Tears on the mound

[SBmom8992]

It was 10YO DD's turn to start pitching over the weekend. First inning 2 K's 2 walks then K to end the inning. Second inning she hits 2 batters, gives up 4 walks for 2 runs and then strikes out the side. Third inning she starts to intersperse hitting batters, striking them out, and giving up walks. After the eighth batter when she walked in another run I look at her and see her lip is quivering and she is getting really red in the cheeks. She is literally crying while she is pitching. She walks in another run after a full count. I didn't know whether to laugh or cry I felt so bad for her. I asked her if she wanted to come out of the game and she shook her head no. Next batter, lip still quivering, she strikes out to end the inning. She tells me after the inning is over she was upset that she was giving up walks (4 that inning). She played 3B for the remainder of the game since she and our other pitcher split each game 3 innings apiece.

She is so frustrated that she doesn't seem to have consistent control. She pitches faster in comparison to some of the girls in the league and some of the HBP are because the batter makes no attempt to get out of the way or they are on top of the plate as a RHP throwing to a RHB. She usually misses high or inside to RHB.

Ever been down this road? What advice did you give your DD?

 

[Amy in AZ.]

I would be surprised if there are any of us, that haven't been down this road. I had to sub for a coach a couple of weeks ago, and the 10U pitcher cried, when I pulled her.

But, it is all part of learning. I make certain that they aren't getting yelled at at home, for walks, etc. and i would pull her if she was crying in the circle. She can get hurt out there.

 

[YOCOACH]

The advice I gave to mine when she pitched was (edited shortened version) "It's your plate. If they are standing too close when you throw the ball, it's the batter's job to get out of the way. If they don't and they get hit by pitch, it's not your fault but theirs for not moving fast enough. If you're the batter, remember, it's your plate. If you're hit by pitch, just remember to move faster out of the way next time. Being hit by pitch is part of the game. There will come a time and place when you will take the hit intentionally. But this is not that time nor place. You're still a few years away."

As for the walks and lack of consistency, I just told DD that it takes plenty of time, practice and innings to become a good pitcher. It takes thousands of hours of practice and 1000's of innings to become a great one. Then I went into the mental aspect of pitching.

 

[SBmom8992]

I'll admit that I was kind of shocked when I looked at her and saw she was getting upset. The HC had gone out to the mound the previous inning and called in the entire infield to slow down the game since DD seemed to be rushing inbetween pitches. If the HC visited the mound again, DD would have to be pulled and our second pitcher hadn't yet been warmed up. She started getting upset after the 8th batter and since we have a 10 batter max per inning rule, we knew there were only 2 more batters she would need to get through. The tears only started to fall once she got into the dugout but she was definitely upset those last 2 batters.

Thankfully she was able to finish the inning on a positive note by striking out batter #10 but if/when this happens again, I'll definitely keep your advice in mind if I see her starting to lose her composure. Definitely one of the harder positions to be in as a parent coach (first time this season and most likely last time).

 

[InsidePitch]

DD started crying one inning after walking in a couple of runs. I walked out to the circle and asked why are you crying. She replied they are laughing at me. I said no honey they are laughing because they are happy. (Thinking...Happy they are beating the crap out of us.)

It takes a certain psychological make up to stand in the circle and continue on when the wheels appear to be falling off and not all kids have that. DD could stand losing but not the idea of ridicule so she moved to the other side of the plate.

 

[sluggers]

I gotta go with Out in Left Field on this...I never let a kid "self-destruct" on the mound. I would let them go only "so far". When they started getting frustrated, I would take them out before they self-destructed. I usually put a limit on it, like "three walks an inning". So, when they gave up the third walk, they would come out.

In practice, I had one pitcher (my DD) who was a flame thrower, but could be very, very wild. I had another pitcher who could throw strikes all day long, although she was slow.

So, my DD would go in and pitch as long as she could. When she got wild, I brought in the other girl. After a couple of innings, my DD would go back in.

I never made a big deal out of it. Just, "You'll get 'em next time. Keep on throwing hard."

 

[CoachAl]

tough but she will get through it!

I know this can be incredibly tought to watch, but you have to let your DD, her coach and her team work through it together. 10u pitchers who are stepping into the circle for the first time have it rough and the longer I've coached, the more respect I have for these kids for what they do!

How this is handled from a coaching perspective depends on the situation. At 10u, I might be inclined to let her stay out there and work through it as best as she can. Now, if she has a total meltdown that is pretty easy to see then of course you remove her from the game and talk to her (keeping everything postitive!). Some coaches will also handle this situation differently if it's league vs. pool play vs. bracket play etc. But, overall at 10u they need to be playing and learning.

I'm going to take a wild guess that if we fast forward two or three seasons, this young lady will be a dominant and confident presence in the circle and she will look back on stuff like this and laugh about it!

 

[JJsqueeze]

I'm going to take a wild guess that if we fast forward two or three seasons, this young lady will be a dominant and confident presence in the circle and she will look back on stuff like this and laugh about it!

If she is given the proper tools to handle her emotions and the proper instruction on the importance of composure in the circle. Part of every pitcher's training should be focus and emotional control. They need to develop a short memory and a thick skin.

 

[BoardMember]

The threat of pepper spray to the face if she doesn't stop balling on the mound usually works on a 10 year old. Oh wait....This isn't the child abuse forum.......

IMHO..........Call time.......Go speak with her and tell her why she needs to focus on the task at hand and pull it together.

THEN if she can't, take her out and let her cool down and see that the world still turns even is she hits/walks every batter in the line up.......3 times..........

IOW........Give her a chance to pull it together on her own.......And if she can't........Consider that she is 10 and hasn't learned that skill yet.........Be the adult and save her from herself at the moment so she doesn't decide to measure the fun by that moment in time.........

No different from any other time the 10yo needs some help growing up.........The 14yo need less help. And the 16yo needs no help.........

 

[SBmom8992]

Thanks BM (BTW I'm still trying to digest your I/R in the Classroom thread. I wouldn't advise anyone to try to read it on an iPhone.)
In our league, two trips to the mound = removing the pitcher. We kept her in there because no matter the outcome, there were only 2 more batters to face since we have the 10 batters max per inning rule (rec league). I gave her the option to have her pulled and she said she wanted to ride it out. I give her credit for that. This was the first time I had ever seen her rattled on the mound, but I guess in the back of my mind I knew it was bound to happen. She's a tough kid - very hard on herself but with the crazy ability to bounce back after having a 60 second pity party. She is always the most engaged kid out there cheering on our other pitcher and telling her teammates to focus on the game instead of worrying about getting ice cream afterwards. She's a real leader and I'm very proud of her.