Biting tongue at HS-run clinic

[Greenmonsters]

Since most of the posters have not played, of course they think players are bad coaches.

Look, I would not coach a team in soccer, never having played it. Ever seen a female coach a football team? (I know one but she played womens football.)

Perhaps if you worked your way up by being a volunteer assitant, maybe. I understand this need when no other person is available to coach, but I would be humble and not call D1 players bad coaches as a generalization, which happens here a lot.

Again, if the coaches were paid and the programs did more outreach (and more hospitable by not calling even D1 players bad coaches), former players would coach and build up their coaching resumes. But no one wants to give one a chance.

I just looked at the baseball coaches at the local high school. I just asked a travel baseball coach, who all happened to be young and no kids yet. Did you play? All said yes. One was handed the reins 2 years out of college by the previous veteran coach, so that tells you what was thought of him. He in turn, has other young assistants.

Here's a multiple choice test. Pick ALL the correct answers.

What makes a good coach? They.... a) have a clipboard and whistle b) were hired to coach c) have assistant coaches who agree with them d) have a successfull won/loss record e) have a poor won/loss record f) have/don't have certain body parts g) have played the game h) have not played the game i) played the game in college j) played the game at the D1 or higher level k) charge for private lessons l) have written a book m) have made a video n) have a website o) are yound p) are old q) are not young and not old r) are nice to everyone s) are not nice to everyone t) never raise their voice u) yell a lot v) have never coached before w) have 10+ years coaching experience x) have coached at lease 1 player who played at a higher level y) have never coached a player who played at a higher level z) none of the above.

PM me if you need the answer key.

 

[SoCalSoftballdad]

I actually have spoken to the coach about this. The coach told me that there is no attitude or disrespect from my DD. Only that she is a bit "resistant" to change her swing to the way the "coach" thinks she should be swinging.

I guess I am a little confused now, because you stated earlier that one of the contributing factors why your DD is on the JV team and not Varsity was due to her resistant to change as told to you by her coach. If you, as a parent, are having this conversation at all with the coach, that is not a good sign. If she is clearly one of the best players in MS than there must be other factors in place that are keeping your DD from playing Varsity.

I still stand by my suggestion to have your DD make the most of the situation and absolutley do not confront this coach, it will only make the situation worse. Remember, your distain and disapproval for this coach has a direct influence on your DDs behavior to this coach as well. Appreciate the fact that your DD is playing for her school and enjoys the game. That should be enough in MS.

 

[GOINGDEEP]

Here's a multiple choice test. Pick ALL the correct answers.

What makes a good coach? They.... a) have a clipboard and whistle b) were hired to coach c) have assistant coaches who agree with them d) have a successfull won/loss record e) have a poor won/loss record f) have/don't have certain body parts g) have played the game h) have not played the game i) played the game in college j) played the game at the D1 or higher level k) charge for private lessons l) have written a book m) have made a video n) have a website o) are yound p) are old q) are not young and not old r) are nice to everyone s) are not nice to everyone t) never raise their voice u) yell a lot v) have never coached before w) have 10+ years coaching experience x) have coached at lease 1 player who played at a higher level y) have never coached a player who played at a higher level z) none of the above.

PM me if you need the answer key.

When I first got out of college ball I still had the player mentality. I hadn't been "coached" in years, just really refreshers and going through the motions of years of training. I helped coach a rec T ball team, and buddy I was not ready mentally for that. I was 23 YO and guess I expected the little kids to have some clue of a ball and bat. Nope!!!

My patients were thin, I was still young and wild and didn't give them the attention they needed. I look back now and realize what a A$$ I was to the organization, kids, parents, and fellow coaches. Bottom line is.........I was not ready.

Fast forward about 3 years later when my DD came of age to play. Knowing nothing about softball I again was just an assistant the first year. Something about those little girls and their innocent smiles was so different than my T ball experience, I had patients and took time to teach. I was hooked.

One thing that took me a while to grasp was I had to out coach the other teams to win. I...... like most young ex-players was trying to go head to head with talent ( like in college ). Well there is not much "talent" with 5-6-7YO's. So it was a great learning experience for me, all the strategies I had been taught for 20 years and I had filed in the back of my mind.........I finally used them.

Long story short.......I haven't seen many successful 20 something head coaches.......if any. I think you need that asst experience to see and deal with more than the game on the field. We have a 25 YO head coach at the school up the road, he gets along with the players great..........but from the sound of things he has no clue how to actually "coach". He spends more time trying to fit in and be popular......like he is still in HS.

 

[CycloneSoftball22]

I guess I am a little confused now, because you stated earlier that one of the contributing factors why your DD is on the JV team and not Varsity was due to her resistant to change as told to you by her coach. If you, as a parent, are having this conversation at all with the coach, that is not a good sign. If she is clearly one of the best players in MS than there must be other factors in place that are keeping your DD from playing VarsityI still stand by my suggestion to have your DD make the most of the situation and absolutley do not confront this coach, it will only make the situation worse. Remember, your distain and disapproval for this coach has a direct influence on your DDs behavior to this coach as well. Appreciate the fact that your DD is playing for her school and enjoys the game. That should be enough in MS.

Why is it not a good sign that I had this conversation with the coach ?I pretty much just wanted to know what was going on with my DD. If there was a problem with attitude or something , I wanted to know. If that were the reason she wasnt going to make the team , I could deal with that. Middle school ball may not be important to any of the posters on this site ( or even their DD's) , but it is important to my DD. She knows that she is one of the best 12 players out there , but has a hard time understanding why she was kept off the Varsity team. She loves softball , but she knows that not many schools in our area have JV teams and the ones that do are usually more like really bad Rec ball teams (She knows this because she was on JV last year as a 6th grader). But , Like I said earlier , nothing to do for now except grin and bear it and do the best she possibly can. Then , next year , try it again.

 

[Momo'sDad]

Since most of the posters have not played, of course they think players are bad coaches.

Look, I would not coach a team in soccer, never having played it. Ever seen a female coach a football team? (I know one but she played womens football.)

Perhaps if you worked your way up by being a volunteer assitant, maybe. I understand this need when no other person is available to coach, but I would be humble and not call D1 players bad coaches as a generalization, which happens here a lot.

Again, if the coaches were paid and the programs did more outreach (and more hospitable by not calling even D1 players bad coaches), former players would coach and build up their coaching resumes. But no one wants to give one a chance.

I just looked at the baseball coaches at the local high school. I just asked a travel baseball coach, who all happened to be young and no kids yet. Did you play? All said yes. One was handed the reins 2 years out of college by the previous veteran coach, so that tells you what was thought of him. He in turn, has other young assistants.

'Humble' is the key word in all that you wrote above. I can only speak to my own experience, which is that most of the former college softball players I've observed coaching youth softball are generally good at teaching several aspects of the game, but are not good at being head coaches, which involves overall game management, player management, and parent management. One major missing ingredient is humility.

If a majority of former college softball players who wish to coach at the youth level realized there's a lot more to coaching than simply having played the game all their lives, I don't think you'd be reading nearly as many complaints about former players here as you do. A little humility would go a long way.

 

[FiveFrameSwing]

Related story …

One of my hitters attends a neighboring HS …

The HS coaches were asking my hitter to make changes to her swing on their HS team.

The dad wasn’t overly excited about his daughter being jerked around. So the dad arranged a meeting for me to meet with the HS coaches and explain the kid’s swing to them.

The HS coaches didn’t like the kid lowering her hands during her load. I explained that the hand lowering was a ‘hitch’. The HS coaches wanted the kid’s hitch removed. I explained that her hitch was a natural movement pattern that assisted with the girl’s well-timed ability to coil forward while loading her hands rearward.

Coaches then went on to say that they wanted all excess motion removed from the kid’s swing. I disagreed. The HS hitting coach’s reasoning for wanting the excess motion removed from the swing was that she was a former college softball player and that she didn’t use it. She didn’t believe there was enough time for what she considered excess body motion. I offered to supply data showing that many hitters are successful at the D1 level with what she considered excess motion. The coach didn’t want to see the data … she claimed that she didn’t need data. Not much more I could do than say that I disagreed, that I was confident with my disagreement, and comfortable with the player’s progression within the roadmap I had in mind.

A bit of a road-block … the HS hitting coach didn’t seem interested in data and wanted compliance … and I offered zero compliance.

The head HS head coach did the right thing IMO. She acknowledged that while there was a disagreement between her hitting coach and myself, that she would have the kid swing the way I had trained her. The head coach’s reasoning was that I work with the kid more frequently throughout the year and therefore it was best to not jerk the kid around.

The head coach made the correct decision IMO. They can’t work with the player’s throughout the year … and if they end up screwing up the training that kids are seeking outside of HS ball, then there will be an issue in terms of kids not seeking additional training. Let’s face it … parents aren’t going to go through the time and expense to have their kid receive additional training if the HS coaches are going to toss that training aside.

Communication helps … even when there is disagreement.

 

[crankermo]

I guess my DD and I are in a very fortunate situation. Her HS coach is one of the best in the state and is in her colleges HOF. They use RVP and tape every game swing and have the girls look over the tapes with her and the coaching staff. They asked my DD who she took lessons from and she said my dad, with a lot of help from FFS by the way. They told her swing was almost perfect and her coach even asked my DD to help her coach her 10yo daughters team with hitting. I hear so many nightmares with HS and I was worried about my DD but we couldn't be happier.

 

[Momo'sDad]

But most good coaches come from the playing ranks of the sport, so I would look there rather than outside. Someone who never played is the most likely to be a bad coach. You need the combination of playing, knowledge of the game, and communication skills. Just one alone may not do it.

Not to criticize the teachers who volunteer to do this. But coaches who have never played feel the need to tinker (to prove they are doing something, a good intention) when they should leave kids alone to play sometimes.

Not to criticize the former players who come back and volunteer to coach, but too many of them feel the need to tinker (to prove their softball knowledge is superior to an 8yo's natural abilities) when they should just leave the kids alone and let them have fun, while they themselves are learning to deal with people - kids and parents - in the real world.

 

[Momo'sDad]

I guess my DD and I are in a very fortunate situation. Her HS coach is one of the best in the state and is in her colleges HOF. They use RVP and tape every game swing and have the girls look over the tapes with her and the coaching staff. They asked my DD who she took lessons from and she said my dad, with a lot of help from FFS by the way. They told her swing was almost perfect and her coach even asked my DD to help her coach her 10yo daughters team with hitting. I hear so many nightmares with HS and I was worried about my DD but we couldn't be happier.

There are plenty of nightmares out there, but even in the not-so-great situations, most players are able to get through pretty easily, because the HS season is just a brief pit stop before the real stuff begins in summer.

 

[MsDinosaur]

I actually have spoken to the coach about this. The coach told me that there is no attitude or disrespect from my DD. Only that she is a bit "resistant" to change her swing to the way the "coach" thinks she should be swinging.

It sounds to me as though this coach doesn't appreciate how good he/she's got it. Your DD is a good hitter/fielder/thrower who is being respectful and yet she's STILL being punished because she's a bit "resistant." What the heck?

From what I've read here, I'd love to be a fly on the wall when this coach meets a girl who really does have a diva attitude and tells him what he can do with his suggestions.