Do I have a legitimate reason to pull my daughter from her team?

[rdbass]

Seriously? I thought by 14u the girls should be addressing playing time issues for themselves. I mean, I would step in if a more serious issue was going on, (something crazy like verbal abuse or something) but I will leave it up to her to open the communication and see where it goes. I feel it never goes well when a parent addresses playing time.


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Seriously? I thought by 14u the girls should be addressing playing time issues for themselves. I mean, I would step in if a more serious issue was going on, (something crazy like verbal abuse or something)

So, playing time isn't SERIOUS to you. Playing time isn't CRAZY enough to you. Lack Of playing time on a TB to me is pretty SERIOUS & CRAZY to me.
Seriously.....OK then you see where that's been getting your DD. If YOU SERIOUSLY think DD should be starting or playing more than I would step in. If you think DD should be handling at 14 than I guess you will see where that gets her. Oh, you see where that is getting her. Remember the clock is ticking......tick... tock...
Unless you think your Dd should not be playing than disregard what I posted and let DD take care of the situation.
I'll bet big money that coaches LOVE a parent like you. Keep throwing money at them.

 

[Pop time 44]

I will see how it goes when she has the discussion with coach. I will step in if need be. Ok so what age do you think the kids should handle it without mommy and daddy stepping in?


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[Pop time 44]

Sounds like the coach perceives her as a weaker option behind the plate. Hard work is a requirement for playing travel softball. That is a given and a non-factor. At 14U she needs to outplay the other girls who play her position when given the opportunity. Competition for playing time increases at every age level for her from now on. Apparently, the coach likes her bat having her DP in all the games.

Is it her size? Is she small? What is her arm strength? You said the throws were late. Were they bang-bang plays or were the runners standing up dusting themselves off by the time the ball got there? Does she block and frame better than the other girls? Does she take charge of the team on the field? She may need some one-on-one training from a catching instructor to move her ahead of the other girls in the depth chart.

I know it sounds harsh, but some girls are not as talented as others, no matter how hard they work or how good their attitude is. If all it took was hard work then anyone willing to work hard would run as fast as Usain Bolt.

I don't know your DD, but I've been coaching 10's - 14's without a DD on the team for over 13 years. I've had great kids who did all the right things, but they were not as talented as the other girls who play the same position. Sometimes you need to step back as a parent and get an unbiased opinion from someone who is not close to your DD.

5'7" 150 lbs. blocks and frames very well.


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[sluggers]

I will see how it goes when she has the discussion with coach. I will step in if need be. Ok so what age do you think the kids should handle it without mommy and daddy stepping in?

If this were the normal situation where DD was catching X innings and she wanted X+Y innings, then you DD should be the one talking to the coach about PT. But, your DD isn't catching at all...which makes no sense whatsoever.

This is a more complicated discussion. It is more, "What specifically is wrong? If we do X,Y, and Z, will she get to catch?" Inevitably, the discussion leads to, "If she isn't going to catch, she has to find a new team." That is a lot to put on a kid.

 

[CoogansBluff]

Ok so what age do you think the kids should handle it without mommy and daddy stepping in?

If it’s simply a question of getting the coach’s assessment about the player’s strengths and weaknesses and what she can do to become more valuable to the TEAM (and not how to get more playing time for herself at the expense of somebody else), then DD can do that at an early age. Maybe 7 or 8.

But this isn’t purely about getting better and helping the team.

This is about helping DD.

I don’t want my DD in a situation of advocating for selfish goals when I’ve taught her to be a team player and to take whatever role she’s given and play it to the best of her ability.

But on the other hand, sometimes you have to be selfish to accomplish long-term personal goals.

Therefore, she needs an advocate so that she is not conflicted. She can continue to be the team player she needs to be while I gather information on how this team may or may not help her with her long-term goals.

Player looks after her team. Parents look after their DD.

 

[Pop time 44]

Everyone thank you for the advice. Since she specifically is a catcher, and coach doesn't seem willing to give her a shot anywhere else, I may have to rethink this and step in for her. Now my question is....face to face? Email? This coach is a bit of a hot head. She has stated before she doesn't like to talk to parents about playing time.


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[Greenmonsters]

A catcher needs to get catching time during games. A TB coach is a fool if they have multiple decent catching options but rely solely on one option given the number of games that may be played over a typical weekend tournament. If you're a catcher in that situation and not getting any game time, usually it means that the coach thinks you are a liability or that a coach is playing daddy ball and favoring his or an AC's DD; if such is the case, it may be time to find a new team.

All this said, I believe a catcher should learn to play another defensive position(s) well enough so that they aren't relegated to DP when not catching. Functionality at another position increases the likelihood of them always being in the lineup in HS or college, assuming they can hit of course!

 

[Pop time 44]

Omg hitting was not a problem this weekend. Yeah I don't get it. I try to truly step back and look. Something weird is going on. It doesn't add up.


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[55dad]

Don't be afraid to intervene if it becomes necessary. Your DD only gets to do this once and it should be fun. Playing a back-up role can build character but most TB teams are a business and you and your DD are the consumer. You are paying and owe them nothing.

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[Elk Grove Hurricane]

The rule that I was told by a former Team USA player and current hitting coach, as well as HS asst., is that if you're not playing 60% of the time, you're on the wrong team. I tend to drop that to 50% at the younger ages, and things get debatable when you have to factor in how to quantify DH playing time. The real question that only you and your DD can answer is whether you want to leave mid-season or wait it out until July.