10U Rec. – Disgruntled

[quincy]

DD is being treated very fairly, I am just not happy unless ALL the players have a fair shot on the Team. If he had his way our DD would be in the infield all the time and batting 1st, I do not think that is fair. DD and I have discussed it and she does not either.

This is a Rec. Team, if she wanted to be out for blood we would join another Team.

I am sure DD would succeed with Stone City but at least right now she does not want to do it.

 

[quincy]

LOL seriously? At her age I was 'only' playing or practising softball 2 days a week. I had a hour and a half training and my one game. The rest of the time I was too busy being a kid to worry about softball.

My goodness this website makes me laugh sometimes.

Her choice, she enjoys it. I think she enjoys practice more then games. Her non softball firends get sucked into it and have a good time too.

 

[KevinC]

It sounds like you need to find another coach who shares your philosophy or start coaching yourself.

I agree in rec ball the emphasis should be on instruction instead of winning and all players should get some infield time.

 

[joemcq51]

I may be in the minority, but I really do not have a problem with the manager playing his kid anywhere he sees fit to. My DS and DD both played rec at some point. I may not have always like where they played or who played behind them if they pitched. I never once asked the coach to play my kids in a diff position or give them advice on who and where to play kids. The way I see it, they are didicating their time. Most rec coaches are new to the sport and just learning. I am thankful for their time and hard work. If they want my kids to play OF while their kid plays SS, it is what it is. I have always asked my kids to be the hardest working kid on the team. Have fun and learn. Do I want them to do well when they play? Hell yes. Do I push them to be better? Hell yes. Do I coach them outside of practices? Hell yes. I also will help any kid on the team who asks me for help. Still never would tell a coach where to play kids. It is their team and they need to learn from their mistakes and successes. If I didn't like it, I could either coach a team next season or find another team for my kids to play on the next year.

 

[redhotcoach]

I can't reference to the original post because I am confused on your meaning between the two posts.

Some thoughts from experience coaching both. Our league has both rec and travel teams, travel kids must play both, and most of us coaches coach both.

1. Play time, position play, line up spots, and etc. I never hear complaints from travel parents, but will hear lots from rec kids and parents even though I put in 4 times the effort in rec to be so called " fair"

2. Where does the idea of playing the outfield as a negative come from? I have rec kids grumble about It then have nearly every ball hit to them in a game. Plus any girl bored in the outfield isn't doing her job of backing up the bases.

3. "Dropped in the lineup". Who cares where they are in the lineup! Hit the ball and help the team no matter what the order. When I hear about batting order, I know ,with almost 100 percent assurance that the complaint is parents talking. After coaching 100s of girls, I have had 0 who were concerned with where they batted in the order, with exception of girls not wanting to lead off. Also, who says low in the order is bad. I always put a fast high contact "second lead off" batter at the bottom of the order.

4. Players constantly rotating positions should be done for the most part by 10u.

5. Dd is more skilled then the rest of the rec team, though I have to show the books to the girls proving she is on the bench more then every other player. Travel: she has never been on the bench, and no one has a problem with that as long as she is producing. I hear complaints from rec girls who sit two innings. Travel girls can sit complete games and be happy supporting the team.

6. Rec parents complain that I don't have enough practice for them, but only half the girls show for practices because they have dance pictures, tired from hard gym class today, or some other excuses. Same attendance subject, out of about 20 rec games only a few did everyone show up. It is a pure joy telling ump and other team "uh.....we only have 7 players."

7. If she likes playing or practicing that much, get her on a travel team. She doesn't have to devote everything to it. Play on a c team. I do think that travel girls and parents are playing and attending so many more games, that they don't sweat the small stuff.

8. Finally, if you don't like the coaching, do it yourself. I am sure they could use it, I know we never have enough rec coaches. Plus, anyone posting on a softball forum obviously is obsessed with the game and should be sharing their talent.

 

[Lozza]

"Dropped in the lineup". Who cares where they are in the lineup! Hit the ball and help the team no matter what the order. When I hear about batting order, I know ,with almost 100 percent assurance that the complaint is parents talking. After coaching 100s of girls, I have had 0 who were concerned with where they batted in the order, with exception of girls not wanting to lead off. Also, who says low in the order is bad. I always put a fast high contact "second lead off" batter at the bottom of the order.

Exactly. I bat 9 and I had the second highest batting average this year. My coaches have me there as they know I'm guaranteed to get on and be put around by the top of the order.

 

[ElmoBlatch]

My DD has been treated more than fair but I am in a constant battle with the Manager about playing positions and pitching. Because I am fighting for some resemblance of equality DD is bearing the blunt of my fight. You want person X to play in the infield, off DD goes into the outfield. You want player X to P fine, DD loses an inning.

Sometimes they will listen to me but if they do it only affects DD, their DD is not losing innings or going into the outfield. Same with moving players up in the batting order for having a couple good games, they swap DD out to the bottom of the order.

It is not, and maybe has never been, about the Team or other Players. It is about getting their DD ready for the next level and it is unfortunate that they need other players to do it. The good thing is DD has been moved around so much she can play any position except C.

I am tired of being the bad guy. DD sees herself in the lineup card at P or 1st. then asks why she did not play those positions. I tell her that X is practicing and they deserved a chance. So far she has accepted that but it is getting old.

If Managers are going to selfish SOBs, I am leaning into become one too. I am disappointed in what we have gone through this year.

You just can't win as a coach. No matter what you do some of the people will be unhappy. My daughter is on a team that has some minor issues (what team doesn't?) but I don't tell the coach what I think he should do about it unless he asks my opinion, and he usually doesn't ask. Why don't I say anything? Because I asked myself if I would like to switch places with him and the answer is a big NO. He's the coach and what he says goes. If we don't like it we are free to consider other options for next year.

At least umps get paid for the grief they get.

 

[softballphreak]

I'll never be a head coach again. A man's gotta know his limitations. But I'll be the best assistant coach I can be. And one thing I can assure you, I will support the head coach 99.9% of the time and there will be very few, if any, exceptions. That doesn't mean I won't disagree with the head coach but I will stand with him/her on his/her decisions.

 

[quincy]

Thanks for all the replies, I will re-read a few times and try to take the advice to heart.

DD did not want go to the game last night, In some part it has to be due to my poor attitude. That is unacceptable and I need to change my attitude immediately. Wish me luck.

 

[Sparky Guy]

DD did not want go to the game last night, In some part it has to be due to my poor attitude.

If you're going to voice your displeasure with a coach or anything else related to the team it's best to do so away from your DD. She may be just fine with everything. However, if you're not happy then something must be wrong with the team in her mind. She will not be happy then. Kids will follow their parents lead. Be careful where you lead her.