When to make the move?

[ms244]

My DD's current 14u team has competed in 5 tournaments (2 fall / 2 winter / 1 spring). Of the 5 tournaments we had to borrow players in 4 of the 5 tournaments. We have 10 players on our team and of that number, we have girls missing because of vacations, church, etc. We only had 7 of our 10 at yesterday's game so we borrowed 2 from a 12u team so we played all 9. Our starting pitcher got hurt in the 2nd inning of the championship game and couldn't finish the game. So instead of forfeiting, we played with 8 and lost the championship 9-1. Several factors led to the 9-1 score but the main issue is the lack of players that is on our roster.

I'm sure this question has been asked before but I thought I would throw it out there for my situation. My DD has been offered spots on a couple of teams within the last few weeks but we have turned them down at that time. We feel very strongly about keeping our word and honoring our commitment that we made to the team. The coaches have been looking for more players, but has been doing that since September! We still have 10!

For me I just want my DD to have fun, become a better player and win some games and possibly a tournament if things go right. It isn't about wins. My DD is putting in 100% and more. Two team practices a week, at least one batting lesson, one pitching lesson a week and pitch with me another 2 times each week. She really has fun with most of her schedule, but she is frustrated with the player that only attends practice once or twice a month, doesn't attend batting practice, shows up to the games unprepared and goes 1-12 at the plate with 9 strike outs. That definitely takes the FUN out of it....

So where does the 'honor our commitment' end and common sense begin? My concern is that if we sit on the fence much longer the other two spots on the other teams will be filled and we will be stuck on a team, a team that is on the verge of collapse. I feel that if we leave then the team will dissolve which only makes things worse being labeled as the reason why the team fell apart, when all along we have only had 10 players, borrowing player for almost every tournament, etc.

 

[Bucketrider]

IMO, 14U is not about "fun". This is where you hone your skills in preparation for HS and hopefully college. Otherwise this is just one heck of an expensive hobby which could probably pay for a few years of college. If this is for fun and you want a $2 trophy, stay put because the other team may be getting ready for exposure tournaments. There goals may not be the same, figure out you dd's goals and THEN find a team with like goals.

 

[chinamigarden]

If its not fun it might not end up honing any skills for any future team. If your dd is not enjoying the game, who is she playing it for? Any parent who pays for travel ball with the idea that what they pay will come back to them in scholarship money is dreaming. Does it happen for some, sure. but people win the lottery too but you wouldn't count on it for your future. Too many variables can come into play, including your own child's changing ideas or goals.

My nephew played high level soccer, traveled the country playing in the highest level tourneys with the top team from our state. They won the State cup 3 years in a row and in all three years he won the keeper (goalie) of the tourney award. Final year in HS, all State first team in the largest division. Team was State Runner Up. The boy literally carried this team in the final 3 rounds. Quit soccer as soon as that last HS game was complete. He didn't want to play, his folks pretty much made him play the last 2 seasons. But as soon as he was old enough to legally make his own decisions, he was done.

this is still a game, and the team your dd plays on has to be a good fit with your dds personality and goals. If your dds teammates do not have the same goals and drive that she does, it can be frustrating. If its frustrating enough that she is affected, I say go.

 

[Sparky Guy]

It sounds like the decision time the now. The coach has been scrambling to put a team on the field every tournament using different players every time. Sooner or later all of the players will be busy with their regular teams and your DD will not be able to play. If you're seeing this all the other parents are seeing and possibly thinking the same things you are.

What you need to do is to check out the other options available to your DD and make the move. Talk to the other parents and tell them you've not seen anything encouraging with regards to the future of the team. If they are pissed at you... Oh well... At 14U it now becomes about what is best for your DD, especially if she wants to compete at a high level. The team you describe doesn't sound like it will ever get there.

 

[sluggers]

Sparky is absolutely correct.

If its not fun it might not end up honing any skills for any future team. If your dd is not enjoying the game, who is she playing it for?

"Fun" and "joy" aren't the same thing. "Fun" implies giggling and laughing...my kids never laughed during a game of anything. They did, however, find great joy in playing sports. If a kid isn't finding joy from what she is doing, she needs to find something else.

 

[ms244]

@bucket,

Maybe I didn't word my original post in the correct order "have fun, become a better player and win some games and possibly a tournament", but if you are willing to put your DD through torture just for the possibility of a scholarship then I don't have the same mindset as you do. My daughter (along with most travel ball players) have a better chance of a scholarship with books, not bats. The player must want to go to play, not the parent dragging them to the diamond in hopes of winning a lottery.

@chinamigarden,

I totally agree with your first paragraph. They will have a must better chance of becoming better if they are enjoying themselves on the field with the other players.

@Sparky,

Your comments are spot on with how I feel right now. Scrambling to find players is where we are, and the future doesn't look any better. To make matters worse we are running with one catcher right now. No backups.... Watching her catch 5 games yesterday just broke my heart. She was beat!


Thanks to everyone that has commented.

 

[Bucketrider]

Ms244, I guarantee it is the DD leading us to the field, and the pc and the HC. Her desire is to play Sb in college. It may be the lottery, but it is a goal. With the costs involved in TB, I would be hard pressed to continue this as a hobby, she can play enough rec ball here for that. We've done the math and understand with all the money spent we could darn near pay for Duke!

 

[JAD]

If you DD is a pitcher, and she has the heart/desire to continue pitching, I have always been an advocate of getting your DD on the best team she can be on while still being the #1 or #2 pitcher. If she moves to a new team and is the #3 or #4 how much mound time will she get? The best development tool for a pitcher is game experience, so you need to weigh that into your decision making process.

 

[dadonachair]

I would start looking last week for a place to make the move. A team like this is going to fold sooner or later. Then where will your DD be.

You and your DD are putting in the time than you should be on a team that puts in the time as well. 2 team practices, pitching lessons, batting lessons, and you sitting on a bucket catching for your DD takes a lot of time. Not to mention games. You do not do all this work because you hate to play. You deserve to be on a team that has the same goals that you guys do. Putting a competitive team on the field week in and week out. Players and parents that show up for practice. Players and parents that show up for games. Players and parents that work as hard as you guys do. If you are on a team like that than the game will become fun again. Being on a team like you described does not sound like it has been fun for a while.

It sounds to me that the other parents on the team need to step up. When you play for a TB team than you have to play for a team that has the same goals that you do. As a coach it has to be a nightmare wondering if they are going to be able to put a team on the field. Not to mention the money. If you pay to enter a tourney and than can't put a team on the field than it is a waste of money.

 

[PA SB Dad]

It seems 14u has too many teams, at least in our area, and some consolidation is in order. Disgruntled players have already made their moves so it pretty clear that the poster's team will not find anymore players if it mirrors my area where many teams are still looking. (One reason not to start with too small a roster.) I know an A team who picked up some C players out of desperation, hoping the A pitching will carry them over needing defense.

Completely agree that there are too many 14U teams. If you look at the number of 14U teams registered in USSSA in our region (PA/NJ/DE), there are substantially more 14U teams than any other age group (especially 14UB). I think part of it has to do with parents who think their kids have outgrown rec, and want to start their own team so that their kid can be the star player. I have no other explanation for why there are so many bad coaches in 14UB TB than any other division.