Importance of coaching

[chinamigarden]

It is absolutely accurate for my 11yo son and my 14yo daughter. It's also fairly prominent across the teams they play on. The boys go bonkers when they win a game, REGARDLESS what the game is, and that "high" stays with them for a while. Conversely, when they lose, they tend to get down and then carry that for a while. The coaching challenge is to allow that high to roll...and temper out the down times as quickly as possible. On the flip side, for most of the girls on my DD's team, it's often tough to tell after most games if they won or lost; and it is a very, very successful team. I would honestly say that for most of them, if they enjoyed themselves for a weekend tournament, the win/loss doesn't mean an awful lot the next day. Now, they all brag they won the State ASA tourney, but that's about it. What I take from it is as long as they are enjoying themselves, the success comes along with it. As long as, of course, they have the fundamentals and the skill to succeed.

I heard the quote from Candrea as well.

TR

You really beleive that girls only play when they are having fun?

I don't think the common Candrea quote is about having fun, "Boys have to play good to feel good, but girls have to feel good to play good" its about self esteem and confidence. Which to me is quite different then having fun.

 

[Arm and Hammer]

Its summed up in the following: "Boys have FUN when they are playing, girls only play when they are having FUN". A quote every FP coach should digest.

I have heard this before, a little different though: Boys need to play well to feel good, Girls need to feel good to play well. I think that may be a little more accurate, but while it seems a nice sentimentality I am not sure about its validity. One thing I do know is "most" all the girls I have ever coached seem to respond very well to consistent instruction tempered with encouragement and patience while holding them accountable to focus and hard work. There are also the few select ones that will respond better to a very firm and direct approach. These are usually the girls with a little “edgy” personality, and are frequently some of the better athletes, not always though.

 

[quincy]

DD runs all over the field and smiles a lot when the ball is not in play. When the ball is in play I am not sure what her face looks like. She has fun but is concentrating.

I know I am not disagreeing with anyone but just because girls need to have fun, my DD anyways, does not mean she is running around the field with a smile on her face.

 

[02Crush]

Arm and Hammer I found your and it made me smile. I have coached for a long time off and on. The most consistent time has been the past 5 years from ages 4-9. I have seen girls grow up in the sport so far. One person put it on her that they measured their success by those who signed up wanting to play for you again. I was blessed with more kids than spots after a couple of years. You will be too. Enjoy it. Spend time learning about each player. Spend time coaching them where they are not to what you think they need to know. I think there is nothing wrong feeling positive about your winning successes. Just do not worry when you lose and you are fine. I to had a similar story. We draft players to try and keep the team fair. Our park is a part of 6 parks in the system with teams. Our park fielded two teams last spring and when the other coach and I did evaluations we drafted based on requests and the talent seen. He ended up with a better team on paper with more A tier players. We had more C tier players. As coaches we were able to keep most all the requests in line. Bottom line...I jumped up and down at third in celebration of every hard effort by every player. I gave out game balls for offense and defense every game (by seasons end everyone got one for reaching some benchmark of growth or another). Bottom line...We went undefeated, Won the end of season tournament for the county and fill over half the all-stars slots for June and finished second b.c we chose to play kids around the field and not lock up positions. I was so happy in their success. Not for the wins but b/c a group of players of all skill levels came together and tried their best, focused and played hard. Their reward...A celebration raid on Dairy Queen for ice cream for all. You will continue to see these moments. I wish you well as you are making more of an impact on lives than you know. Continue praising them and being honest with them about mistakes without a harsh tone.

 

[Arm and Hammer]

Crush, thanks for the affirming remarks. You’re right about the most important thing being personal development, not only in softball skill, but more importantly by using the sport to build character, teach lessons that will equip them for life. It is my ultimate reward to see these young ladies develop and succeed in that way, knowing that I had just a little influence and that they will hopefully remember their experiences with fondness, reflect and look back with genuine appreciation and gratitude. It’s something bigger and more important than me, myself and I. Influencing lives for the better, makes life more rewarding, even if it does, at times, seem to be a thankless job.

 

[02Crush]

Arm and Hammer....There are far to few good adult male and female influences for our Daughters outside of just the parents. We need more so keep up the good work.