last minute advice?

[JAD]

Please let us know how it goes! My DD is just getting started in the recruiting process, so I am eager to learn as much as possible!

 

[sluggers]

Do you have any good info behind this or just a gut feel from yourself?

If a kid is not a superstar (i.e., being recruited by 5 or 10 teams), then you should look at the first offer very carefully.

You and your DD are selling your DD's services for 4 years. Selling 101: It is easier to sell to someone who wants to buy than it is to sell to someone who does not want to buy. If you decline the first offer, that coach will move on to another kid. You, on the other hand, will have to start building a relationship with someone else. It isn't easy.

And...I know I'm sounding like a broken record...she needs to get this out of the way so she can start thinking about life after softball.

Quick story: When I first got into softball, there was a really good pitcher that my DD liked. We would go to her games, etc. My DD made her a role model. We started following the team, etc. So, after the girl graduated, my DD went to see the team play. There was this pitcher, still hanging out with the team like she was a player. She had no plans for the future and didn't know what she was going to do. She was lost. I went through something similar with my two DDs...the transition from "star athlete" to "one of many" is tough. Do *not* underestimate this problem.

RB, I get it about the money. Financially, it has to work for you and her.

You and she need to look at the total value of an education and what the school brings to the table. E.g., a degree from Harvard is worth many times more than the cost. Name recognition has become very important.

 

[GOINGDEEP]

Ray makes good sense again!!

There are so many things to consider as a college choice. It can become very frustrating. I know for some on this forum they are chasing down this dream with their DD as 8-9-10 graders, and sometimes I scratch my head at these things. For one reason is I seriously doubt any girl knows what she wants to do with her life at those ages.

Some may call me stupid but I was glad things worked out for our young ladies the way they did. They are not superstars ( despite having great genetic genes ) In our little group we have 7 seniors this year, 6 have signed or will sign in the next 2 weeks, the last is on the fence on her "choice" of continuing softball.

Will you see them on the WCWS? No. But I'd be willing to bet they will play for a smaller school, graduate, and get into their career before some you see during the CWS. Because "most" have good plans beyond the diamond. Sluggers a couple of years ago did a post on "majors" these upper athelets are taking, and mostly they're junk. A good percent still have to stay in school a couple of years after ball to take courses they couldn't keep up with or schedule around the rigorous top D1 sports needs.

( rides combination of athletic, academic type scholarships )

Our SS signed D1, very smart girl and shouldn't have issues keeping up academically. She is doing a 4 year nursing degree. 80% ride.

Our catcher signed D2, a tad above average smarts ( not as smart as D1 SS ). Here dream was to go to college out of state to get away from the "nest" and a degree in teaching. 75% ride.

Our 2b/1b signed D2, average smarts but very gifted as a writer. Degree in journalism. 75% ride.

Our CF committed Juco, book smart but a true blonde. No idea what she wants to do. I'd assume maybe 2 years of Juco and she will hopefully find a path and continue at a 4 year university. 100% ride.

One of our pitchers committed Juco, struggles with grades bad. She will struggle with grades even at the Juco level. She will probably take something very easy ( dental asst, administration asst, medical asst ) and hope to pass them to even be eligible to play in the spring. But at least the chance for college is there, maybe she will "wake up".

My DD committed Juco, A with an occasional B type student. Has her heart set on being a Paramedic. Will take her 2.5 years so 2 of those are 100% athletic and the last .5 ( semester ) will be covered by acedemic.


I'm giving these examples because you MUST look beyond the softball luster of college. In a few years it's done and over besides the beer SP league. So your choices should be what is best and what fits into your DD's dream of life long career. It's not trying to impress the neighbors or people on this forum with fancy school sball programs.

 

[Indiana]

Thanks to everyone for posting their stories and advice!! One assumption that I am working under is that the best way to open doors and to attract scholarships (of any kind) is to perform as well as possible on the ACT and/or SAT. To those of you who have gone through this - have you found this to be applicable? If a student athlete accepts an early verbal offer, is it contingent upon test scores and maintaining an acceptable GPA?

Everyone has given amazing advice which is often difficult to express to younger kids. My 12 year old is still under the assumption that his life's plan is to play pro football for seven (seven - exactly seven) years before retiring to the Caribbean.

DD's freshman English class is studying "Romeo and Juliet". As a class exercise, the teacher had parents list what qualities they want in their child's ideal partner. I listed good grades, life's goals, higher education. The kids then listed what they wanted. DD listed cute, wears a beanie (the hat equivalent of sloppy jeans, as I understand it!), funny. The college search seems to be like Romeo and Juliet - our kids have stars in their eyes - for us parents it is such a fine line between letting them dream and pointing out reality (a penchant for beanie wearing does not pay the mortgage).

I guess my biggest question for all you veterans out there - is it OK to wait just a little bit longer? I've tried to have college conversations with my freshman DD but emotionally she is just not ready. Can I wait through the summer and re-visit the college search in the fall?

 

[David Carter]

Thanks to everyone for posting their stories and advice!! One assumption that I am working under is that the best way to open doors and to attract scholarships (of any kind) is to perform as well as possible on the ACT and/or SAT. To those of you who have gone through this - have you found this to be applicable? If a student athlete accepts an early verbal offer, is it contingent upon test scores and maintaining an acceptable GPA?

The scholarship pays for school DD still has to be ADMITTED to the university, now in most cases this is not a big deal unless they are just a terrible student but they might still have to take some remedial type classes their first semester if their academics are not up to par and it does also depend on the school the standards at Harvard are higher than State U and State U is higher than your local JUCO.

 

[MsDinosaur]

DD keeps talking about schools like Yale, Harvard, MIT... It's still a long way away from 7th grade, but I figure it's great for her to aspire to that--if she seriously works toward that goal, it should mean that she'll definitely have the grades and test scores to get into a good university somewhere.

Yes, she loves softball, but we keep telling her that it's the education which matters.

 

[RubberBiscuit]

If a kid is not a superstar (i.e., being recruited by 5 or 10 teams), then you should look at the first offer very carefully.

You and your DD are selling your DD's services for 4 years. Selling 101: It is easier to sell to someone who wants to buy than it is to sell to someone who does not want to buy. If you decline the first offer, that coach will move on to another kid. You, on the other hand, will have to start building a relationship with someone else. It isn't easy.

And...I know I'm sounding like a broken record...she needs to get this out of the way so she can start thinking about life after softball.

Quick story: When I first got into softball, there was a really good pitcher that my DD liked. We would go to her games, etc. My DD made her a role model. We started following the team, etc. So, after the girl graduated, my DD went to see the team play. There was this pitcher, still hanging out with the team like she was a player. She had no plans for the future and didn't know what she was going to do. She was lost. I went through something similar with my two DDs...the transition from "star athlete" to "one of many" is tough. Do *not* underestimate this problem.

RB, I get it about the money. Financially, it has to work for you and her.

You and she need to look at the total value of an education and what the school brings to the table. E.g., a degree from Harvard is worth many times more than the cost. Name recognition has become very important.

Awesome feedback y'all.

As for this daddy I think I have the priorities right and know that the "end" is coming soon for softball (as it needs to be for DD's hopeful long life ahead of her)

So DD here has got amazing talent - but again from my perspective a solid mid D1 capability. Since she has "come back" to the sport this last fall after quitting for 2 months (darn boyfriends!) it seems like she is getting follow-on talks from many different schools (from 2 exposure events). This kind of result makes me think that she just needs more exposure events and much more opportunities might come in. (still wondering how flawed this thinking might be....)

So putting all this feedback together it seems like DD should go after the current opportunity, if it truly is there, because I get the feeling you folks are suggesting waiting for this coming summer probably will not be as fruitful as maybe I am thinking .

Am I reading you guys right?

I know this has to be OUR decision but so many things in life are "hindsight is 20/20......"

God Bless.

 

[Greenmonsters]

Thanks to everyone for posting their stories and advice!! One assumption that I am working under is that the best way to open doors and to attract scholarships (of any kind) is to perform as well as possible on the ACT and/or SAT. To those of you who have gone through this - have you found this to be applicable? If a student athlete accepts an early verbal offer, is it contingent upon test scores and maintaining an acceptable GPA?

Everyone has given amazing advice which is often difficult to express to younger kids. My 12 year old is still under the assumption that his life's plan is to play pro football for seven (seven - exactly seven) years before retiring to the Caribbean.

DD's freshman English class is studying "Romeo and Juliet". As a class exercise, the teacher had parents list what qualities they want in their child's ideal partner. I listed good grades, life's goals, higher education. The kids then listed what they wanted. DD listed cute, wears a beanie (the hat equivalent of sloppy jeans, as I understand it!), funny. The college search seems to be like Romeo and Juliet - our kids have stars in their eyes - for us parents it is such a fine line between letting them dream and pointing out reality (a penchant for beanie wearing does not pay the mortgage).

I guess my biggest question for all you veterans out there - is it OK to wait just a little bit longer? I've tried to have college conversations with my freshman DD but emotionally she is just not ready. Can I wait through the summer and re-visit the college search in the fall?

I say YES! If she's not emotionally prepared to talk about colleges with you, it makes no sense to push it now. Sounds like she just needs a little more time to adjust to her first year in HS, which can be filled with big social and academic changes. Use this summer to start exploring colleges and visiting college campuses - out of town/state TB provides a great opportunity to see new things, places, and schools - and have her start thinking about what will be important selection criteria for her and exactly where SB fits in that mix. That should be enough for you to help her to put together a list of 25-50-100 possible schools to consider further and target from a SB standpoint moving forward.

In my DD's case, she didn't know exactly what she wanted but she knew throughout HS that college was more important to her than SB (probably an exception here)! She targeted schools based on academics and her other selection criteria before even considering the SB programs - she even applied to a school that didn't have SB! She contacted the SB coaches at the schools she decided she wanted to apply to and met them when she interviewed her senior fall. Fortunately for us, the NE has a lot of good liberal arts schools and DD found a great fit at a D3 that offered an excellent merit/financial aid package and had the SB coach she liked best. Although she may have sold herself a little short (a lot short, IMHO!) ability wise from a SB standpoint, I can't imagine her being happier at any other school. She's still having fun playing SB and if that ever changes, I have no doubt that she'll stop playing and spend more time enjoying all the other opportunities and things that attracted her to the school in the first place. Not your typical SB recruiting strategy or story, but true. YMWV (your mileage WILL vary)!

PS - Just to provide a little more perspective re the approach DD took - it may help to understand she's a self-described nerd (i.e., loves learning, favorite hobby=reading, 3.9 gpa, 2000+ SATs) who's also a talented artist and multi-sport athlete. Kind of a square peg who's never been concerned about round holes.

 

[RubberBiscuit]

Update -

DD had a long call with "coach" yesterday (HC of the university DD wants so bad to join). Apparently the coaches & the team all thought DD is a good fit. Wow!, DD is lit up!... This is so cool.

They thought she performed well at the Saturday social events and then at the Sunday camp too. Coach had some final questions and supposedly the next step is to work on some paperwork that coach is going to send via email.

My curiousity now is on what step is it that it is called that DD is in right now...? Are these the closing steps before a "verbal"? Are we "in" the verbal stage right now?..... Of course this is not nearly as important as DD's eyes right now.

Still regardless of how this ends this is a great experience for DD to see the "process" in action over herself.

I am reflecting at this moment on the amazing life experiences that DD has received from "high-level" sports in her life. Ya know so many out there in this country equate the high-level sports life for kids as too demanding etc etc. I have three kids and DD being the youngest. High-level sports has done soooo much to mature DD and prepare her for life that I many times severely regret that my two other kids didn't dedicate themselves to something "high-level". OK, I will stop being sentimental....

So for all you folks out there that were/are like me and you want to know everything there is to know about the process, I will keep up the updates here for whatever help it might serve to you in clearing up the unknown of this process.

Take care y'all.

 

[RubberBiscuit]

Update - DD got her second D1 school Unofficial Invite!!!

Whooo - hoooo for my sweet little DD (who is really 6ft of athelete that could kick my butt!)