Is it or isn't it...all about the win?

[stephanie]

I love the discussions on this board. And besides learning a heck of a lot of stuff, I have had my mind changed on more than one occasion by some very insightful people.

So, I got drug into a discussion after a game last night: Is it all about the win? Two parents, one question.
My answer was "no," but only if I was lying. Because, ultimately, games are won by some, lost by the others, and that is why we play.
I don't like losing when I play. I don't feel as strongly about it when it's my team playing, and I'm coaching. After all..I can't go in there and catch that pop fly, now can I? ( I've learned to let go of the things I really can't control.)
As a coach, the win for me is to see the growth in the kids. But the big win is when I hear them saying at the end of the season "I can't wait for next season!"
But that's not really what I'm asking about.
Is winning the game what it's all about for the players? Should it be?

I would love to hear what you guys have to say.

 

[GOINGDEEP]

I can some it up in one sentence. " Winning is not EVERYTHING.........it's the ONLY THING"

 

[SoCalASABlue]

I'd have to say it depends on your level of play. For rec ball, there are definitely social players that only care about playing with their friends and going to the snack bar after the game. For travel, I would say it's definitely about winning. Why pay all that money if winning was not the primary object?

I think for a majority of parents, it doesn't matter what level it is - it's about winning. I manage my DD's 12U team and also umpire. I umpired an 8U game the other night where the coaches and parents said things to these 6-8 year olds about their playing that I would never say to my 12U team.

 

[Coach-n-Dad]

I see no reason to play a game unless the goal is to win.

Is it "all about the win"? I guess that depends on what you consider a win.

 

[ctfastpitch]

Any team that takes the field is out there trying to win. And I think the importance of winning any given game increases as the girls get older. As someone else said, why else do you play the game. I guess the question is whether the attitude is "win at any cost". That mindset could make you do some things you wouldn't want to be teaching 10-16 year old girls.

 

[mudbug]

In competitive sports we have fun by trying to win. Its not the only thing, its not worth sacrificing honor or ethics for, but it is the primary goal.

Whoever said "Its not if you win or lose, its how you play...." obviously was not a winner.

 

[stephanie]

I see no reason to play a game unless the goal is to win.

This reminds me of family game nioght.
Sometimes, I play really badly to let the kids win....and it couldn't be any more boring for ME.

And then the kids dance around the room singing "We beat mommy!"
Who's raising these sore winners?

 

[Bishop]

It depends on the program and it's goals.

As Going Deep so elequently put, some programs are all about the win. The teams record is the measure of success.

Other programs have other goals. The program I work with is designed to feed skilled players into our school programs. Our players come only from our school district our coaches are volunteers and parents from the district. Our goal is a .500 season. If we do significantly better or worse than that in our season we picked the wrong tournaments and double header opponents. Get them enough wins to keep them engaged and enjoying the sport but enough losses to challenge them to improve.

We play ASA class A ball and travel to make sure we can find the right mix of teams to achieve our long term goals. Ultimatly if each game was a one run difference we (as coaches and the organization) wouldn't much care what the record was as long we knew the girls were pushed to play thier best to try and win. We might be a major exception to travel teams and SoCalASABlue might be right about the majority. It would certainly explain some of the behavior and attitudes I've encountered with other coaches. I've got to agree with SoCalASABlue about most of the parents. I've encountered a few who are just happy with thier girls getting out and enjoying themselves.

 

[mudbug]

Unfortunately, some people dont know when its important and when it isnt.

At ASA/USA nationals, its important

At a "coaches pitch" tournament, its not. But there are "travel" coaches pitch coaches that believe otherwise! Incredible.

The rest fall in between somewhere.

 

[GOINGDEEP]

My father always had some cool sayings he gave us over the years about winning.

"You don't just play to win.......you play to make everybody else lose".

"2nd place only means you were the last to lose".

"Some people weren't meant to win.....but your not one of those people".

"When you step on that rubber.....remember it's not velcro.....do your thing and get off as soon as possible".

He always told us these things with love. Never out of anger.