun 11, 2015
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As a HS coach, and for all HS coaches, this is the starting point for coaching. There are softball players and there are girls that want to play softball. I coach them the same way but my expectations for each group are different. The skills are in getting the most out of each group and meshing the two groups into a cohesive, focused team.
