Rules Schmooles - Coach Team/Dugout/Parent etc. rules....who's got 'em?

[cmustangsfp]

My girls are 14 and 15 years old. I have an ABSOLUTELY no boys rule. They can come watch, but I better not see any PDAs anytime throughout the tournament/event, or while you're in uniform. Boyfriends in no way shape or form are allowed to communicate with the girls during games, warm-ups, etc.

Do you think I could get my DD's to sign the "team"rules and then threaten to hold it against them in a court of law?
Sorry honey, you can't date any boys because you signed the team agreement, remember? Don't I wish it were that easy. I got 3 DD's and already the guys (and creepy old men) are looking at the older ones (12 & 13).

 

[BaldNBeautiful]

I don't really like a 24 hour rule. If u have time, I'll talk after the game. It's in our handbook, talk to me the way you want to be dealt with. Simply put, scream and yell at me, you're probably gone for at least a few games. Question something I did in an adult-like manner, I'll explain and take your input for whatever it's worth.

My girls are 14 and 15 years old. I have an ABSOLUTELY no boys rule. They can come watch, but I better not see any PDAs anytime throughout the tournament/event, or while you're in uniform. Boyfriends in no way shape or form are allowed to communicate with the girls during games, warm-ups, etc.

I don't even allow them at practice. Every year it seems some unlucky boy wanders up to the practice field during that first week of practice.
That is one rule that I have never gotten a complaint about: players and parents both appreciate it.

 

[canyonjoe]

I'd like to extend that rule to any time I am still alive

 

[SCDad]

I don't even allow them at practice. Every year it seems some unlucky boy wanders up to the practice field during that first week of practice.
That is one rule that I have never gotten a complaint about: players and parents both appreciate it.

Are these boys ... friends, friend-boys, boy-friends .... What is the exact nature of their relationship? Or just flirting? is that determined? How about best friends? How about older sisters with boyfriends? Other players brothers who like another player? Grandparents? Stepsons? Single parents who are flirting with other single parents? Can they bring their dog?

Ha, ha, ha ... you coaches make me laugh.

All joking aside, every coach can make any rules they want. My DD is a player the rules-makers do not like ... other than she can hit a mean fastball really far.

Having won multiple championships, on every level till now, I find the teams my DD likes, and have won with, have the fewest rules.

Throw a bunch of rules at her, she tightens up and does not produce. Though my DD is probably the worst rule breaker, her coaches tend to loosen up the rules for her and everyone else. All relax and all are smiling to this day.

The really good players need to just relax, be in an environment which makes them comfortable, and produce at what they do best.

Sure beat them up over a PDA, a boy winking at them, or a hamburger, if you want. My DD will carry that onto the field, not produce, and lose. Though she is probably the worst of them, her teammates seem to elevate also when not being concerned with doing everything outside of the game itself, right.

 

[Amy in AZ.]

I've got a picture of my DD hanging on her long term HS boyfriend, in her softball uniform. We put it in the end of the season CD. I know some boys could be a problem, though. Girls don't generally hang around the baseball field or football field, do they?

 

[SCDad]

I've got a picture of my DD hanging on her long term HS boyfriend, in her softball uniform. We put it in the end of the season CD. I know some boys could be a problem, though. Girls don't generally hang around the baseball field or football field, do they?

My Jr. softball player goes to all the football games, both Varsity, and JV games. Probably not for the games either, but to be socially involved with all the boys ... ie the players.

Our softball team will go in mass to baseball games, and the baseball team the same to softball games. In our area, many of these games are scheduled the same night on facilities right next to each other. So yes, there can be plenty of co-mingling.

It is just a fact of life. Cannot stop it, nor really try to regulate it. In fact, if you accept it (though not completely embrace it), it all gets worked out between the young people.

Players at the high school level need to learn to play under pressure. If that means the boys are watching, so be it. In order to win at the high softball level, it must be encouraged for any, and everyone, be at the games. It is income for the schools and goes directly to the players.

In our high school, all practices are closed to everyone, no parents. That is the only proper way to regulate it. To pick and choose is wrong and one of the many misconceptions travel teams have.

As far as a softball player smooching it up in uniform. This rarely, if ever, happens. The beauty of softball is the young ladies learn to wear the pants. The boys usually follow their orders, especially in uniform. If it does happen, all the coach has to do is approach the player and say he does not like it.

That is where these rules-makers get much of it wrong. Most "offenses" can be handled gently, in private, without making a long list of rules for everyone to be "nervous" about.

 

[smddad]

Reminds me of a couple of years ago. A former player of mine was playing in her school-ball game. She was catching. A boy she was sweet on was there to watch her. His mistake was several comments on her back side and how nice it looked. What he did not know is that her dad, Officer T., was right behind him the whole time in uniform. Another dad stepped up and asked him, "Have you had the chance to meet her father?"

Yep...he was immediately off the suitor list.

 

[BaldNBeautiful]

Are these boys ... friends, friend-boys, boy-friends .... What is the exact nature of their relationship? Or just flirting? is that determined? How about best friends? How about older sisters with boyfriends? Other players brothers who like another player? Grandparents? Stepsons? Single parents who are flirting with other single parents? Can they bring their dog?

I could have been a little more specific. If they are there with parent/guardians or older brothers to provide a ride after practice that is fine. I coach Middle school and the system rule is "closed practices" although that is left up to the coach to enforce.

The issue started with HS boys wanting to come to softball practice to flirt, ogle or heckle the girls. The HS coaches put a stop to that quickly and it was one of the first things I did as well. It was an issue at the MS when DD1 played there. I saw quickly that if given the opportunity some 14 year old boys will quickly become a distraction. Would they go to baseball or football practice and try to talk to players when they are practicing? Of course not. It is disrespectful to the girl's programs to allow it.

 

[MsDinosaur]

What's up with the "no sharing helmets"?

Sounds like there's a story behind that one

My guess would be lice? And it seems like generally a good rule to me...

However, as someone said, even with a sensible rule, you shouldn't be so inflexible that you don't allow for exceptions. If something breaks on a helmet, like the chin strap grommet or the face guard screws, a girl may need to borrow someone else's equipment.

 

[AtlantaHitDoc]

I have a lot of suggestions, not too many rules. For the past several years, our rules have been a softball version of the Mike Matheny Manifesto - Home | Mike Matheny - that reflects our beliefs and personalities. It has served us well and the girls have all enjoyed playing for us. I encourage everyone to give it a read