need to vent/confused about coaches true motives

[soonerfan1966]

wife told me not to read coaches facebook page but i didnt listen. coach doesnt enter our team in memorial weekend tournament(reasons unknown) but emails one of the better teams entered and asks if her two kids could play on their team. day before the tournament she sends a text saying that if any of the kids want to play this weekend there are some teams (not the good teams) that need some players and she will get them on these teams. back to the facebook, apparently that team wins the tournament and she talks about how these trophies are what its all about and the only thing that would have been better was if it could have been our team. am i wrong in thinking something is just not right about this(i'm a our team first type person). having had a son and daughter play(now we are talking about my granddaughter) i dont want her to deal with what they had to with some of their coaches. sorry for the rant, but was wondering what the communities opinion is.

 

[moe]

For it to be that blatent, there is something a foot. Team money running low, low committal, by-laws say no tourneys on holidays...could be anything. This is one of those where there has to something going on. Something so simple as your primary pitcher cant play could scrap a tourney.

 

[Lenski]

Why don't you ask the coach? Her reasons for not playing in a tourney this weekend might be valid. She did say she wishes it was her team.......

 

[GOINGDEEP]

Memorial Day, 4th of July, Labor Day, were always big pick up tourneys around here. That could mean either we picked up enough to play, or some of our girls went to play for another team. We tried to discuss vacation schedules at the beginning of the season so we would be prepared as a team to go in one direction ( play/pick up ).

As far as who goes where? That gets a little more complicated than just Sally went to go play for the Tigers. It greatly depends on the position NEEDED by the team picking up. If Sally is a catcher, team A already has 3 catchers, I'd try to find a team B who only has 1. Head coaches swap their DD's between other teams to kinda build a relationship with the other coach. ( hey,pick up my kid this time, and I'll return the favor in the future ) Lastly, the better athletes are always the most desired and usually pick up easier with the better teams.

Facebook. That's the new politics of diamond game. As long as the post was just a simple, "we played at ______ with the _______ team and came in first, thanks coach ______ for the opportunity to play with y'all, wish our own team could have been there"...........I see nothing wrong with it. Our girls/parents/coaches use to post pics of their pick up games, whether they came in 1st, 3rd, or 5th.

 

[soonerfan1966]

moe-dont think its a money issue as she never mentioned the tournament (have never hesitated to ask for money before), onlly 1 maybe 2 girls have missed 1 game this year(very dedicated players/parents), 7 of the 8 teams entered were from our league, and its coach pitch.

lenski-it will come to that but im very hesitant to say anything as im trying to keep my mouth shut and let our granddaughter just play ball. im trying to balance "this is the coaches team" versus "this is my granddaughter" and she aint going through what my son and daughter did. hope i explained that well.

 

[sluggers]

It all depends upon the communication by the coach with the team and their expectations.

Many high schools are still playing in the post-season championship tournaments, so a lot of players are missing. And, in most states, if their HS team is still playing, the kids can't play on a TB team.

Additionally, many families like to spend "the last holiday" before the softball season with their extended families and friends.

If a coach says from the beginning, "We are not playing over the Memorial Day weekend. You can find a team, go away, or watch cartoons that weekend, but we are not playing," I don't see a problem.

 

[chinamigarden]

Coaches like a break from coaching at times. Maybe he wanted to just be the parent watching his own kid play. Without having all the BS of coaching a tourney. What I don't quite understand is how this situation affects you or your DGD even one tiny bit.

 

[soonerfan1966]

chinamigarden i agree coaches need a break, but when a coach tells the other team they will help coach or pitch, im gonna wonder about motives(which is why i asked the community). maybe you've never had a coach play "daddyball" with a team, i have and im getting concerned this could be turning into a case of it. how does it not affect my dgd, a coach(whether they like it or not) or looked up to by players. is it the goal to teach them that only big trophies matter or teach them that teamwork, loyalty, trust are what matters. does it affect me, NO, but it does affect my granddaughter.

 

[GOINGDEEP]

Biggest piece of this puzzle, that you haven't offered, is why your GDD's team didn't play that weekend.

 

[chinamigarden]

chinamigarden i agree coaches need a break, but when a coach tells the other team they will help coach or pitch, im gonna wonder about motives(which is why i asked the community). maybe you've never had a coach play "daddyball" with a team, i have and im getting concerned this could be turning into a case of it. how does it not affect my dgd, a coach(whether they like it or not) or looked up to by players. is it the goal to teach them that only big trophies matter or teach them that teamwork, loyalty, trust are what matters. does it affect me, NO, but it does affect my granddaughter.

How does this event affect your granddaughter? With out trying to figure out a motive or a reason for what happened. Exactly how does what happened affect her? I just don't see a conflict in what you wrote. Do you expect the coach to be in your service every single weekend of the year?