DD not a fan of HS coach

[Nimrod]

DD is not hitting much in HS ball. She's a sophomore. She has committed to a college team.

This is a new school. The head coach is new. He frequently tells her not to dip her shoulder. He nags her about it. It might be that she's tilting too much, I don't know. But she does not believe in level shoulders. She has to be tilted at contact.

Anyway, the nagging does not work. In DD's mind, the only feedback that this coach gives her is criticism.

So today, he tells DD while hitting off a tee that she's dropping shoulder. DD tries to explain what she believes is the ideal contact point with the ball with tilted shoulders. The coach according to DD says something like ''I just want you to know because your college coach could take away your offer because of that swing.''

How far out of line was that?

 

[Nimrod]

DD just added that coach also said ''don't you think you would get more hits if you hit more balls on the ground.''

 

[JJS]

First, what an idiot. No, more balls on the ground does not equate to more hits.

Second, your DD is very lucky. She gets to learn to get along with, and perform under an irrational person that is most likely envious of her accomplishments. This will likely be a great life lesson for her when she finally enters the business world. She will either already know how to deal with those bosses, or she will be the boss and remember not to act like this to those she is managing.

Sorry, I can't tell you that it's not a big deal and will work out, because it probably won't. I can say that there is always a silver lining. If the coach tears her down, and she quits then he wins. If the coach tears her down and she retaliates then he wins. If the coach tears her down and she doesn't perform then he wins. If the coach tears her down, but she doesn't let it get to her, keeps her self confidence high and is able to produce under tense circumstances then she will win and will prepare herself even better for college ball and business.

You may look into buying her Dale Carnegie's book, "How to Win Friends and Influence People". I think there may be some information in that book that will help her out.

Good luck. Keep us posted on how the season goes.

 

[Nimrod]

Good advice. That's the way my wife sees these things. I'm glad I have her because she is not a sports fan per se and can see things from a real life perspective when all I see is the softball.

 

[laker]

I'm not exaggerating one bit here. My DD's primary goal so far for her HS team is to get a "Good job" from her Varsity coach one time, just one time. She went 2/3 the other day and drove in 3 of the 4 runs they scored in the win, nothing. I don't have an answer for you. But, this seems pretty common.

 

[Nimrod]

I'm not exaggerating one bit here. My DD's primary goal so far for her HS team is to get a "Good job" from her Varsity coach one time, just one time. She went 2/3 the other day and drove in 3 of the 4 runs they scored in the win, nothing. I don't have an answer for you. But, this seems pretty common.

It's too bad. This coach is not one to get angry or yell, but if you tell somebody just once a day something that they need to fix without ever telling them you appreciate them or like them, the cumulative effect is not good.

 

[Cannonball]

I am so sorry that there continue to be coaches like this out there. Video is his friend if anyone could get him to look at hitters. Most of the time, coaches who believe this stuff have never looked at video. They coach off of something said to them back in the day.

 

[Nimrod]

I am so sorry that there continue to be coaches like this out there. Video is his friend if anyone could get him to look at hitters. Most of the time, coaches who believe this stuff have never looked at video. They coach off of something said to them back in the day.

He's doing what he thinks is right. He's not a jerk or anything. He just doesn't know better and doesn't know the effect he's having. It would be great if DD could pull him aside and have a talk about how she feels, but she wants no part of that. As parents, we have to decide whether this relationship will help DD grow or whether it's just unhealthy and needs intervention, which would entail my having a calm talk with coach about it.

 

[JAD]

How are her results in games? As a coach the last thing I would want to do is mess with something that was working, regardless of how unorthodox it looks....a player can stand on her head in the batters box for all I care as long as she knocks the cover off the ball!

 

[let it be fun]

How are her results in games? As a coach the last thing I would want to do is mess with something that was working, regardless of how unorthodox it looks....a player can stand on her head in the batters box for all I care as long as she knocks the cover off the ball!

DD1 had a HS coach who wanted to "fix" things that didn't need to be fixed. I stayed out of it and all was fine. Annoying but fine. DD just gave him the old "yes sir" and continued to do what her hitting coach was teaching as opposed to what HS coach was trying to get her to do. It is his first year and he will most likely figure some things out. Don't underestimate the fact that he may be a little intimidated by her ability and feel the need to "coach" her to prove what he knows not just to her but to the other girls. Coaching girls at varying skill levels and then dealing with all the girls on your team who have hitting and pitching coaches who might teach them different things can be an interesting act of diplomacy.

As JAD said, positive results in games should help him see that she can hit.