All right here we go serious stuff. My niece is a marginal 12u player. At times she can hold her own at times she struggles but good girl. At times difficult to deal with but she LOVES softball. Im coaching/manager 12U All-Stars for our town this year (My 1st yr) and tryouts are next Sat. She wants to try out. I love her I know as far as her "Talent" she may not make team. Its my niece. Her father (My brother in-law) is currently fighting late stage lung cancer the has spread to Lymph nodes. Chemo and radiation. Its looking rough! My sister in-law told me not to do her any favors for this situation to treat her like any other girl. What do I do? I feel I want to help bring some joy to my nieces life but then I will be taking 4 mabey 5 players from my in house team. That's too much for it not to look political. I want her to have some good childhood memories but............... Damn. There may be more talented kids trying out that deserve a shot. You know All-Star parents are NUTZ!! Any help Please!!
All-Star try outs/player with sickdad.
- Thread starter just4today
- Start date
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Do you have the option of making her a "team manager" where she gets to practice with the team, but may not get to play? The coach of my DD feeder ball team (middle school) did that with a couple of 6th graders and at the end of the season he got them into some games when we were up by 5 or 6 runs.
I would ask my DD to step aside.
- Jan 25, 2011
- 2,278
- 38
Amy your awesome, I would bet your dd would of been fine with that.
That is a good idea i can add a 13th player that never plays except injuries or attendance. She will always practice and i can cover the cost of her uniforms. Good idea
If I recall correctly, all-starts is only a few weeks long. But for the kids, this will be remembered for a long time. The experience your niece will have greatly out weights the politics, and may be the ONLY happy memory in the next few months. Put her on, it is your team anyway. If the other parents don't like it, they can coach next year and pick their own team.
Being a coach can be a thankless job if you do it right often with more headaches than rewards. If you can't have some nepotism to get your niece the last roster spot on the team you are coaching then you are doing it wrong. It isn't like you are making her starting SS over someone more deserving.
And if you can take as many players as you want, then it isn't even a hard decision.
I changed my attitude about this sort of thing a few years ago after I realized I was overlooking opportunities for my DD over other players in an effort to look fair - and what was really happening was that I wasn't really being fair to my DD. I am coaching because I am willing to step up for my DD and her friends when others were not.
And if you can take as many players as you want, then it isn't even a hard decision.
I changed my attitude about this sort of thing a few years ago after I realized I was overlooking opportunities for my DD over other players in an effort to look fair - and what was really happening was that I wasn't really being fair to my DD. I am coaching because I am willing to step up for my DD and her friends when others were not.
Who does the evaluations? Can you have someone else also do the evalations? If she is legit in t he top 12 of the other guy's than take her on the team. If she isn't, the idea of her as the 13th player has a lot of merit if she is OK with the idea of sitting a lot. Some kids are, some kids are not.
Put her on the team and don't look back. If numbers are an issue maybe do as Amy suggests and ask your DD to step aside. If it comes to that all three (3) of you (Coach, DD and neice) will be better for it in the long run.
Whole lot of things are more important than Softball despite what the crazy Allstar parents say or think.
Whole lot of things are more important than Softball despite what the crazy Allstar parents say or think.
