Coaches -- Please Communicate with Your Players

[Chaz McNulty]

Parents do not need an explanation about the batting order.

I agree 100%. The think it's ridiculous when parents get in a huff about their kid going from batting 2nd to 7th.

I think that many parents make the mistake of equating a volunteer coach with a paid high school teacher. I find the most successful coaches live by the mantra "if your daughter has any issues or problems I am available 24/7. If you have any issues or problems - I don't care."

I have seen so many parents make meetings with coaches over the slightest perceived slight. What they never realize is that the content of these 'meetings' do come out, and often the other parents get a good chuckle out of it. They also risk having their child get labelled with the 'CWP' tag. There was at least one girl trying out for DD2's team this year that didn't make it because she "Comes With Parent".

 

[quincy]

For some reason DD has always been asked to bunt a lot which annoys me sometimes, she doesn't care. She knows were coach is if she has an Issue with it.

With 9 players batting, she just wants to be 1 of the 9 doesn't care where.

In the all important 8u I informed the coach that she does not like leading off the game, went in 1 ear out the other. Coach made a point of her leading off game when we were visitors. Liked the coach.

 

[BobInMadison]

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[Chaz McNulty]

I have seen several cases where coaches refused to communicate with the parents because they said they only wanted to deal with the girl directly, and then also refuse to give a straight answer to the girl. You can't have it both ways.
And, I am talking about paid coaches here. Paid HS coaches (who, I admit, get so little money they might as well be volunteers), and paid TB coaches.

I would say if the daughter raises an issue and the parents don't like what the coach says, then they should leave the next season. Only in the most extreme cases should the parents set up a meeting that has anything to do with on-field coaching. By extreme I am referring to the coach using abusive language or emotionally abusing players.

I would just caution parents that set up meetings to expect that the contents of the meetings gets out to the other parents and the rest of the league. Sometimes when you think you are advocating for DD, you are actually making things tougher down the road.

 

[BobInMadison]

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[ian]

I would say if the daughter raises an issue and the parents don't like what the coach says, then they should leave the next season. Only in the most extreme cases should the parents set up a meeting that has anything to do with on-field coaching. By extreme I am referring to the coach using abusive language or emotionally abusing players.

I would just caution parents that set up meetings to expect that the contents of the meetings gets out to the other parents and the rest of the league. Sometimes when you think you are advocating for DD, you are actually making things tougher down the road.

I dont understand. In one breath you say you dont want to talk about 'coaching' with parents and in the next breath you say you will tell all the other parents about the 'coaching' meeting? What kind of games are you playing? This sort of behavior is strange.

 

[Chaz McNulty]

I dont understand. In one breath you say you dont want to talk about 'coaching' with parents and in the next breath you say you will tell all the other parents about the 'coaching' meeting? What kind of games are you playing? This sort of behavior is strange.

Not playing any games. I think you mistook me for a coach. I am a parent of two DD's.

As a parent I always hear about these meetings. Softball is a small community and gossip spreads.

edit to add - I did coach my DD1's team 4 years ago in Mite. But I was not speaking from the point of view of my experiences as a coach, I was speaking from the point of view as a parent over the last 3 years.

 

[quincy]

One update -- in the case of DD 3's TB team, I did finally hear from the head coach, who promised to talk to the assistant coach about the lack of communication, and what the assistant coach was doing. The HC sent a very nice email, along with a very good explanation as to why she didn't get back to me sooner.

Which is fine with me.

I am not going into the details of this, except that there was a lack of communication that troubled DD 3 and me. It appears the issue is being addressed, which I think is better for the organization. This is a relatively new organization, and they want to build a good reputation.

If you do not get an anwser to your question/ concern it is worth being annoyed IMO. Might not like the anwser but you should get one.

 

[ian]

Not playing any games. I think you mistook me for a coach. I am a parent of two DD's.

As a parent I always hear about these meetings. Softball is a small community and gossip spreads.

edit to add - I did coach my DD1's team 4 years ago in Mite. But I was not speaking from the point of view of my experiences as a coach, I was speaking from the point of view as a parent over the last 3 years.

As you experience more you will find that good lines of communication will always be better than dealing with a insecure coach who cant justify his decision making.

 

[Chaz McNulty]

As you experience more you will find that good lines of communication will always be better than dealing with a insecure coach who cant justify his decision making.

I think this is where we differ. I believe in letting the coaches coach and do not believe that a coaching decision needs to be explained to the parents. Even if it isn't obvious.

Our coaches have a parent meeting at the beginning, mid, and end of the season. Ask questions then.