last minute advice?

[RubberBiscuit]

So we are heading this weekend to a school that made it apparent that they really like n want DD.

They offered a basketball game and a dinner with the rest of the team for DD.

They also said "they want to talk about the potential relationship"

So you folks with your head screwed on right please tell me again what I should do/ask/not say????

I need yo, my extended family, to tell me the smart things I need to do on this school visit!!

 

[Amy in AZ.]

Mostly it is up to your daughter. I never liked for a parent to appear to speak for the girl. Such as "I think that she would like to go here." Have your daughter carry the conversation.

She might want to indicate what her major will be and see what the coach says.

 

[David Carter]

Just remember like a trying to buy a new car you do not have to sign on the dotted line right now. Unless you have been to several schools and have already visited this institution and your DD wants to ATTEND SCHOOL there and the offer is 100% of all costs if she also agrees to play softball then it can wait at least a few days while you think it over.

As Amy said let your DD take the lead in asking questions and getting to know everyone, also it would be great if she focused on some things other than softball, majors girls are taking, class load, available tutoring, the school environment, etc. Softball talk will work it's way in there and that's great but she needs to remember above all else she is getting a feel for whether she will be a fit at the school.

As always have her best foot forward, polite, respectful and courteous but still fun....Good Luck and have a great time.

 

[RubberBiscuit]

Wonder if schools/coaches use the tactic of "sign now or the offer isn't good after today"?

I know the school would give her a great education. I know the softball program there is successful. She appears to get along really well with the coach.

But DD here is a junior and this is her first college interaction that is landing with maybe an offer here.

For a number of reasons DD has not had really good exposure until this winter. A part of me is concerned that next summer she will really make an impact and turn allot of heads and get a bunch more offers. But then that's the summer before her senior year and is that getting too late then?..

The conservative move would be to jump on this if DD likes it and assuming they offer in the first place. But DD is poised for an amazing junior hs year pitching and then the summer with a very good TB team.......

Argh! Where's the EZ button?

 

[David Carter]

Just remember all offers are not created equal, in state vs out of state (will they waive out of state tuition, they should), 50%, 75%, 100%, does your daughter have good enough grades to get some academic money (sometimes you can get money just by having a high enough test scores), is it private school or public school (big money difference but sometimes more willing to help $$ wise), are you able to help or will she have to get loans for the rest?

Yeah there is no EZ button.

 

[Coach JV]

I agree with Amy. College students need to be accountable and stand up for themselves and their
values on visits. After all, once she selects a college, she is on her own. You have raised her, guided
her up until now. This is a test for you to see how well you did. Best of luck!

 

[RubberBiscuit]

So DD had a great visit. Everything we saw and heard just seemed right.

DD still hasn't taken her ACT yet so I believe they can't make any offers just yet,.....BIG hope/assumption as there were some really great other visiting DDs there. (We are definitely not counting any chickens,....just want to be prepared.)

But what I wanted to hear from you veterans out there on is "how urgent should a player be as a junior in HS?"

I know there are story's of seniors magically making a scholarship happen but most real stories I hear are seniors holding out and then somewhat desperately securing a JUCO spot.

Thoughts? If I think my DD is going to make the big impression this summer like never before should I trust in a good "summer before senior year" or is that not being realistic?

(I know there are no absolutes here but I would appreciate any opinions)

 

[David Carter]

Just keep networking, make sure you have DD follow up with the coach in a few days letting her know what a great time she had and how grateful she was to get to visit. Also touch base with her TB coach see what they think her prospects are keep on look out for clinics in the area where she can get to know more people. If her HS makes a playoff run make sure she touches base with the coach again as well as giving her a TB/showcase schedule for upcoming tournaments this summer.

 

[sluggers]

But what I wanted to hear from you veterans out there on is "how urgent should a player be as a junior in HS?"

If your DD gets an offer, you need to be very careful about rejecting it and hoping for something better to come along.

*BUT*, does the school fit in with your DD? Picking a school based upon who is going to give her the most $$$ isn't a good idea. The school has to fit in with your DD's life plan. If it doesn't, then she is wasting her time.

Thoughts? If I think my DD is going to make the big impression this summer like never before should I trust in a good "summer before senior year" or is that not being realistic?

Again, you need to look at this from the perspective of your DD's entire life. Softball is a teeny, tiny part of her life. Where does she want to go to school? What schools fit her needs for life after softball?

I've said this many, many times, but: When softball is over, it is O-V-E-R. She will have to move on (and quickly) to life in the real world where she will need to get a job, make car payments, and put food on her own table.

Consider this: Assume she graduates in 4 years. In a 15 day span, she will lose two things that consumed most of her time for her entire life: school and softball. (As an FYI, she will not want to come home and be your sweet little teenage DD.) You need to be thinking now about the day she graduates and where she goes from there.

Making her college decision based upon scholarship money is confusing priorities.

 

[RubberBiscuit]

"you need to be very careful about rejecting it"

You got me really interested in this phrase you made. Do you have any good info behind this or just a gut feel from yourself?

As for your other comments I am in complete agreement with you Sluggers. But the reality of what I can and can not afford is a major reality. This school that has shown interest in DD is definitely not on the lower end of the cost scale for schools.....

Well we might find out really soon if there truly is a continued opportunity for my DD or not. To be continued.....