Worst weekend ever

[fivepotsogold]

OK ... team actually did OK ... came in 2nd.

My DD had the worst pitching weekend she has EVER had ... she literally hasn't had this "Off" of a day in two years.
... she did come home after three games feeling awful (sick) yesterday .. pitched not so good and added team errors ... we went one win (my DD pitched this game and some of #3) two ties
(all games were within one run for all teams so very closely matched group)

Today she did hit a perfect line shot to move a runner to 3rd that ultimately scored to win game 1 in the bottom of the 7th. So no all bad.

Pitching in the final was BRUTAL .. she absolutely felt awful .. she could not find the plate ... ump even felt sorry for her and gave her a couple of "gifts" ...
Finally took her out in the 4th ... pitching didn't help but 6 errors also contributed but 8 run mercy in the 5th.

Very odd that they can be near perfect in one game and two hours later look like they never been on a field!

ANYWAY: Six Million $$$$ question, how do you handle this as a parent ???She is 14U, 9th grade.

(she did not practice much this past week so I'm thinking that may have been a bit if a factor)
(part of the age and she as sick but don't want to let her off the hook, but don't want to be too hard, either)

 

[SoftSocDad]

Meh, no big deal. It's easy to fall into a mini-slump when you're not feeling 100%, and sometimes an error can take the wind out of a team's sail, leading to errors by other players.

If there was a mistake because she didn't know the right play to make in a situation, talk about it. But if she committed an error on a play that she makes 98 times out of 100, don't even mention it.

She was sick and went out and left everything she had on the field in a virtually meaningless fall tournament. As a parent, you've got a lot to be proud of.

 

[Screwball]

Let her completely off the hook. Don't mention it unless she does. Move on.

 

[starsnuffer]

Your daughter was out playing softball with a bunch of other girls who were out having fun playing softball. If that's your worst weekend ever, you have a hell of a life, congratulations.

How do you handle it as a parent? Be glad she's able to go out and play softball, be thankful for the time you have, and remember that it is just a game.

If you want to be "softball focused" as to how you handle it, remember that nothing she does at 14 whilst playing softball insofar as accomplishments goes means anything. If she learned from the experience, then she had a good softball weekend. It's all about recognizing what she needs to work on, improving, and looking forward. I'm sure her coach said it a few times this weekend, "Forget that last play, focus on this next pitch".

-W

 

[sluggers]

ANYWAY: Six Million $$$$ question, how do you handle this as a parent ???

The hardest of dealing with losing is to get through the emotional part and get to the mental part. It is very, very difficult to do.

What did she fail to do on each pitch? What was the problem?

You are there to provide feedback to your DD on her pitching-- "You were rushing your pre-motion. You failed to throw your drop enough. Your follow through was messed up. You were on your front foot."

You've got to give her something concrete. She has to know (a) the problem and (b) that she can fix it.

As for yourself, my advice is perhaps a little coarse, but here it is anyway:

Get used to losing. You are going to lose more games than you win no matter what your win-loss record is. My DD#3's team went 115-10 in 4 years of college ball. Guess what? She and I remember each of the 10 losses in great detail, but we can only recall 6 victories in any kind of detail.

 

[Wookie]

Leave her alone - she already feels bad enough from her play and her illness. Also, try to remember everything bad you did when you played when you were 14. Can't? That's the point - so will she in a few days. Yeah, she'll remember that she didn't practice, lost focus, whatever, but the point is, those are fixable mistakes that don't need too much reflection. If she' starts worrying about that one pitch to this one batter in this one inning of that one game, it will eat at her to the point that everything else falls apart as well.

 

[obbay]

If you think it was a bad weekend, I imagine it was worse for her.
let it go. Good for her for being a trooper.

 

[PAcoach]

Something that has served me well the past couple years is this. On the way home from a pratice or a Tournament, i try and stay clear of much conversation of softball itself. if she had a bad practice or game, i certainly don't have to tell her, she already knows it. Maybe a day or 2 after, we might have a discussion on anything mechanical that i saw wrong, but mostly, i focus on all positives. As an example, if were on the way home and she said, man i struck out 4 of 6 times, i would say, yes, but man the one ball you hit was blistered in the gap and you got 2 RBI'S that help win the 2nd game.......

 

[fivepotsogold]

worst week

It was kind of a "shock" as my DD has been incredibly consistent for the last two years .. her off days were two-three walks, not six. She didn't make any fielding errors.
First tournament at 43 feet .. don't think that was a factor.

I didn't say too much to her ... took video Sat and the first thing she spotted on her own Sat night was that she was pulling/holding back arm instead of following through on pitches .. also discussed not staying closed long enough ...
The team we played Sunday had 15 year olds (technically still 14U) playing, great hitting team. We have a '98, a '97, the rest '96's.
All happy about coming in Second.

Today is a rest day .. no more Tournaments until Dec in NY .. helping out a 16U team this weekend but playing field not pitching. Just a fun scrimmage .. a friend from her 14U team going with her so they are happy about going together.

She did say she should have practiced more ... and I did make sure I was proud of the hit that was instrumental in game 1 win Sunday (not hitting great and it was a hard hit perfectly timed great location hit when the team needed it).

We are OK, no one got yelled at ...
... she kept looking at me from the mound, I'm not one to yell or say too much ..just told her to stay open and don't worry about it, doing fine, etc .....

 

[fivepotsogold]

meant not staying open long enough ...closing too soon ..