Newly ticked-off parent in need of Slugger, et al

[Jillsdad]

Ken I would say all the girls on the team are about equal - there are no great players and no average players - they are all good. I would say as objectively as I can be that my DD is the 3rd-5th best in every category.

 

[quincy]

I have heard several suggestions about switching teams and moving on. Question: After writing a not-insignificant check for the season how can I leave after one tournament? Would you suggest I ask for a refund? Because I would feel quite awkward asking for one.

That was not one of my suggestions. Our family did not particularly enjoy last spring season, survived is a better word. Nothing to do with DD’s safety so switching Teams was not an option. She might have been able to push us towards quitting for the year but would have been a hard sell, no way would she have been allowed to switch Teams.

Our entire family learned something last year that we are taking into this new season.

 

[Jillsdad]

Well I reached out to the coach in an email and he explained nicely how playing time is allocated in tournaments and I thanked him kindly for his reply. Now we will see how it plays out. Thanks to everyone for their advice and support.

 

[chinamigarden]

I'm curious about what he said.

 

[Jillsdad]

Basically that in pool play they try to get all girls 2 1/2 games or 6 at bats and then based on performance they set the lineup for elimination games. I told him ok great thanks for the explanation.

 

[Coach-n-Dad]

DD absolutely wants to improve, practices hard and wants to be pushed. The thing maybe I do not grasp is this: She didn't try out for this team - they came to her. Once a kid makes a travel team, to me that means the coaches think the kid is good enough to play, and WILL in fact play.

I appreciate your responses.

DD had a similar experience at a much higher level. Playing 16U and the 18Gold coach from the same organization recruited her for the following season. Mom and I weren't sure she was ready but decided to let her do it, figuring the same thing as you figured "coach thinks she's good enough for that level, surely she's going to play!"

We learned a couple of things that season:
1) there is a difference between equal playing time and equal opportunity. (all pitchers got the same amount of starts, the ones that performed stayed in, the ones that didn't were pulled)
2) some coaches still play "daddy ball" at the Gold level, even if they don't have a kid on the team.

It was a tough season for DD, but in the long term she learned some hard lessons and is now a much better athlete/teammate/pitcher because of it.

 

[absdad]

A couple of months ago DD attended a clinic and a coach (and dad) asked her to join his 12U travel team after seeing her pitch. DD, who had only played rec ball, thought - great idea. So after paying dues and attending a dozen practices and a scrimmage we had first tourney this weekend. Team has 3 other pitchers, 2 of them are very good, but that is not a problem for DD as she will gladly play anywhere.

Ok so now after 6 games she has pitched 2 innings (1 hit, 1 run) batted last in every game she has played in and sat out 3 games completely. She DHed in one of the games she played, so she has been in the field maybe 8 innings.

Now granted there are 13 girls on the team, and a solid argument can be made that DD is NOT the best hitter and fielder on the team. Naturally, the coaches daughters bat 2nd and 3rd and haven't sat out an inning.

DD, who loved the game 2 months ago now has this "what the heck am I doing this for?" look on her face, and I am tying to smile and remain positive, though I am starting to wonder whether they just needed our check.

Any and all advice is most welcome.

Sounds like you and your DD made an honest "new to travel ball" mistake. By that I mean, the same mistakes *I* made as a "new to travel ball" parent, and the same mistakes many (if not most) other parents make. ASK QUESTIONS! LOTS AND LOTS of questions. Research and research some more, then ask other people. I honestly feel for you because I think most parents getting into this racket get into a bad situation by a combination of not knowing what to ask/look out for, and bad coaches. Probably if your DD is new to the sport, there are certain types of teams that would better suit her. By that I don't mean "C" teams that aren't competitive. Some coaches have a different philosophy on coaching/teams/playing. A coach who keeps the roster down to 10 maybe 11 players, who puts playing time and development above trophies. The first year of travel ball should be about getting used to the irregularities, and developing the girls skills and abilities. With 4 pitchers and 13 players, there is no room for development for anyone. The first year or two of travel ball should be about development.

 

[coachtucc]

My 12U travel team just picked up a 3rd pitcher and we told the dad that when she will start by being the 3rd pitcher and that she could move up based on how she performs or based on how the other two perform. I already see her being my number two now and later my number one but didn't tell her or the dad that so that she sould work hard. She will also get PT at 1B especially since I do not have a 1B right now!

 

[coachtucc]

Also (and this is just me) my tavel team is in a league and we use the league games to try different things and give the girls more playing time. I bat 12 in these games ( I have 14 girls) and move them around every 2 innings to different positions. All the girls get a good amount of time in these games. They and the parenst know that it is somewhat different in tournaments.

 

[quincy]

different positions.

Still have mixed feelings about this, I would classify DD as a utility player. I would like her to settle down into 1 infield and 1 outfield position, not important enough to worry about but it would be nice.