Unofficial visit

[SoftballMom2]

Head coach of school near top of DD's list told her coach he is very interested and would like DD to come visit the school on a specific date..she's ecstatic. Its her first official unofficial.. I'm trying to keep her realistic but is there anything specific we should or should not be doing..I usually tell her to just be herself but not really sure what may occur other than DD seeing the school and facilities to see if she likes it? Any advice?

 

[JAD]

There are several threads on this subject with a number of good questions to ask during a visit. I would recommend reading those and making a list. Have your DD practice answer questions about herself, it would be even better if she could practice with an adult who is not a family member. A lot of kids get nervous and "clam up" when speaking with an adult they are not familiar with. Coaches realize players will be nervous, so her responses do not need to be perfect, just genuine. Most importantly let her do the talking - a lot of parents cannot help themselves but to jump into the conversation.

 

[riseball]

When on a visit, official or otherwise parents should be seen and not heard. Do not speak unless spoken to as there is probably nothing that you can say that will help your DD. But you can easily screw it up.

 

[SoftballMom2]

Thank you!! DD has worked with the Coach at a few clinics 1:1 so she should feel somewhat comfortable.We will go over the suggested questions, etc. Haha Riseball..no worries there..We parents definitely will be quietly in the background.

 

[CoogansBluff]

There's really nothing wrong w/ parents asking a few questions here and there. It's not taboo. But since so many parents fail to grasp their role (ie, it's the kid being recruited, not the parents), I can certainly appreciate the advice of silence.

 

[PA SB Dad]

When on a visit, official or otherwise parents should be seen and not heard. Do not speak unless spoken to as there is probably nothing that you can say that will help your DD. But you can easily screw it up.

We had one coach call after a player was in their office with their parent. The player was offered, and the mom spoke up and said they are going to another school in the morning to see what they will get there for comparison. Needless to say, the offer was rescinded.

I think pitchers are particularly susceptible to this, because in TB the good ones are highly sought after and are used to getting multiple offers and shopping for teams. Unless you are the next Finch, that is just not the attitude to go into a college coaches office with.

 

[happytobeme]

... Have your DD practice answer questions about herself...

Can any of those who have been through the process share some questions they have heard the coaches ask their DDs? I can think of some very basic ones, but would love to hear what the coaches are actually asking the girls to help her with thinking about what the answers might be. Thanks!

Happy

 

[JAD]

There's really nothing wrong w/ parents asking a few questions here and there. It's not taboo. But since so many parents fail to grasp their role (ie, it's the kid being recruited, not the parents), I can certainly appreciate the advice of silence.

Parents should engage in parts of the conversation....just avoid jumping in and answering questions directed to your DD. There are a lot of "helicopter" parents out there.....try not to be one of them!

 

[JAD]

Can any of those who have been through the process share some questions they have heard the coaches ask their DDs? I can think of some very basic ones, but would love to hear what the coaches are actually asking the girls to help her with thinking about what the answers might be. Thanks!

Think along the lines of a job interview.....
1) Tell me about yourself.
2) What area your strengths?
3) What are your weaknesses?
4) Why do you want to go here?
5) What are you looking for in a school?
6) Where else are you looking?
7) What do you want to study?
8) What are your strongest subjects in school?
9) What are your weakest subjects in school?
10) What is your proudest accomplishment?
11) Who was your favorite TB coach and why?

 

[Homalosa]

Can any of those who have been through the process share some questions they have heard the coaches ask their DDs? I can think of some very basic ones, but would love to hear what the coaches are actually asking the girls to help her with thinking about what the answers might be. Thanks!

Happy

My DD's future coach asked her two very important questions. The first was obviously, "Why are you interested in our school?" and the second, "do you think you can handle the weather here?" I think coach sees these questions as equally important because this school is covered in snow and ice December through February. A former student of mine who is currently playing football at Kansas State told me to ask my kids another important question while on a visit. He said to wait until the end of the visit and ask them simply, "do you see yourself here for four years?" We need to be prepared to listen to their answers and be willing to help them understand better and/or ask more questions from coaches and players if our kids are unable to answer the four year question.