I think it is good to play for a school team. My daughter played middle school softball and the overall talent level was not very good. She was the loosing pitcher a couple times when she threw a no hitter. I think it helps them to work through adversity. Anyone can be succesful with a team of all stars around you. You can find out a lot about a player when things aren't going their way. I always stressed to my daughter encourage her teammates. Parents from other teams often commented to us that she showed a lot of composure when we had missed 3rd strikes.
The surrounding talent
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- Nov 29, 2009
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So a 12YO can't see when one of her teammates makes a mistake? They don't need their parents to tell them when a mistake was made if they have any understanding of the game at all. And they can count too. They know if someone makes 3 errors in an inning.
- Nov 29, 2009
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From what you describe your DD is a tweener right now. She has the desire and "want" to be her absolute best but does not have all the physical skills at this time. However, she wants to put in the work to get there. It's a VERY tough situation for any player to be in, much less a 12YO girl when her teammates don't.
I think the best thing for you to do is to remove yourself from process. Sit down with her and have a very frank and open discussion about the levels of ball she has the option of playing. With the LL team she will have teammates who may be more interested in the social side of playing ball. If she plays there she will have to try and understand the level of commitment, or lack thereof, her teammates have. That is something that can be hard for a 12YO girl who LOVES the game as much as your DD does to fathom. Then let her make the decision based upon the best information you can give her.
If there is any way possible try to move her into a part time travel team. I know it's a HUGE family commitment. But you'll never know what she's capable of until she's given the opportunity to shine or fail.
Another option is to move her up to a 14U team in LL if possible. She may find the competition and skill level a better overall fit.
As for MS ball. There is a huge jump that takes place physically with most girls from the 12 to 14 year old ages. The girls mature physically and get much stronger. So for her to play behind two older pitchers is not uncommon. Take the time to work with her to allow her to improve. If you need ideas on where and how to start ask the folks here on the board. You'll find mostly good advice from those who've gone before.
A quick side note. I was working with one of my 9YO girls last week. She moved from an 8U all-star team to a full time 10U A level travel team this season. Dad made the comment that her whole softball "attitude" had changed. She was much more serious about working and improving. I told him it was because she was surrounded by "like minded" teammates so the expectations have been raised and she understands it. Your DD may benefit greatly from being in that type of team environment.
Good Luck to your DD and I hope you're able get her in the best softball situation possible.
- Sep 10, 2013
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I moved DD up from rec to travel about 2 yrs ago. she didn't get much mound time, but the experience garnered from the TB games were invaluable. DD's softball tryouts for MS starts in a few weeks. if DD makes the MS team, it'll be double duty for her.
i've always told DD. you can't control what your teammates do. if you throw a strike and catcher drops it and the runner gets to first. okay. as a team, not good, but you did your job. don't get frustrated (easy to say, hard to do), but just keep doing it. getting frustrated on the mound isn't going to help you in any way good. you can't choose your MS teammates, but any experience (good teammates or bad) will help her grow. Experience is the best teacher.
i've always told DD. you can't control what your teammates do. if you throw a strike and catcher drops it and the runner gets to first. okay. as a team, not good, but you did your job. don't get frustrated (easy to say, hard to do), but just keep doing it. getting frustrated on the mound isn't going to help you in any way good. you can't choose your MS teammates, but any experience (good teammates or bad) will help her grow. Experience is the best teacher.
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- Jun 19, 2013
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I think it's ludicrous that people would criticize the OP as if there is anything wrong with looking at the play level of the team that your child is on and wanting it to be a better fit - something that would help them grow and enjoy what they are doing. My son and daughter have both been through the amazing opportunity to grow and mature by playing LL as well as rec ball and it can make for a long and frustrating season. Yes you teach a good attitude while you are in the situation and then you reevaluate whether you will do it the next season. Why you would want to intentionally continue to do that if you have a better option for them is beyond me.
I wonder if the people being critical over this post all use vendors in their jobs that mess up their orders - but refuse to change to another business because that wouldn't be nice? Do they go out to lunch continually with coworkers that they have nothing in common with and who are irritating just to grow in their tolerance? Do they join clubs and committees at school, church or in the community with people who have different goals and then keep at it year after year just so they can grow in their maturity. Don't ask your kids to do something long term that you wouldn't do yourself.
I wonder if the people being critical over this post all use vendors in their jobs that mess up their orders - but refuse to change to another business because that wouldn't be nice? Do they go out to lunch continually with coworkers that they have nothing in common with and who are irritating just to grow in their tolerance? Do they join clubs and committees at school, church or in the community with people who have different goals and then keep at it year after year just so they can grow in their maturity. Don't ask your kids to do something long term that you wouldn't do yourself.
Greenmonsters
Wannabe Duck Boat Owner
So you are advocating moving to another town?
Similar situation with us last year. Played with a team for a couple of tournaments and picked up twice with another to get pitching time. Zero pitching opportunities with first team and ended up finishing year with another team. That team has fell apart but we found a very good fit for last fall and this spring. We also picked up with another team for one last tournament and she did well, pitching them into semi-final game which they lost 2-1 in an ITB inning. Had a couple of coaches "call to see how things were going" over the holidays.
Every move we have made has been a positive experience. Don't be afraid to make the jump from league ball for your DD. Look for the right fit for her needs. I am not advocating jumping from team to team, but play with several teams to find your niche if possible. There should be some type of message board or forum in your area where teams post openings or chances to play as a pickup.
Every move we have made has been a positive experience. Don't be afraid to make the jump from league ball for your DD. Look for the right fit for her needs. I am not advocating jumping from team to team, but play with several teams to find your niche if possible. There should be some type of message board or forum in your area where teams post openings or chances to play as a pickup.
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If your kid is such a stud that rec teams frustrate her, then why not teach her to bunt/slap from the left side and make it *mandatory*. When on the mound tell her only curves, riseballs, and change ups - and no fastballs. *Lots* of change ups. Etc...
There are always new skills to be worked on. Rec leagues are a great place to work on them in a low-pressure environment.
There are always new skills to be worked on. Rec leagues are a great place to work on them in a low-pressure environment.
- May 21, 2012
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I can only comment on what happened to my DD. She's played rec and travel ball since she was in 4th grade. Dominated as a pitcher in both with no other pitcher near her skills. There was no motivation behind her and who is to blame her. I believe after the last travel ball game with so many errors (such as easy infield pop-ups dropping, the catcher missing a 3rd strike and it rolled down the first base line, etc.), both my DH and I decided she needed a change. It was just not a good situation for anyone. Come August we tried out for Club. She made the first team she tried out for and didn't want to try out for anyone else because she loved the coach. The girls have all become really close and honestly, I love the organization. What did come out of it was my daughter was no longer the number 1 pitcher. She is now practicing 3 times a week, working out every night, wants to go to the batting cages every chance she can, etc. It was the best thing to ever happen to her!
But here is the kicker - she still wants to play rec and travel. She understands her commitment is to the club team but wants to be able to play with life long friends when she has a night off. Yes - that means easy infield pop-ups will drop, the catcher may be scared of you, everything else that frustrated you will continue to frustrate you while playing this. I'll let you know how this works out... She may be driving home with her father after every game so I don't have to hear her yell. Or, she may be ok with it because she will play at the level she can on the weekends. Please note, she is turning 13 next month. She plays 12U club and will tryout for 14U travel. They are two totally different level of play.
But here is the kicker - she still wants to play rec and travel. She understands her commitment is to the club team but wants to be able to play with life long friends when she has a night off. Yes - that means easy infield pop-ups will drop, the catcher may be scared of you, everything else that frustrated you will continue to frustrate you while playing this. I'll let you know how this works out... She may be driving home with her father after every game so I don't have to hear her yell. Or, she may be ok with it because she will play at the level she can on the weekends. Please note, she is turning 13 next month. She plays 12U club and will tryout for 14U travel. They are two totally different level of play.
Good story. But what is club? I understand rec and travel, but not sure I've heard of club.
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