What is going on here? DIII daughter's heart is breaking

[kjmpa]

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[CoachKevin]

I have to admit... I am totally lost at what you are getting at. Is the .409 your DD? Who is starting over her?

 

[CLM265]

409, probably not the cleaner or the Beach Boys so I'm guessing it's his DD. Good stats all around.

 

[CoogansBluff]

.409 is a great kid - sophomore, does everything the coaches ask, no sass, amazing outfielder with great arm - team player. Has support of her teammates and their parents. If the parents weren't coming up to me asking me what was going on I wouldn't have this huge knot in my stomach. They want her in over their own kid.

Why do you believe the head coach is choosing others players over her?

 

[djcarter1966]

Best path short term is almost always to keep your head down practice hard and be ready when called upon. There is absolutely no way of telling what might be impacting coach's decision.

On the other hand I would hope DD has a good enough relationship with coach that she could ask, in a PC way, "just let me know what area I can improve on to earn more playing time", maybe it's an assistant she goes to or maybe the hitting coach? she can ask "do you think HC wants me to focus more on power or RBIs or OBP what is it we (hitting coach and her) can work on to improve my chances to play more" or position coach "do I need to focus more on positioning, better decision making, improved accuracy with throws to earn more playing time". I don't think any coach will look negatively on a player that say "what can I do to get better" just make 100% sure it does not come out as "I want more playing time because I am better at X and better than player Y"...that sounds like whining

 

[SoCalASABlue]

I know exactly where the OP is coming from. DD rode the pine and was expected to steal opposing PC's signs for about the first 20 games. This despite her participating in all workouts, weights, and following the rules while other underage players were being busted for booze in their dorms, skipping workouts and weights, etc.

Coach eventually told her she doesn't play freshmen. Not what we were sold in the pre-commitment visit. Transfers brought in got immediate playing time - until the errors and non-hitting caught up with them. Over the past 6 weeks or so, DD has been pitching and playing as the DP when not pitching. The increased playing time is probably because the team is on the outside looking in for post-season play after winning the conference last year.

 

[SoCalASABlue]

On the other hand I would hope DD has a good enough relationship with coach that she could ask, in a PC way, "just let me know what area I can improve on to earn more playing time", maybe it's an assistant she goes to or maybe the hitting coach? she can ask "do you think HC wants me to focus more on power or RBIs or OBP what is it we (hitting coach and her) can work on to improve my chances to play more" or position coach "do I need to focus more on positioning, better decision making, improved accuracy with throws to earn more playing time". I don't think any coach will look negatively on a player that say "what can I do to get better"

Maybe where you are...immediate benching on DD's team...coach flat out told the team "don't ever come to me about playing time"...

 

[kjmpa]

Thanks everyone - she has talked to the coach and asked what she can do to improve. We don't believe in asking for more playing time and you couldn't ask for a more respectful player. She's an adult and this is her game. It's been a very confusing season and it's a great group of girls and parents, and coaches. Appreciate the time each has taken to reply.


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[djcarter1966]

Maybe where you are...immediate benching on DD's team...coach flat out told the team "don't ever come to me about playing time"...

That's why you ask "what can I do to improve". I never cared if anyone came to me and asked about where they could play, could they play more, etc. as long as it was respectful, sincere and not a constant irritant.

But you can ask any kid that has every played for me the question and I promise you everyone will answer the exact same way. What position did you play on Coach Carter's team..."wherever coach said" period end of statement, because I drilled it into their heads.

I am not afraid of explaining myself to a player or parent (up to about 14U) for that matter before hand, "this is what I look for, this is how I balance my lineup, etc....granted as a coach don't have to and if you ask me one too many times or with a bad attitude I made just tell you "pound sand, if you don't like it find another team" but once I post the lineup you don't get to ask any questions or whine or complain or do anything but go out there and play ball.

 

[kjmpa]

But you can ask any kid that has every played for me the question and I promise you everyone will answer the exact same way. What position did you play on Coach Carter's team..."wherever coach said" period end of statement, because I drilled it into their heads.

Yep - both my girls say "wherever you need me coach". When my 13 year old was asked, I think the coach was looking for something a little more specific .