How do you do it???

[fastpitch5]

here's my situation - i manage both my son's and my dd's travel baseball and fastpitch teams. i started with the boy's team, and then started my dd's team a year later b/c she had a bozo coach and honestly got next to nothing out of being on the team. i was naive - i had no idea how big this would get or what is involved in running one, let alone, two competitive teams.

fast forward 4 years - we have two successful, strong teams. i've toyed with the idea of giving up the reigns b/c it's getting to be too much for me to manage. one of the perks of managing both teams is that i get final say on our scedules, and i have never missed a game. not being in the driver's seat, i'll lose this perk. and its important to me to be there (as it is for everyone i'm sure).

so has anyone else faced this issue? how did/do you handle it? or just how do you manage multiple kids going in different directions on an almost non-stop basis? im thinking we just have to accept the fact that we'll have to miss a few games here and there.

 

[fusionmom]

Unfortunately, you are exactly right. You are going to have to accept the fact that you'll have to miss a few games here and there unless you are willing to manage 'til the end! I know, because I've been there, done that. I have three kids playing ball at the same time (son in baseball and two daughters in fastpitch) and my husband is pitching/catching coach for oldest DD's fastpitch team. On top of that, both DD's are playing in the same tourneys many times. May sound great, but it seems like their games are always drawn for the same time! Our kids "get it" though and understand that we will be at each of their games as many times as possible. Somebody is ALWAYS at their games ~ just not always both of us or the same one!

 

[starsnuffer]

The best thing you can do for your kids is to not be there. It sounds strange, but it's the best way to let go, and the best way for your kids to learn how to act when Dad isn't around. Being a control freak, it's hard to do, but necessary. It's okay to miss games, it'll probably teach you more then if you were there.

-W

 

[SoftSocDad]

I'm a 'got to be there' dad, too, but when the sun finally sets on the career of whatever she's playing or doing at the time, my daughter will know that I made every human effort possible to attend as many of her games and performances as I could. The occasional miss can actually help a relationship grow.

 

[softball_chic_12]

im 15 and play softball all year long. this was my last year in the 14 & under league that my dad coaches. my brother who is 9 plays football and baseball. Dad misses my fall ball games. This coming year, he is still head coach for the 14 & under team, but won't be as hands on with the girls during practices. he will try to make it to my brother's games. plus my brother's league wants my dad to coach. He is also taking up as a coach for my travel team. So this is tough. and i'm sure my brother feels bad and left out that my dad isn't as involved in his sports like he is in mine. Its just i know dad feels so good, and young and like he's needed and wanted in softball. because he is. where as with the boys' sports around here, there is a long waiting list for coaching positions. So i don't know what dad is going to do, but he does miss games and that's just the way it has to be.

 

[coachtucc]

coaching HS softball in the spring and my son 8 year old baseball team is a challenge...I have a great little league director that helps me with scheduling so no games during the week are on the same day as my HS team and Saturday games are in the afternoon!! Helps to have good assts on my son's team that are also friends and they know I am zooming to get to all the games...by the way my Hs team plays 30 miles away from my little league team!!

 

[sluggers]

its important to me to be there

To whom? You or your kids? Have you considered that you might be stifling their growth as people?

Kids have to learn to do things without their parents. Parents have to learn to do things without their kids.

 

[Hollyrockartist]

Kids have to learn to do things without their parents. Parents have to learn to do things without their kids.

That's the gospel! Hard having to choose which games to attend for any of your own children! I have a horrible phobia which kept me from most of her away games the first year she played HS. She'd be riding off into the sunset and I'd be in a crumbled ball on the floor crying because I couldn't trick my brain into knowing it'd be okay to go. It was hard not going, but she understood. The experience made her more independant, which was what she needed!

Our 8yo son plays golf and basketball. He dabbled in baseball for a couple of seasons and didn't like it. For us, it was a blessing because his season with basketball doesn't interfere with DD's softball seasons. DD is good if both, one of or neither of us go. She has a strong personality and floats well on her own. Husband works 45 minutes away. Since HS games start at 4pm, he rarely gets to the field to see her play. I hate it for him because he has missed some of her best games in person.

Send a camcorder with someone who can film for you if you can't go. I have taken our's to many a game to capture the moments for my husband to see on "the big screen" the next day! Kind of fun, too, for DD to see herself on the tube!

 

[Amy in AZ.]

I have a parent of three of my students, that has 8 kids. They schedule what lessons they can back to back, like pitching, swimming, piano and violin. The dad is a veterinarian and the kids know that mom can't possibly be a 4 games at the same time. She does walk back and forth between diamonds and will leave a game in the middle of it, sometimes.

They are out of bed at 5:30 AM to start piano, swimming, etc.

Her kids are quite self sufficient. She said that her cell phone bill is $400.00 a month and the 2 youngest don't even have one, yet.

The difference with this family, is Sundays are family day. Nothing but church, dinner and reading. They make no exceptions and they don't even turn the cell phones on or watch tv.

 

[wild man]

I have done Two teams a couple of times. I am kind of a junkie BUT at some point I get so wrung out that I have found that I cannot give 100% to two teams. Both of the teams get less of me than one team would. But I am kind of beat up too so after 5 hours of practice a day Then a 12-14 hour day on the weekend if we have a road trip, I usually end up hardly able to move on Sunday.
You have to work as well I am guessing. I do admire anyone who takes on a task this big The kids need coaches that know whats going on. There is some real sound advice from the moms in particular. Take a long hard think about this you will most likley do the right thing.