Maybe I'm confused?

[Crab]

A coaches job is to teach each the proper fundamentals of fielding throwing hitting and running. In addition the proper fundamentals that are unique to each position. This is just basic stuff that needs to be taught. There is a lot more.along the way you try to deal with each player in a positive manner so that each kid can be as confident as possible. If this environment does not exist then leave. Too many options available to player than to be involved in a bad environment. With all this being said, the coach has the responsibility to put players on the field that give the team the best chance to win. The player has got to do the job. When there is competition for a job you step up to the challenge not back down. That's sports and life. Go home with your kid. Get back to the basics of fielding and throwing. You make errors due to fundamental issues. Fix em. Do that and I bet she gets back in the lineup. It is not the coaches fault. Get back to work. Your meeting is likely to make it worse. Your DD has to earn that job back and all will be right with the world and her confidence will come back. If she or you can't embrace that challenge then likely can forget high school ball and for sure college. Those programs are looking for competitors

 

[Country Boy]

I'm not going to defend myself and my actions. I have been nothing but supportive and encouraging to DD; there have been times where I have had to ask her where her head was when this or that happened. But no, I don't think I caused anxiety. She has been very smooth in the last year SINCE I have backed off. What I will say is that the drills are not repetitive LONG enough, and that they focus on situations more than anything. They only have practice once a week...she has hitting/pitching M/W/Thurs; other days we practice when we can on our own. I do think that when they brought on the new 3B (coincides with her decline), she went downhill.

Anyway, I'm sticking my neck out there now...I have really never had to "confront" the coaches about anything before. I just accepted it for what it was. But now, for the first time, I have requested a meeting with them, and I am completely at a loss for how to start it or what to say without putting anyone on the defense. I don't want to be accusatory, and I completely understand the "for the team" thing. However, my dd is 14 (8th grade), and she is trying to prep for HS ball as well as college ball. Going through these motions doesn't seem to be "helping" her but rathering making her struggle mentally, I guess. Anyway, I guess I'll be going to this meeting to explain what DD has said to me. Yes, I want to defend her, but I also want constructive criticism, and I want to know what we (coaches AND myself) can do to help her get there...even if it means she has to do it on her own (I need to hear this). Having never been in a sport, I have no clue how to parent an athlete...except to try to be positive and supportive.

On a sidenote, I am trying not to take offense, but shortly after I emailed the request to meet, one of the coaches posted on her FB wall: "Coaching: Making decisions based on what you believe to be the best for the "team", yet knowing, understanding and accepting that complaints and disapproval will be waiting for you, whether your team loses OR wins. Happy Monday. =\"

Nice, huh? Sounds like they are already going to be defensive.

Probably too late, but my advice would be go to the meeting prepared to listen not talk. Talking to the coaches will solve little. Listening to what they have to say is invaluable.

A long time ago, I was told to ask Blue what he saw, when I had a difference in opinion over a call. Seems to work better than yelling at him (her). I would advise you spend your time listening rather than talking.

Coaching: Making decisions based on what you believe to be the best for the "team", yet knowing, understanding and accepting that the most knowledgeable people are in the stands anxiously waiting to criticize your every move. My take on the phrase.

 

[lstorie1971]

One time a parent approached me and asked why "Suzie was taken out of the game." I said "Because she asked to come out." Parents sometimes don't know the whole story. I hope this works out for the best for you. Does your DD want you to talk to the coach? I think that is important to find out, before the meeting.

I was going to ask the same thing. I know that my daughter would be mortified if I approached the coach about her without first having her consent.

 

[BaldNBeautiful]

Just playing Devil's (or Coach's advocate) with this, and pardon my language, but.....maybe she could/should focus on being the best damn outfielder on the team.
IMHO that would go further with the coaches, her team-mates, and with her own confidence than Dad having a meeting with the coaches.
This whole thing could actually be an opportunity rather than a demotion.
Not trying to be condescending, crass, or sound like a know it all, with this....

 

[sluggers]

First, I was never shy about pulling a girl. On the other hand, everyone got a second chance...and a third and a fourth and so on. IMHO, 14U (and even 16U) is too early to "fire" a girl and "give" the position to another girl.

Second, is your DD fast? If so, if I were you, I would grab the opportunity and work on making her an exceptional outfielder.

As to dealing with the coach, you should go talk to him and see if your DD is going to get another shot at 3B. If he says "No", then you have to really work on making her a good outfielder.

As to the mental part, I would have to see her play. My guess is that she isn't going over in her head what to do with the ball before the pitch.

 

[29dad]

How did the meeting go? Was the coach receptive or defensive? I certainly defend her right to make whatever changes she thinks is best, but I also think it's important for coaches to communicate. I know DD's coach from last year was very big on individual meetings with the players. Anyway, I hope the meeting went well.

 

[maksoftball]

How did the meeting go? Was the coach receptive or defensive? I certainly defend her right to make whatever changes she thinks is best, but I also think it's important for coaches to communicate. I know DD's coach from last year was very big on individual meetings with the players. Anyway, I hope the meeting went well.

It went very well. So there you have it...all is good now.

 

[joeman39]

Why people think moving to the outfield is a punishment? I can't understand. Coaches and players have to put team first.

 

[Rmc1981]

Why people think moving to the outfield is a punishment? I can't understand. Coaches and players have to put team first.

I wonder this as well. Infielder misses a ball and it's a single. Outfielder misses a ball or it gets passed them and its multiple bases.

FTR, I've been a SS and 3B my entire life, still playing slow pitch today. I love the infield, but don't see outfield as a demotion.

 

[maksoftball]

It's all working out though...she is getting exposure in the outfield...