Dreaded Bucket Dad Syndrome

[Crystal Brown]

I'm guessing he doesn't read anything here. Until he does, you're going to have to put up with him not knowing how much he deosn't know. I seem to remember you've posted about him in the past spouting out incorrect things before. Didn't he attend a lot of your DD's pitching lessons? He should have learned a few things. Or is he the type of guy who will only listen to what he thinks he feels is right and then runs in zigzag line with it?

I might suggest some rolled up socks between his teeth held firmly in place with a generous amount of duct tape.

He doesn’t need to read, he has eyes and watch college ball....according to him. DH has attended all of her lessons. He takes what he wants and basically run zigzag line with it. D still works with H/E instructor because dad likes him. I like him too, great coach, always supportive and knows how to communicate well with kids...



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[Crystal Brown]

Crystal,

Next time you and D go out to play catch, have dad come along. Toss him the ball and ask him to show her how it's done since he's the expert. If he is game, and actually does try this, he'll find out how difficult it really is. Then, at night, away from D... you bring it up. The key is to do it away from her.

Saying something, good or bad, after every pitch is bad, regardless of if you're a parent, a coach, or both. The more someone says something after each pitch the more that kid is going to depend on that feed back. After every pitch she will look for feedback on what she did right or wrong. When doing my lessons, I only say something (good or bad) every few pitches. And the last thing you want is a kid dependent on a parent's feedback because it WILL spill over to games... then the parent is "coaching" from the stands.

Bill

I give dad credit here. He does try to pitch. At every practice, he will pitch to her before throwing batting practice. D gets pitching and catching practice done....even though she no longer catches in games. What he does is how he understands pitching...this is also how he is trying to get her to pitch. Dads understanding of spinning the ball is good enough to give D good batting practice. He moves up closer to her to make up for the lack of speed when he pitches to her.


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[Crystal Brown]

Tell your DH that he will enjoy the games much more if he just sits back and watches. I put myself as far away as possible (usually LF,CF or RF..depending on the field) so I am not tempted to say anything.

LOL...I have mentioned this before. His response “that is stupid, how are going to see how she is doing from over there?”


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[Crystal Brown]

I used to sit in a lawn chair behind the backstop off to the side. I wouldn't say a thing. Even in the most pressure packed situations. Parents would come up and ask how I could be so calm.

Had a mom of one of my students who was a pacer. I had asked the girl if seeing her mom pacing made her nervous and she said yes. Then I asked her the same question in front of her mom. To her credit she answered yes. Mom never realized what she did could affect her DD on the field. After that mom sat off to the side and just shouted encouragement to her DD.

This would be nice.


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[Crystal Brown]

Elongate your arm, Please!!!!!" Loud enough so you could hear it from the freaking parking lot. And no, I haven't a clue about how the kid was going to do whatever it was he thought she should be doing.

Dad says this as well. This instruction has taken out Ds arm whip. Last 2 games she had to be pulled. Could not find a strike and walked 5 batters in 2 innings of the first game and was pulled not even an inning into a game when she had already walked 4 batters. Nearly in tears and dad tells her “need to follow through.” I don’t dare say anything to dad...just not worth hearing his mouth.



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[Crystal Brown]

This would be nice.


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I think the biggest difference between DH and myself is that I am not afraid to ask people with pitching experience for their expert advice. What is the worse thing they can do, say no? I haven’t had that happen, yet....since most people I have spoken with have a genuine love of the game and don’t mind sharing their experiences or giving feedback. Not only have I learned a lot from these people, I have gotten to experience some pretty cool stories as well.


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[grcsftbll]

Those parents are pretty irritating to play. We played a team a couple of weeks ago with either a coach or dad (I think he was probably both) who was yelling instructions at the pitcher every single pitch. During the game! It's obnoxious, and I don't think it helps. Not sure what you can do about it if he won't stop though. If we did that to my DD I think she'd start to hate pitching. She gets testy about a reasonable amount of feedback.

 

[mikfish711]

This thread makes me realize that I have been "that guy" in the past. Time to take a deep breath and not turn it into instructions

 

[KPower]

Dd had a girl on her team and her dad would yell to his daughter on every pitch - good or bad. She looked to him after every pitch. He would tell her not to listen to the AC who called pitches but take her calls from him (dad). Dd was catching at the time and she said it made it so hard to catch - she never knew where to set up because she never knew if the girl was going to throw dad’s pitch or the one AC had called. As a parent I couldn’t stand listening to him. It was distracting and obnoxious. There were several instances where parents on the opposing team would get exasperated with him and tell him to quiet down. He was a hot head and on more than one occasion things got out of control. DD’s HC hated conflict and never told him to quiet down. It was a rough season! The girl was a very good pitcher and has gone on to win PGF nationals but she is not missed by many parents because of her dad.

 

[Crystal Brown]

Softball Pitching – The Bucket Dad Syndrome
By Coach Marc

There is a disease that often goes undiagnosed.

Pitching (and other skills too) is very technical.

It takes a lot of hours to learn, master, and refine the various technical elements of pitching if you include all of the pitches.

It’s very easy to confuse pitchers.

All you have to do is to give them too much info.

And you know what, coaches, parents, and instructors do it all the time.

However, well-intentioned dad do it much more often.

In their desire to help learn faster, they provide feedback to their daughter on each and every pitch during pitching practice!

What a mistake. For three reasons.

1) The kid becomes dependant on that feedback. They aren’t learning to think on their own and analyze themselves what happens. They aren’t learning to be their own coach. They rely on their dad (or pitching coach) to do it fothem.

Bad! Bad! Bad!

2) You see, the brain can process only so much info at the same time. Too much of it and they are confused.

Overloading the brain with info is the same thing has rush hours on busy highways.

3) Giving feedback on each and every pitch DOESN’T allow timeto learn. It gives 1 pitch to fix whatever you are working on.

It’s not enough.

So what do you need to do?

Shut up (more often).

You have to determine an objective for each session, then pick drills to work on that objective and use only a few cues or key words to reinforce what you are teaching.

Only work on a few specific technical elements. Not everything at the same time.

Give feedback ONLY every 5 pitch. The rest of the time – shut up.

Let the pitcher figure out and adjust. It’s gonna be hard if you have the Bucket Dad Syndrome.

However, it’s gonna be much better in the long run for your daughter or student.

Simple sports pedagogy.