I know I'm right, but a little affirmation can't hurt

[Momo'sDad]

Just to be clear you're discussing strategy with your daughter?

Also, not sure on the wording but are team mom and you still together?

Yes and not really. We're very much a family and do everything together, but I maintain a separate residence outside of our daughter's home.

Our child is really smart and understands more layers of the game than her mother does.

 

[Momo'sDad]

I think you are screwed no matter what. My advice is to execute YOUR plan and pray it works. If you lose, you will never live it down. Reality is, it's rec ball. If the girls are smiling you are doing the right thing. Not sure about the whole 4th pitcher coming in, but hey its your team. I would think if you had 4 pitchers who could throw in a game, you would be ahead of the curve. Give em hell.

You're right, I am screwed! But let me tell you, the girls are having a blast and it sounds like almost all of them intend to come back and play with me next year.

We really only have 2 pitchers, but we've got 1 girl who has been working on it off-and-on for about a year and then another who just started working at it this year. I keep the expectation level appropriate for each of the players and they all define their own goals, but I do have a measuring stick to let them know they're getting better.

But let me tell you, #4 has the bug and has been to each of the pitching clinics this season and wants to be on the fall team to get more game experience. To me, when a girl has demonstrated she's putting in the work, then she's earned a shot at getting into a regular-season game.

 

[Momo'sDad]

I forgot to say that getting the young kids obsessed with stats at 10 is not a good idea either. They have a lifetime for that. Performance can be measured in other visible ways, not just counting up stats.

While I fully agree with you, in principle, the kids are very aware of the league standings and while I don't talk about fielding percentages or batting averages, I do help encourage the pitchers by talking to them about what they've done well. The only thing I really dislike is when our players don't swing the bat. I'd rather they swing at a bad one on strike 3 than look at a good one. So, I do track K(L)s for my own edification, but I also track good plays/at-bats and hustle plays, each of which is based on an individual player's abilities. That way, everyone gets game ball recognition for what they did well each game and all the players have earned at least 2-3 helmet stickers this season.

 

[Momo'sDad]

Are we going to start referring to "Crazy Parent" rather than "Crazy Daddy"? Holy moley... People fight so hard in rec ball because the stakes are oh so low.

Clearly, you are a colossal failure at coaching. It would be better to win all the games, have the kids hate each other, and have 50% of the parents loathe you.

Do you think they will start using the "Williams Shift" or decide to go with more riseballs than drops? This is meaningless drivel, but if she buys it and it keeps her off your back, great.

In 10U rec ball, where the right fielder can be distracted by the Good Humor ice cream truck?

I would like to comment more, but I'm kind of busy. I'll check back after the straight-jackets are properly secured.

LOL!!!!!

Our girls love ice cream, and after weeks of being denied the privilege during practice, I finally agreed to get them ice cream if they came from behind to win that day's game. They promptly did exactly that. And then the ice cream man didn't show! Disappointment all around. With about 30 minutes left in our session, though, one of the amazing dads we've got took it upon himself to go to the store to get a surprise for the girls. Softball and ice cream - what a perfect day.

The other parents love DD, but I can sense that they really appreciate the fact that I'm not here just to show her off to rec world. I know she's a terrific player, but other players also deserve to be in the game with the chance to make a play with the game on the line.

I can appreciate that life will be a lot different if she ever makes the move to TB, but quite frankly, I love the rec game. DD is having the time of her life, and I get to share in the ride. Could I really ask for anything more?

 

[Momo'sDad]

Did your wife every play softball? I truthfully wouldn't want her anywhere near the ball field. She will incite others and be on the phone with them, stirring up something all of the time. If she wants to win so bad, sign her up for slow pitch and she can go for it.

I love her mother, but she was never an athlete, so she never sat the bench or had friends who hated sports because they never got fair playing time. She's never hit - or missed - a game-winning shot. She's never been first to the finish line or intercepted a 3rd-down pass in the final minutes of a conference championship game, nor has she ever struck out with the bases loaded.

We lost a close one earlier in the season because I did not take the clock into consideration when setting up the game roster and because I didn't want to take #3 out unless I absolutely had to. If I'd been focused on the clock, I might've gone to DD sooner, but I didn't, nor did I have her properly warmed on that cool night before going in. Those are mistakes that come with learning how to be a head coach. So, with the game on the line, she wasn't able to hold the lead. Mom wanted to kill me. As I said in my game report, though, anyone who only cared about the final result missed a really great game.

Let's rewind it a bit - our best hitter was about 6 inches away from a triple or HR that would've put the game out of reach, but ended up striking out. We had our best pitcher in the circle at the end and our best hitter at the plate with 2 out in our half and we came up 1 run short. I would go into battle with those odds any day of the week and both of them have come through multiple times since then. And because they had failed earlier, the success was that much sweeter for them.

Rec ball is about a lot more than Mom comprehends. Safety is the top priority, but at the start of the year, I had a pretty non-athletic girl who'd never played a sport before. She couldn't throw or catch at all. And now she's getting time at 1B. We've got other success stories as well, including 1 girl who went from being in my beginner group at the start of the season to being nominated for All-Stars. I almost cried when I saw her name on the list.

I've already gotten far more from this season than I ever could've hoped. None of it is on video (that should be her job!), but these memories are going to last me for the rest of my life and I bet the same is true for some of our players as well.

 

[Lozza]

Yes and not really. We're very much a family and do everything together, but I maintain a separate residence outside of our daughter's home.

My main reason for asking was to see if there might be other issues at play, but from your description it's not!

Our child is really smart and understands more layers of the game than her mother does.

My only issue with that, as a coach, one player should not be getting that type of discussion. My mum coached me at your DD's age and I never had anything to do with the discussions on who plays where, strategy and I wanted to know that stuff. I learnt on the diamond. You could be giving your DD an unfair advantage so my only concern is to be careful with that. You don't want to appear to be a crazy daddy.

With your partner, I think the others are giving better advice than I could. Not married and still forget occasionly that I need to tell my boyfriend what I'm doing!

 

[chinamigarden]

I'm right, right?

Excuse me while I put on my Dr Phil costume.

Do ya want to be right, or do ya want to be happy? You can only pick one or the other.

Answer that question and you know the answer.

 

[chinamigarden]

I need her and she needs me, but things go so much better when we each mind our roles within the team. I leave the dugout stuff to her (save the one incident earlier in the season where I was out of line) and all the on-field calls are on me. I did suggest that she get certified, though.

Oh she sounds certifiable.

Hope you know I am teasing. I am sitting here being thankful that its you and not me right now.

 

[PAcoach]

Are we going to start referring to "Crazy Parent" rather than "Crazy Daddy"? Holy moley... People fight so hard in rec ball because the stakes are oh so low.



Clearly, you are a colossal failure at coaching. It would be better to win all the games, have the kids hate each other, and have 50% of the parents loathe you.



Do you think they will start using the "Williams Shift" or decide to go with more riseballs than drops? This is meaningless drivel, but if she buys it and it keeps her off your back, great.



In 10U rec ball, where the right fielder can be distracted by the Good Humor ice cream truck? I would like to comment more, but I'm kind of busy. I'll check back after the straight-jackets are properly secured.

This is no kidding, in what now seems like 100 years ago, when my DD was 10, in the middle of a game, the girl playing 1st base, ran off the field to the ice cream truck that was coming through the park we were playing in. Took off her cleat, pulled a $1 out and bought herself a fudge pop! Her father was screaming at her to come back, i was doubled over. all time classic

 

[bobbyb]

This thread is too funny to ignore, it conjures up a lot of images in my head…and reminds me of a rec ball game that I coached and my wife.

First…Anyone that has their wife or ex wife as team mom is asking for conflict!

You know the only thing worse than a "crazy daddy'? A crazy mommy!
Only thing worse than a crazy mommy? A crazy mommy wife!

Crazy daddy will eventually head to the outfield fence and stew. Crazy mommy will never let it go! She will sit in the stands and move close to you as possible...she will get louder...she might even design t-shirts that mocks you...she will have all other parents in an uproar...She will stir it up from facebook…the phone...to the game field! Crazy mommy wife…will carry it home for weeks maybe even months! So enjoy what you created! Just playing around…of course!

In seriousness… I think your doing it right for rec ball. I did it very similar...except i once played down to a team. That you can't do even in rec…especially in front of your wife.

For added amusement. We had a 13u team..2 -13's and bunch of 12's. A younger team from the same country school had 2-12's..bunch of 11's. Now…my kids parents and their kids parents…didn’t seem to care for each other a lot…for what ever reason.

I knew how good we were…so when we played them… I pitched #3. She couldn't throw a strike… Game stayed close…I am concerned....put in #2...she couldn't throw a strike. They were ahead…time was becoming a factor….I am REALLY concerned and my parents have turned on me…going from… looks to grumbling to complete silence.

We needed to get them out and score some runs. Brought in my dd. First practice throw...20ft above catcher. I look at her and shrug...she says... "dad this is a 11 inch ball". I checked.. sure enough they had been playing with a 11 inch ball the whole game.

Showed ump...he apologized for not catching that and said no wonder my other pitchers couldn't throw a strike. He said we would continue with the balls we been playing with though…as there wasn’t much time left. I am sweating profusely now.

Next few practice throws...told the dd to work it out. She couldn't….I am about to stroke out!

Told her to half pitch and it worked. She got next three out ... we got the runs and she shut them down their final at bats. Hugged her like it was the college world series! Who said rec ball was not important or competitive?

The parents of my team were ready to hang me! All they could say to me afterwards was "you sure made that exciting" without a smile...some just gave me that drop dead look…as they walked by. The other teams parents found it necessary to come and say “we almost beat ya'll” with a smile...not just one or two parents...but like a whole line of them!

My wife...became an immediate softball expert right then and there…on how i should or should not do things! She called runs…touchdowns…but she knew exactly what I should or shouldn’t do.

For two weeks she couldn't let it go. I think she called every relative we had and told them about my coaching. I got calls from people that don’t ever call. From then on if she and her friends didn’t like the opposing team for what ever reason (colors, parents..didn't matter)…they wanted them whooped…not beat…whooped!

Even my dd boasted all week..."I saved your tail"! I was the dog of the community and at home for weeks.

Lesson learned…don't play down...but if you can get a big enough lead and let others have a chance to play different positions...you can have a win win situation for all..be competitive and have fun. BTW..we had a great season and a lot of fun too…we had over twenty girls come out for the team the next summer…we all had a blast and everyone played at least 2 positions. I think we pitched 10 different girls (two teams) during that second season, maybe even more.