Second day of high school softball(voluntary)yesterday for DD. As most probably know, DD missed her entire freshman season due to spinal fusion surgery. She was just released to do any sports related activity August 1st. She has been playing with a select team since then.
Fast forward to yesterday. Second practice. Strength conditioning practice. Translated to: weight lifting.
Good news...dd can be a softball player. Bad news....DD will NEVER be a weight lifter. Three rods in her back, and 18 screws directly into her spine. Doctors, several PT docs, all said weight lifting is a no go. High school coach is having the girls do squats, straight leg dead lifts, and overhead presses. All three of those exercises put huge amounts of strain on the spine. She tells coach she can't do those things. Coach starts giving her a hard time about not wanting to work, and wasting time being there, and quote from coach (according to DD) "well you are here, so you need to do something" and "if you are not suppose to bend over at the waiste, how are you gonna field a ground ball" DD then demonstrated bending her legs, and back and simulated getting a ground ball. She can bend over, just not lifting weights on the way back up. She said that her demonstrating that she can, in fact, field grounders pissed him off. She said that he told her several times that what the doctors told her "doesn't make sense" and that she needed to do this.
DD is usually pretty strong willed, and holds her ground, but she said that he was on her so much and kept coming back to her repeatedly until she gave in and did all the exercises. I am actually a little disappointed in her that she relented. Here is the thing.......this guy has been around DD and coached since they were 8-9 years old. Has always been a stand up guy, and I consider him to be a friend. Why would someone like this not take her long term health into consideration? He KNOWS about her surgery and the fact that she was out for an entire year.
So here is the delimma....Again I know this guy. Haven't hung out together or anything, but have been around him occasionally for 6 years or so. DD fears me talking to him, that he will take it out on her and be harder on her. I must admit that I am a little pissed that a grown man would basically bully her into doing something that she should not. However I believe that I can have a civil conversation. Should I go and request a meeting, or let it go and see how practices go next week?
What would you all do if it was your DD??
EDIT to add....in fairness I have not heard his side of this exchange. My dd is not usually one to exaggerate things, but she is a 15 year old girl, so I am keeping that in mind.
Fast forward to yesterday. Second practice. Strength conditioning practice. Translated to: weight lifting.
Good news...dd can be a softball player. Bad news....DD will NEVER be a weight lifter. Three rods in her back, and 18 screws directly into her spine. Doctors, several PT docs, all said weight lifting is a no go. High school coach is having the girls do squats, straight leg dead lifts, and overhead presses. All three of those exercises put huge amounts of strain on the spine. She tells coach she can't do those things. Coach starts giving her a hard time about not wanting to work, and wasting time being there, and quote from coach (according to DD) "well you are here, so you need to do something" and "if you are not suppose to bend over at the waiste, how are you gonna field a ground ball" DD then demonstrated bending her legs, and back and simulated getting a ground ball. She can bend over, just not lifting weights on the way back up. She said that her demonstrating that she can, in fact, field grounders pissed him off. She said that he told her several times that what the doctors told her "doesn't make sense" and that she needed to do this.
DD is usually pretty strong willed, and holds her ground, but she said that he was on her so much and kept coming back to her repeatedly until she gave in and did all the exercises. I am actually a little disappointed in her that she relented. Here is the thing.......this guy has been around DD and coached since they were 8-9 years old. Has always been a stand up guy, and I consider him to be a friend. Why would someone like this not take her long term health into consideration? He KNOWS about her surgery and the fact that she was out for an entire year.
So here is the delimma....Again I know this guy. Haven't hung out together or anything, but have been around him occasionally for 6 years or so. DD fears me talking to him, that he will take it out on her and be harder on her. I must admit that I am a little pissed that a grown man would basically bully her into doing something that she should not. However I believe that I can have a civil conversation. Should I go and request a meeting, or let it go and see how practices go next week?
What would you all do if it was your DD??
EDIT to add....in fairness I have not heard his side of this exchange. My dd is not usually one to exaggerate things, but she is a 15 year old girl, so I am keeping that in mind.
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