Youth sports--if your child doesn't love it, let her leave it.

[Doug Romrell]

My 16-year-old DD is excessive on the social (goofing off with friend). I believe there is a happy medium between the friends time and the time spent doing other things (e.g., playing a musical instrument, playing volleyball, doing community service, working toward the college education early, etc.).

 

[riseball]

...Mine "could" have made it. Chose not to..

Maybe. Maybe not. But without doing so she will never know. The road to success is lined with bystanders who "chose not to" who are indistinguishable from "those who could not".

 

[SCDad]

IMO, the "super-commitment" doesn't kick in UNTIL 16 or so when driver's license/driving, jobs, pocket money, friends, boy/girl relationships, other athletic/academic/social interests, career/college plans progress to the forefront and the players have to start making the individual sacrifices if they want to continue playing the game at a very competitive level. Softball is just one activity that some value highest and prioritize. I worry about the kids that don't have something that they have a passion for and and want to commit to. Softball is just but one of the options that some choose to pursue passionately.

Wrong, wrong and wrong. My DD was super committed at playing ball at 4 years old. Achieved level in the game many dream about. I beg you ... Do not wipe away the effort she made and the commitment she worked so very hard for... For well over a decade!!!

It is our pride. The folks who were involved ... Truly know. They respect us for it. I get that respect every single day when folks talk to us. It will never be replaced. It will always be there. To think DD's life, and respect, begins at 16 ... Is wrong in so many ways.

 

[Doug Romrell]

Maybe. Maybe not. But without doing so she will never know. The road to success is lined with bystanders who "chose not to" who are indistinguishable from "those who could not".

I would like to think that my DD could, if she wanted, work hard and get into college ball, but that doesn't necessarily mean it would happen if she worked hard to reach that goal. Of course, college ball isn't something that interests her. I'm struggling in my efforts to cultivate her interest in playing through 18, all due to the excessive desire she has to just goof around with all her friends. The point I want her to understand is that she's not going to simply give up on softball to further expand her goofing off with friends at the expense of her grades or household chores. She needs to face trade-offs. If she decided to quit softball, I would expect her to replace it with something other than expanded time goofing with friends.

 

[SCDad]

Maybe. Maybe not. But without doing so she will never know. The road to success is lined with bystanders who "chose not to" who are indistinguishable from "those who could not".

I like you. We have ours. We walk tall in our town. We have one more season to be on top.

My obviously could not make it because in her mind, she did not have the "right stuff". I get that, and truly understand that.

But the people in our town love her because of who she is. Because of her ability on the ball field. When you get old like I am ... It truly is enough. To stand toe to toe with the critics and be proud. Be happy.

 

[riseball]

Wrong, wrong and wrong. My DD was super committed at playing ball at 4 years old. Achieved level in the game many dream about. I beg you ... Do not wipe away the effort she made and the commitment she worked so very hard for... For well over a decade!!!

It is our pride. The folks who were involved ... Truly know. They respect us for it. I get that respect every single day when folks talk to us. It will never be replaced. It will always be there. To think DD's life, and respect, begins at 16 ... Is wrong in so many ways.

It is your daughters accomplishments and her life. You really should stand on your own with your own life. Not live through hers. It should be about her, not you.

 

[riseball]

Wow SC, just wow. What a kid does at 4 matters to the community? It makes you feel on top right now to have a kid in softball? Boy oy boy. I guess because it is your genetics, your parenting, your money that put her on top. I love my kids whether they are on top or not and proud to walk around probably because they help others from their own volition; who cares about their athletic feats...

So what happens after? You all fall down the social ladder into nothingness?

It is amazing how the accomplishments of today, quickly and forever fade into obscurity. Unfortunately some never understand this and spend their days reminiscing of past glory that has long since faded.

 

[SCDad]

I have my place. Do not worry.

I live through DD, sure as everyone does. If not ... You become OLD, and fast. I take her out to eat, as well as her friends, and talk about what young ladies want to talk about. It is a great life. Not married (widowed) as I. Enjoy doting on DD.

We made our accomplishments yesterday. Tomorrow we have one more HS season to make another great accomplishment.

It is amazing ... Once you look at DD as a grown women ... And not just a softball player ... How satisfying life can be.

Just one more season. We win, and we ride of in the sunset as winners. The last HS. Championship a couple years ago was the 1st for our town. Just one more, and this part of our life is complete, and well worth every minute.

And then it is grand babies if she is lucky. I have crossed over to another life already without softball being at the center. Soon enough, every one on this board will get there. Then we can talk.

Well ... Until the grand kids arrive.

 

[CoogansBluff]

As much as I love my DD ... She is still a women!! And society has shown us over and over that focusing on the necessary social stills to be just that can benefit a talented young lady many times over ... Than competing against a bunch on she-males. (Sorry folks ... It is appropriate).

That is the real question here. Make your own choices. We have made ours, and are proud of it.

Mine "could" have made it. Chose not to. As a parent looking in and talking to her, it is the issue of what being feminine is about more than anything.

Your daughter chose not to pursue softball at a higher level so that she could focus on being more feminine?

 

[riseball]

Your daughter chose not to pursue softball at a higher level so that she could focus on being more feminine?

Have to wonder how his comments will be received by his daughters "she-male" teammates? Quite the sense of community they have going on there.