To go or not to go, that is the question....

[ms244]

My 14yo DD is a Freshman and has been invited by the HS Coach to join the Varsity team on a softball trip to Florida in March. They are traveling by bus and playing a tournament and then driving back by bus and attending a home game at Univ of Alabama on the way home.

The coach asked me if we (parents) were planning on going. Since we are new to the scene and don't know many of the parents/players yet, I don't know what the other parents are doing. The rules for the players are simple: They must travel down with the team, stay with the team in the hotel and travel back with the team. If parents want to come they are welcome, but must leave the player with the team. Parents are allowed to stay at the same hotel as the players, but the players will bunk with the team, not with the parents. I am 100% okay with the rules that the coach has so far.

I think this will be a great trip for my DD. She will be able to surround herself with Juniors and Seniors and play softball in Florida in March! She is really excited about the trip and has kicked it into another gear with her training and practices.

The question: Do we as parents go with or let her go with the team and let her experience the trip alone with the team or do we come with and watch her play? My wife wants to go because it would be a small vacation for us also, but she understands that our DD needs her space and time with the HS team.

 

[James Smith]

I am not sure I would be comfortable with DD going, but if we decided she can go we would go with her. You will not be in the way that I read your post.

 

[Amy in AZ.]

I go. There is just too much that can go wrong. Your DD will learn to operate a little bit on her own, but you will still be there with a watchful eye. Most of these trips are 100% OK, but I only hear about the ones that go wrong and the girls drink or something.

 

[RubberBiscuit]

I think you need to be realistic about where your DD is on the entire maturation timeline. Saying she is 14 does not really give us the right feel for the situation. Some girls are mentally still VERY young at 14 while other girls, especially when they have older siblings are just like seniors....

Giving my opinion from what I know - the ONLY way I wouldnt go is if an older sibling was going along and was rooming with the 14 yr old.

 

[ms244]

Thanks for all the replies. A little more information to answer some of the questions/thoughts that have been brought forward.

My DD will be 15 at the time of the trip, she has a December birthday. She is more mature for her age, but also a little on the shy side also. She does open up with some of her teammates, and a good friend of hers is a Senior that is going on the same trip, but not sure if she is going to bunk with her or not. The trip is 14 hours away, so that makes the decision for us to go a little more important. We can't jump in the car and drive 4-5 hours in case of a problem.

There is a meeting this Thursday to discuss the trip with the team and I will know more about the travel and accommodations that we should be expecting.

 

[soupy62]

If giving her some space is an issue but the wife wants to go. Then go down, stay at a different hotel, go watch the games and leave the team after the games are over. If she needs you then you are a text away but when they arent playing you and the wife can enjoy the florida weather.

 

[cmustangsfp]

We would be following the bus, but that is just me and my wife.....

 

[oregonfp]

My daughter was a freshman on varsity last season. During spring break her HS team went to a 2 day tournament a couple hundred miles away from home. My wife and I went also but stayed at a seperate hotel. About 80% of the the other varsity parents went also. It was a great time to get to know the other parents.

 

[SoCalASABlue]

I have a problem with any organization (travel, HS, etc.) telling me that I HAVE to entrust my minor child's welfare to them. Sorry but I've heard too many horror stories to trust anyone that completely.

 

[ms244]

I have a problem with any organization (travel, HS, etc.) telling me that I HAVE to entrust my minor child's welfare to them. Sorry but I've heard too many horror stories to trust anyone that completely.

The HS Coach said that we are welcome to come. I am asking if that is normal and accepted by other players/parents.