The flute player

[djcarter1966]

They key words in this entire post are 8U and REC. She doesn't have to start every game at SS and play every second over girls that are always there but please treat her fairly and don't judge her based on her parent....I was that parent coach like Man in Blue and I've seen it all (sit there after practice for an hour with a girl and her father who has been watching her practice but I can't let the kid go home with him because he's the non custodial parent and we have to wait for Mom to come....and the list goes on).

Until the girls have a drivers license I don't judge, I will ask why and I will talk to the parents but I never judge the kid.

The number one goal at 8U rec is......have FUN....just focus on that then number two teach them the basics so they can play well and by playing well find it easier to achieve goal one.

 

[radness]

Not blaming/faulting a kid when they screw up and not blaming/faulting a kid when the parents screw up are two entirely different things.

Understand!!! However, the end results can be enfluenced by the outcome of these situations!

Everyone has to deal with things,
Ie: planning, communicating, participating....
otherwise we need a list of appropriate excuses!

*pattar you should include my entire post in context!

 

[_MIA_]

Everyone has to deal with things, otherwise we need a list of appropriate excuses!

7 YO shouldn't have to deal with things brought on by the people who are supposed to love them.
Forgive me, I am 240 lb bleeding heart. Nothing tears me up more than seeing little kids who have to deal
with their parent's negligence.

I have 2 kids who are in elementary school. My 4 YO has a "friend" in his pre-K class who misses school at least 2 or 3 times a week. He always asks me why his friend Elly (everybody is his "friend", classmates, teammates, etc...LOL) wasn't in school today..Talk about starting off your academic life on the wrong foot.

 

[radness]

7 YO shouldn't have to deal with things brought on by the people who are supposed to love them.
Forgive me, I am 240 lb bleeding heart. Nothing tears me up more than seeing little kids who have to deal
with their parent's negligence.

Hey...
Give us your list of excuses....
Btw....you dont know what that kid gets to do or not!!!!!
Possibly just you thinking poor little kid....when really gets to do everything....
Just sayin' EVERYONE cant have excuses or there would be no team!

 

[CloudofDust]

Thanks for a couple of voices of reason from the other side of the fence. Now that the parent has confirmed he knows about the next practice, I expect the player to attend.

Just a tad more info on what I know about this situation - this player/parent has been playing at least the two previous seasons. The former team disbanded because the head coach got fed up and formed her own select team. She took the best players from the rec team and left the rest to get disseminated across the league. I got three players, in total, from that team. That team also had to forfeit three of their eight games last season, which I imagine led to the coach's decision to leave.

The other two players I now have on my team have missed a couple of practices too, but both sets of parents have been good about communicating (again, we've exchanged hundreds of text messages already) with me and the other parents. I don't run this team like a rec team - it's much more structured and organized and run in the same way I've run TB teams in the past. The other two sets of parents have quickly realized my coaching style is quite different from past teams and they have quickly adapted.

I will learn a lot by the player's attitude, if she shows for practice this week. If she has a good attitude and shows a willingness to listen and learn, we'll be fine.

 

[_MIA_]

Hey...
Give us your list of excuses....
Btw....you dont lnow what that kid gets to do or not!!!!!
Possibly just you thinking poor little kid....when really gets to do everything....
Just sayin' EVERYONE cant have excuses or there would be no team!

My comments were more general and not really specific to this particular case...sorry I tend to do that
sometimes In this case if the kid shows up you work with her with no bias related to parent's behavior.

Edit: and to answer your question my typical excuse nowadays is either a) I am ugly or b) I am old...that typically covers most things

 

[heman1202]

We are talking about 7 year olds here right. Some of the comments makes me think we are talking about high school kids.

 

[CloudofDust]

Oh, and just to dispel the theory about the neglected kid. This isn't some inter-center, urban rec league where half the population is at the poverty line. I have parents driving Lexus', Porches and even one with a Ferrari, to practice.

I've seen situations like this in the past where the family just doesn't have a sense of team commitment. Some are even paying thousands of dollars to "play" on select clubs in various sports. Yet, the parents/kids don't really take it seriously and everyone wonders why they even bother. I hope that's not the situation here.

I'll post again after I've actually had a chance to evaluate the player.

 

[_MIA_]

Oh, and just to dispel the theory about the neglected kid. This isn't some inter-center, urban rec league where half the population is at the poverty line. I have parents driving Lexus', Porches and even one with a Ferrari, to practice.

What does money have to do with neglect?

 

[radness]

We are talking about 7 year olds here right. Some of the comments makes me think we are talking about high school kids.

I agree its little kids, that should get a chance.
However, there are also other little kids that give up other things, or dont do other things to keep their commitment. Believe it or not, even little kids can see favoritism. And dont always understand complicated reasoning.

I here it/ see it from both sides.