Daddyball-ism

[EP Dad]

I heard one guy say that if a daddy is going to coach the team then it can't be the pitcher's dad. Apparently every experience he and his daughter had where the coach is also the pitcher's dad didn't turn out well for them.

 

[Momo'sDad]

If a Daddy were to take the time he devoted as a coach and put that focus solely into developing his own DD, the DD would be very, very good.

All you have to do is find a father who is completely objective about his DD. I haven't met one yet, but who knows? Maybe Diogenes can find one.

I'd like to think that I'm fairly objective when it comes to my DD. I honestly believe she's going to be a solid pitcher for her team this year, but I'd rather have her as our #2. I've seen the league's #1 pitch and she's very, very good. She's older and has a couple more years experience than Momo, so that's to be expected, but I'd really like to have her on my team. The league's #1A pitcher is a coach's daughter, so she's already spoken for. After that, there are 3 more solid pitchers who played 10u last year, and 2 of them are coach daughters, too, if I was given accurate info.

I've got my DD rated 8th on my evaluation sheet from yesterday, which would make her 9th as one of the good older girls is out with an injury. And truthfully, I only rated 2 of the girls higher because of their age/size.

If she weren't a coach's daughter (meaning that her draft position is set), she'd be off the board within the first 5-6 picks as a position player. This is what other coaches said, not me. There could be 10 really exceptional players that we didn't get to see yesterday who will be in the blind draft, but somehow I doubt it.

She could decide to quit the game forever this summer, but right now, I think I'm being realistic in my view that she's a special player.

 

[Ivy's Dad]

My DD prefers to have someone else manage/coach the team she is on. We practice in the backyard every evening (once the snow is gone and the temperature is in the 50s), and she likes to have a second opinion of her progress and mechanics. She doesn't believe me when I tell her she's hitting good, but will believe a neutral third party.

Due to lack of a better alternative, it looks like I might be managing her team this year. We discussed it, and she decided that it's better to have me manage the team than not have a team. She's not a pitcher, and would prefer to only play RF. She's very good at RF, but I will also have her play 2B since I prefer to have every player play a primary and secondary position. She's also requested that she bat in the bottom of the order, which I may or may not abide by depending upon how good the other hitters on the team are. My DD's a very good hitter (0.500 batting percentage lifetime, 0.648 on base percentage lifetime), but says she would feel like she would always have to prove that she belonged in the top half of the order since she would be the manager's DD. If everyone else on the team can hit decent, it shouldn't be that big of a deal having her hit 5 or 6 in the lineup.

I'm going to be as objective as I can, and try to make decisions on ability only. I'm also going to keep the communication lines open with my DD, since I know being the manager's kid can be difficult. My father was the head coach of a different sport when I was growing up, and he was always twice as hard on me as anyone else. I need to guard against falling into that trap.

 

[quincy]

(0.500 batting percentage lifetime, 0.648 on base percentage lifetime)

I am not sure what lifetime means but if you know that stat it is scary.

 

[starsnuffer]

Daddyball for rec is normal and is expected. Daddyball for any serious traveball team 14u and over is a big no no for me. If the head coach has a daughter on the team, I'll find another organization, thanks, just not worth it (it's expected that assistant coaches have kids on the team).

And yeah, I know there are ton's of travelball teams with daddy coaches. See the threads about the over-saturation of TB teams for more info on the subject.

-W

 

[Ivy's Dad]

I am not sure what lifetime means but if you know that stat it is scary.

My DD's only been playing a couple of years (she started in 12U), and an Excel spreadsheet is very easy to set up. I log her at bats, hits, and walks, and let the computer do the number crunching. I never tell her what her stats are unless she asks.

Since she started in 12U, I feel a running total (lifetime) is appropriate. If she had started in 8U, then a lifetime tally would be silly.

 

[Coach-n-Dad]

Ivy's Dad,

If you keep stats on your DD, it is a good idea to keep them to yourself.

I am a pitchers Dad. My DD started pitching at 12 and I have stats on her from the very beginning, pitching, hitting, fielding, everything. Until last year, I loved talking about her stats to all who would listen (folks here probably remember).

Last year DD played 16U ASA and even though I have her stats from the year, I rarely talked to DD about them and never talked to anyone else about them, including her coaches.

This year DD is playing 18 Gold and I still keep stats on her. No one knows what they are except for DW and I.

The fact is that if a coach wants to know stats, he/she will keep them. The stats that a parent keeps are irrelevant (except to the parents).

It's fun to compare the stats that I have to the "official" stats kept by High School or TB coach.

 

[Momo'sDad]

I'm going to be as objective as I can, and try to make decisions on ability only. I'm also going to keep the communication lines open with my DD, since I know being the manager's kid can be difficult. My father was the head coach of a different sport when I was growing up, and he was always twice as hard on me as anyone else. I need to guard against falling into that trap.

I never played for my dad (he was my Scoutmaster), but my daughter's a high-achiever and said she wants me to be hard on her this season. Her words.

I know that rec league coaching is as much about diplomacy as it is about player development, and I'd hoped (still hope) to avoid a scenario where my DD would be the #1 pitcher on a young team with a completely inexperienced coach...me. Safety, sportsmanship, and fun will be the name of the game, but I don't want her to get banged around too badly with no reliable backup in sight. Even if she likes pressure, I don't want her feeling that much, nor do I want the specter of bleacher grumbling 'coach's kid's fault' to be out there at all.

Despite my best intentions, I know when the rubber meets the road that I'll likely go a bit overboard in making sure my objectivity is readily apparent.

 

[Coach-n-Dad]

IMO, if it wasn't for "Daddy-Ball", there would be very little (if any) softball below 16U. The trick is finding a team that is coached by a "Daddy" where your DD can get the best possible experience and training as possible.

 

[chinamigarden]

I had a long rant about this topic. I deleted it because, frankly it rambled and it probably wasn't very nice. It seems to be a sore spot for some people. But I coach my girl. If you don't want to be on our team because of that, thats up to you.

I got into this to spend more time with my kids, the most time I ever spent during a season with my daughter were the 2 seasons I didn't coach. I find myself working with her at home, just like always, and my practice time is spent trying to teach a kid who either has a dad who could care less about working with her. Or her dad doesn't know a damn thing about how to play and I have to try to break her bad habits, that dad taught her.

My girl pitches, but I didn't put her in the circle someone else did. Now she is the best in our organization at her age. Should I take it away from her because I am coaching this year?