Switching Teams Early?

[CLM265]

SamRam has some good advice. Also, double down on the work ethic, people will notice. Talk to people during the season, guest play if you can and keep your options open for when teams form this fall. Create short term goals to accomplish so that it helps lift her spirits.

 

[sarge117]

My personal opinion is to follow through on your commitment (unless of course like others have said, the coach is abusive, or your DD is getting bullied. That I simply would not put up with.)

I have been doing this for the better part of 3 years and have seen so many players come and go.

Ironically none of the girls who left out team over a year ago are on the team they left to go to. And some are no longer on the team after that one. And one is on team number 4. It easily becomes a trend and coaches pick up on the history and it can raise flags for coaches.

Good coaching obviously means a lot. But the families and girls I see succeed realize a large portion of the responsibility of getting better lies with them. There the ones you see spending there times outside of practice on the tee, in the batting cage etc.

Maybe leaving is the right move for you, but unless the situation is abusive or your DD is being bullied, I would follow through on it and ask yourself if there is anything you and your DD can do to make the situation better.

If the answer to that question is no, spring isn't that far away

 

[fastpitch]

Is there someplace else that you know for sure is a better fit?

What is the goal for your DD here? Playing to have fun? hopefully to one day play in college?

If it was my dd and her goal was to one day play in college and she just doesn't like the coach, I'd have her stick it out unless there is something abusive going on. It will help build mental toughness. I wouldn't switch teams until after the season.

Now if she has no aspirations to play in college, maybe switching teams might not be so terrible if you know for certain there is somewhere else she will be happy. Her career is short enough as it is so you really should find a team that she will be happy on. However, in my limited experience, it always felt like the players that switched teams every year or in mid season were problem players or had problem parents and were never happy wherever they went... eventually having a closet full of different travel team jerseys... and a short lived career.

 

[Rocketech1]

If your gut tells you it's time to go, go. Life is too short for bullies, and bullying experiences can drag you and your confidence down the rest of your life. When you are an adult, somehow the adult bullies find you, too. They sense you have been a victim.

The original post never said she is being bullied, only that his DD and the coach have a personality conflict. So what, you need to deal with many people with different personalities and can't always bail just because your are not 100% on the same page as someone else. I say honor your commitment to the team until the end of the season. That is the right thing to do. I would never let my DD quit a team mid season unless the situation was abusive or posed an immediate threat to her well being.

 

[MsDinosaur]

Good coaching obviously means a lot. But the families and girls I see succeed realize a large portion of the responsibility of getting better lies with them. There the ones you see spending there times outside of practice on the tee, in the batting cage etc.

Maybe leaving is the right move for you, but unless the situation is abusive or your DD is being bullied, I would follow through on it and ask yourself if there is anything you and your DD can do to make the situation better.

IMO this is great advice! Unless there's bullying, use the situation to teach your daughter how to work through a rough patch.

 

[Little Angels Softball]

Beware the "team switcher" label. Three teams in about a year and a half is usually where I start applying it. Once the label is affixed, it is damn-near impossible to remove. Us A-ball coaches talk, too.

As long as the situation isn't unhealthy, help her work through it. You'll both be glad you did.

 

[PA SB Dad]

Agree with Little Angels. Two different teams in two years is OK, but switching in April to a third team in less than 2 years might be seen as a red flag (to be honest, three teams in three years pings my radar). As a HC, I would be reluctant to say yes without a prolonged tryout period (ie I would invite the player to practice with us for a few weeks before making a commitment).

 

[chinamigarden]

I would need to hear a whole lot more details before I could say switch teams. Adversity is a lesson for life, moving when things gets tough is not. So I am in the honor your commitment camp. I am, however, uncomfortable saying this without more details.

 

[justanotherguy]

My DD has been on several teams. Don't know if you could call her a "team switcher", as we've only walked once in 3 years in mid season. That team broke up 2 weeks later if that gives you an indication of why. Some teams have fallen apart, some were just horrible, and some had really bad coaches. There were a few times my DD didn't want to play with that team after a few tournaments. I told her what are you going to do in life when you have a bad boss? Bad co-workers? What about HS? You don't get to quit and go to a different team. You need to learn how to deal with all the issues a team can throw at you.

With that said, I think we've finally found a great fit. The parents are great, kids are great, and the coaches are great.

 

[CPSBDad]

I wouldn't exactly call it switching in a bad way--in terms as a label is concerned.

2nd year 12U played up on 14U A team. That team was local and was the best coached team DD has been on so far. Bummer it didn't continue. Coach had his reason which were good to not continue with the team. DD's best year ever playing softball, with maybe the exception of second year 10U. Another great coach.

1st year 14U played on a 14U B team. Horribly coached. Lost so many games I was numb by the time the season was final over. This team moved up to 16U and I didn't want anything to do with them anymore--many other's left the team as well.

2ndyear 14U playing/played on current 14U A team. It's an odd situation. Basically, probably not a good fit for DD. I'm not going to comment on the coach other than he did read DD wrong. Most likely biased his opinion about her and how to coach her.

Next team. 14U A. The team DD has turned down twice but did so in a gracious manner. The coach really likes her and feels she is a great fit for his style of softball.

Looking forward to it.