High School experts!

[cuzmail]

The reason for closed practices is that you don't want 20 sets of parents, with 20 different opinions, second guessing your every move. Do you want 20 people coming into your place of employment and telling you how to perform your job?

The coach was hired to do a job, if you don't like the way he/she coaches, your DD doesn't have to participate. She doesn't have a god given right to play school ball.

I don't agree. As part of any job, you need to listen. Listening and learning are part of growth and any self respecting coach at any level should want to grow. The don't have to agree or implement, but they should listen. 20 opinions are just that and it is up to the coach to decide if any are opinions are valid or not. No coach should mandate that no one speak with them about an issue - perceived or not.

Say a coach believed in something yet someone could offer a persuasive argument, video proof, ..etc that they may be wrong. Should they ignore it and stick with their belief simply because they are the coach?

If I have an employee who is not willing to listen to alternate ideas in the event they may learn something, then that employee will not be with me long at all.

My DD is in 7th grade, so I don't have a dog in this fight.

 

[Amy in AZ.]

We will have to disagree on closed practices. I do not see a reason for them, in softball. If I am adapt at what I am coaching, there is never a problem with parents.

Hold a meeting prior to the season and discuss parent behavior. Get the players on board and they will encourage their folks to be quiet.

 

[Rocketech1]

I don't agree. As part of any job, you need to listen. Listening and learning are part of growth and any self respecting coach at any level should want to grow. The don't have to agree or implement, but they should listen. 20 opinions are just that and it is up to the coach to decide if any are opinions are valid or not. No coach should mandate that no one speak with them about an issue - perceived or not.

Say a coach believed in something yet someone could offer a persuasive argument, video proof, ..etc that they may be wrong. Should they ignore it and stick with their belief simply because they are the coach?

If I have an employee who is not willing to listen to alternate ideas in the event they may learn something, then that employee will not be with me long at all.

My DD is in 7th grade, so I don't have a dog in this fight.

First off, I agree a good coach should also be a good listener. A good listener to the PLAYERS concerns. Take ten parents from DFP and you would probably get 10 different opinion on how best to run a practice, coach a game, hit or pitch a ball, etc. Too many cooks in the kitchen causes chaos and is highly ineffective. And certainly, no parent should interrupt a high school practice and give their two cents about anything unless there is an immediate danger to a kid, which is an extremely rare occurrence.

Secondly, you said:

"If I have an employee who is not willing to listen to alternate ideas in the event they may learn something, then that employee will not be with me long at all."

In high school, the employee IS the player and the employer IS the coach. In general, the player needs to listen to the coach, you play under his or her rules or you choose not to play. It's pretty simple.

At 16, 17, 18YO, hopefully you have educated your kids enough on how to deal with adult figures and people in the position of power. You need to start letting go....

 

[coach james]

Charm, Tact, give it your best shot.

You are in a challenging situation. Best thing to do is the sandwich approach:

1)Bottom Bread.... Complement - "Excited to play a part in your team, you put a lot of work in, as parents we appreciate it etc..."

2)Meat....Your reason for meeting - "Ultimately my DD is a team player and she will work hard at whatever you ask her to do. Let me tell you about our journey in pitching and show you why she does what she does. If you could give me a few minutes to show you some clips about what she does and why she does it I would appreciate it. I would like to get your opinion on what she is working on."

3) Top Bread...Complement- "She is so excited to play for her high school and wants to do whatever she can to help the team win."

Love this analogy... where does the cheese and mayo fit in? Lol

 

[FP26]

I am a big fan of parental input and I do not shy away from it. But it is interesting how much a parent's input/opinion can vary from their children's. A few years ago at rec ball I had a player that consistently played center field. She did very well at that position and liked the position very much. She knew what was expected of her and worked hard to fulfill those expectations. I had heard from another parent that this player's mom was upset so I decided to approach her rather than waiting for her to come to me (family friend so we spoke quite often anyway). She was upset because her DD never had an opportunity to play infield, and "both of them" felt that she was being played in center field "unfairly". I apologized and stated that I never knew that was what she (the player) wanted to do. I started her at second base in the very next game. Before the game even started, the player asked if she did something wrong in center field. I said no, I just thought you deserved an opportunity at another position. By the end of the second inning, without even getting a ball hit to her, she asked if she could go back to center field. From that day forward I have made more of an attempt to listen to what my own DD wants instead of what I think she wants.

 

[Joe]

It looks like the HC was toying with you. Just figured he would find an easy way to annoy you. You said you have a history with this coach - so...
You really have no reason being at a HS practice. Daughter was a 4 year starting pitcher, never attended a practice or interacted with the coach.

 

[cuzmail]

Secondly, you said:

"If I have an employee who is not willing to listen to alternate ideas in the event they may learn something, then that employee will not be with me long at all."

In high school, the employee IS the player and the employer IS the coach. In general, the player needs to listen to the coach, you play under his or her rules or you choose not to play. It's pretty simple.

The player is the student. The coach is the teacher and therefore an employee of the district.

I do agree that the player should be the voice, but I was referring to the arrogance of a HC who refused to even speack with a parent without knowing what the conversation would be about.

 

[Rocketech1]

The player is the student. The coach is the teacher and therefore an employee of the district.

I do agree that the player should be the voice, but I was referring to the arrogance of a HC who refused to even speack with a parent without knowing what the conversation would be about.

You are not allowed to go into your kids math class during school hours and tell the teacher she is teaching calculus wrong, just because you might have a PhD in math and be more educated than she is. What makes you think you have a right to attend softball practice and tell the head coach she isn't teaching correct softball skills? If you think you can do it better than apply for the position. Otherwise you look like one of those know it all parents who micro manage ever aspect of their kids lives. These are young adults who have played softball for probably 10 years, no HC is going to destroy their abilities in three months.

In high school, my parents didn't attend a single practice of mine, in fact they missed most games because we played right after school when they will still working. Most of the starters went on to play soccer in college. Our incompetent coach didn't stop them from performing at a high level.

 

[coach james]

There are a lot of teacher references in this particular thread. I know in the majority of schools, states, or districts this is mandated. However, in our small Indiana town, this rule is not enforced. The last several coaches were not teachers. Including this particular guy. He's a factory worker, who applied for a part time job. In fact his dd has already graduated. He's there for the check. He has no pitching experience, and wasn't even a bucket dad. Yet he has decided to exclusively work with the pitchers?!?!? If you had paid as much as $100 an hour with a pro for over a year, how would this make you feel to have him changing your dds mechanics? That and that alone is the entire premise to this thread!

 

[Madsdad]

Go Coach James,
In our area it is part of collective bargaining, if you are a teacher, you are entitled to the position and the check. Some are good and some down right suck.
Now to add to our mess, the volunteer pitching coach (also graduated from the high school) played D1 ball and is respected at the school. If I were to post video of what she teaches you would scream in pain, and I'm not kidding. Do you think for one second that I want her working with my daughter? There are people who know very little and don't mind and even like this woman. They however don't know the truth nor do they care enough to learn. These are the coaches we need to protect our player from. Not all are bad but those that are, should not coach.