Rec Parents!!! Need I say more???

[BuckeyeGuy]

I wonder if the expectations were set properly at the start of the season? My rec parents' meeting always includes what I expect from the girls and the parents, and I keep it simple:

Girls: 100% effort 100% of the time
Consequences for less than 100%: less playing time, probably not at favorite position

Parents: cheer all the girls on both teams
Consequences for umpiring, coaching, being abusive/negative: banishment to the outfield, possible ejection from the park

I've yet to have a real problem with a parent (that could be due to having good parents, I'm not taking sole credit).

As rec commish, I would recommend getting with your division manager (and possibly your commish) to discuss the best way to approach the family.

 

[BT3100]

At 10U Travel the kids shouldn't try out... it's the parents who should interview
Now you're coaching REC that's a different story. I am coaching my DD's Major's REC team this year. I had a meeting with the parents in the beginning of the year to cover expectations. Then I asked each kid what position they wanted to play. 5 girls said they wanted to pitch. My DD is a 12U TB pitcher. They saw her pitch and then said "no thanks".. That's not what I wanted. I asked them all to try to pitch as we needed at least 3 arms for the games. I found two girls who, if they committed, could be excellent pitchers. I told the other parents the absolute truth. One parent asked me what her kid needed to do pitch. I asked her if she wanted me to tell her what she wanted to hear or needed to hear. She said tell me what I need to hear. I explained that her DD does not have the arm strength to get the ball over the plate. Then I asked her "do you see that" then I just wait... I enjoy the silence... the next person to speak loses.. and I wait.... then she says "yes I see that"... Now we have a break through. I explain to her that I know what it takes to ready a girl for the circle. If her DD wants to get in the circle we can develop a plan... and this plan involves you, as the parent to sit on a bucket each day and help her get better. I asked "are you prepared to do that"? She said and I am quoting "Kayla plays travel soccer and does not have time to practice pitching every day". I then asked her "what is her second choice of positions"?

Everyone want's to harvest, but very few want to plow!

 

[softball11]

My dd was a pitcher on a 10u rec last year and the biggest problem was my wife and her rude comments toward the coach while sitting with other parents. She expected the coach to pitch my dd all game long when it was pointless after just three innings tips. We'd be ahead by 10-20 runs and leaving her in would be shameful so the coach would allow whoever wanted to pitch the chance to pitch while our kid sat. It made sense to me and my dd but my wife embarrassed us so bad then wonders why she feels other moms don't like our dd. I helped coach in a very small capacity so after the game I'd get the third degree for her coming out. Thank god my wife only went to about half the games. She failed to realize there were 12 other kids on the team. This year we are in tb and Ive made a startling discovery. With no parents present my dd plays better and enjoys herself more so for practice I go play with the GSD and games I sit out in left field. Dd really enjoys those 5 days a week 2.5 hour practices from the little I see from a distance. A GSD(german shepherd dog) is wanting my attention every minute of that 2-2.5 hours and makes a great replacement for the dd(little buddy) so I can allow her to grow on her own without my opinions and interference. A GSD would sure make a great outfielder.

 

[Sparky Guy]

The only thing worse are the 10u TB parents. They feel since they're paying a bunch of money more than what they would be paying in their local rec league it gives them the right to be even more vocal to/about the coaching and where/how much their kid should play.

Nope... The worst are 12U travel parents. They start to think they know something.

 

[dgfred]

My biggest problem with our 10U team is getting the girls there on time. It is so hard to tell them important things when they are dribbling in to practice. I try to get our coach to put the girls showing up late for games at the bottom of the order as a sort of punishment... but she still tends to put the better players at the top of the order whether they were at practice or not (or late).

By the time practice really gets going we have waisted about 20-30 minutes of it usually. Really hurts IMO.

 

[Jojo]

My biggest problem with our 10U team is getting the girls there on time. It is so hard to tell them important things when they are dribbling in to practice. I try to get our coach to put the girls showing up late for games at the bottom of the order as a sort of punishment... but she still tends to put the better players at the top of the order whether they were at practice or not (or late).

By the time practice really gets going we have waisted about 20-30 minutes of it usually. Really hurts IMO.

I was just thinking about this the other day, my local league is notorious for everyone showing up late.
I was raised if you weren't 15 minutes you were late.

So I was thinking, about maybe making the parent of the late player pay 50cents or a dollar for every minute late their DD was, and using that money for the end of the team party. Let the lateys pay for the party.

 

[RetiredCoach]

I've not found anyway to get rec players on time because it is actually their parents who are at fault. With "A" team players I've had no issue. They are (and their parents are) dedicated enough to be there early and ready.

 

[Eric F]

My biggest problem with our 10U team is getting the girls there on time. It is so hard to tell them important things when they are dribbling in to practice. I try to get our coach to put the girls showing up late for games at the bottom of the order as a sort of punishment... but she still tends to put the better players at the top of the order whether they were at practice or not (or late).

By the time practice really gets going we have waisted about 20-30 minutes of it usually. Really hurts IMO.

In my experience, this is par for the course in rec ball...at all ages. I try to let parents know what to expect right from the start, and reinforce it throughout the season, but people are going to do what they do.

 

[Strike2]

In my experience, this is par for the course in rec ball...at all ages. I try to let parents know what to expect right from the start, and reinforce it throughout the season, but people are going to do what they do.

Is true, but fortunately, the players who are more skilled and motivated are also the ones who tend to get there on / ahead of time. Everything else sorts itself out.

 

[canyonjoe]

The difference in the top 4 of any team and the bottom 4 is that the top 4 are always on time if not early and it kills them to miss a practice. The exact opposite for the bottom 4.

On the parent subject I still contend that other relatives at the game are worse than any parents. The expect them to be major league players.