What is your DD's ''journey"?

[Clint]

Softball has helped DD truly come out of her shell. I remember the shy quiet girl who wouldn't talk to adults with a voice much louder than a whisper. I couldn't believe she wanted to pitch as she avoided any spotlight or anything that caused people to focus on her. Now she wants the ball, she wants to to be put in during the high pressure situations. She actively seeks out conversations with other coaches and anyone who can help her achieve her goals. At college camps she makes sure all the coaches know her, and although she is definitely not the most athletic she works her tail off and is recognized for it.

She is in the middle of her journey, and I'm just thankful she lets me come along for the ride.

 

[YOCOACH]

DD's SB journey has been long and arduous for her. Partly, it was because of me, partly it was physical and partly it was due to a very traumatic personal experience/tragedy that happened when she was 15 which to this day still affects her with anxiety attacks at the worst times. I was always harder on her than her teammates. Not necessarily expecting perfection but definitely expected more from her than the other girls the same age. I knew from the first day she set foot on the field at the age of 5 that this was going to be "her" sport. She just loved the game and being on the field.

DD was always big/tall for age. She was slow as far as foot speed goes (it didn't help that she was diagnosed with exercise induced asthma) but she worked her tail off at fielding, catching, throwing and especially hitting. She made up for her lack of speed by smacking the snot out of the ball. When things didn't go well during a game for her, she took it personally and not knowing how to help her emotionally, I got frustrated which came out in all sorts of negative ways. Luckily, I had DW to reign me in. Without my wife there to constantly tell me when I needed to back off, I don't know if DD would have made it this far. Now, I'm much better at helping my DD get through these types of situations no matter if it's SB related or due to other reasons. So, it's been a journey and learning experience for me as well.

Through the years, DD started pitching, stopped pitching, became a catcher, took pitching back up to help out our TB team this year while still being our starting catcher, is going overseas next Winter to play with a Cup team against 5 other country's Olympic teams and moving on to play in college. She has turned into a fierce competitor, a self confident young lady and through it all, remains a very caring and loving individual that constantly gets emotionally hurt because of it. Through all of the bullying because of her height or being better than the others at a game due to her work ethic, A severe lower back injury that to this day still gives her occasional bouts of Sciatica, Asthma attacks, Anxiety attacks, self-doubt during times of crises and emotional hurt, she perseveres and keeps plowing forward. I think that if anything, this SB journey has taught our entire family not to just roll over and quit; to keep moving forward and when a problem arises, fix what you can and pray that everything works out for the best in the end.

 

[diamond14]

My journey for DD is to allow her to find the reward of working hard for a goal, understanding that failure can clarify the path to success(perhaps in an altogether different venue), that no matter how hard you work someone is always going to be better (eventually - and that is OK). Most things have come easy to DD especially academics and my fear is as she progresses to HS then Univ, she will realize there are LOTS of talented people and they may be as naturally gifted as you. While she is a good athlete I dont think she is blessed with elite talent. BUT, so much can be accomplished with diligence, perserverance, and determination and those qualities can be applied every day in life.
What my DDs journey is? She is a quiet kid so I will let it unfold for her as she goes and it will reveal itself.

 

[sbmom19]

My DD's journey in the last few years is to find the joy again. DD is an intense player - she is there to work her butt off, be successful and win. It is just the way she is wired - her drive is incredible. But that comes with downfalls. When she was 12 I had a coach tell me that all of the girls on the team were afraid of her because she was so focused and that she should have more fun. She had lots of friends off of the field but not many on the team - mostly because she felt like she was there to do a job and she knew the sacrifices that she and the whole family made so that she could be there. Then you add in the pressures of the recruiting process and that focus/drive intensifies. All of this is her - DH and I have told her over and over again that she has to want to play - it isn't about us - and if she didn't want to that was okay.

DD is now a committed senior that is one of only 3 seniors and 1 of only 4 returning varsity players on her HS team. The coaching staff and players look to her to be a leader and she likes that. She also plays on a travel team that she loves - both the coaches and the players. I can see her relaxing a bit and enjoying the game and the relationships she has. She is finding the joy in the game again in this journey that started when she was just 3 and a half years old.

 

[catchermama]

Great post! DD's journey began in rec ball and her natural athletic ability became obvious fairly quickly. After a few years of rec ball, she moved to travel and played on "B" level teams. She was one of the best players at that level. This year she moved to a more competitive team (at my urging :/) and this is where the journey has gotten interesting. I assumed being on a better team would, by default, make her better or at least want to be better. I was WRONG!! Better competition is not what motivates her at all. She worked hard on her last team because she felt like they needed her and she doesn't feel that way on her new team. She is struggling badly with confidence right now and trying to figure out what piece of the puzzle she is on this team. We are struggling with having to admit that we may have gotten it wrong, while still trying to encourage her even though we're not really convinced ourselves that she's in the right place. Softball continues to teach her and us about life and each other.

 

[Mom_Coach_Fan]

Great post! DD's journey began in rec ball and her natural athletic ability became obvious fairly quickly. After a few years of rec ball, she moved to travel and played on "B" level teams. She was one of the best players at that level. This year she moved to a more competitive team (at my urging :/) and this is where the journey has gotten interesting. I assumed being on a better team would, by default, make her better or at least want to be better. I was WRONG!! Better competition is not what motivates her at all. She worked hard on her last team because she felt like they needed her and she doesn't feel that way on her new team. She is struggling badly with confidence right now and trying to figure out what piece of the puzzle she is on this team. We are struggling with having to admit that we may have gotten it wrong, while still trying to encourage her even though we're not really convinced ourselves that she's in the right place. Softball continues to teach her and us about life and each other.

There is so much of this I can relate to in this post and your DD's journey. I fear she may be reaching the end. She is committed to her TB team and HS next year....I suggested there is no need to make any more decisions now.

 

[#7sDad]

First, thanks CB! What a great thread to have as we head into spring. Some of the stories people are sharing are truly inspirational.

For my DD, what started out as mostly social has built into something more over the years. She still loves making friends on new teams and at camps. But she's now become a driven, confident young lady. She works harder each year and that's now transferring into how she approaches her school work. She doesn't come by A's easily, but she throws herself into it and set her goals high.

I think her journey will always be a balance between making friends and competing against herself, regardless of what level she reaches. We'll be in the car this afternoon heading to tourney for the weekend; I'll ask her 'what's her journey?" Should be an interesting conversation... if I can extract her earbuds from her head.

 

[chinamigarden]

I don't know quite how to answer this. I can brag on my dd for days, but to actually be introspective about the "journey". My dd is 19 now, sophomore in college, she plays on the Club Team, she is taking electrical engineering. Its been tough for her, and by tough I mean she has had to learn how to study and work for her grades. She has gotten a few Bs in college which were the first of her life.

I think softball allowed her to take those Bs and see them for what they are. Grades she earned and worked hard for.

When she was young she didn't handle not being perfect well. A small brag here, she was 10 and pitched a 6 inning no hitter with 18Ks. And lost 2-1. On the way home she was so mad that she didn't hit better to help her team. We talked about it recently and she doesn't remember recording every out in a game via strikeouts. Because she didn't care that she excelled when she had this other aspect of the game that she didn't excel at that day. She once told me when she was 8 after a tie game in soccer that its worse because neither team won so both lost.

But as we all know softball can be a humbling game, she learned to get out of her own head and pitch the next pitch and stop thinking about the last one. She learned that sometimes you do your job and the other kid does hers better. She learned that 2-4 is a good day hitting.

She is still competitive and still texts us to tell us she was 19 points above the class average on a test. In the past she would have been more focused on how many points below 100 she was. But I do believe that softball taught her how to handle the adversity of not being the best every single minute. She learned to pick herself up and do it again. And I think she is happier person for that.

 

[Slappinandstealin]

For us, our daughter was a standout at Tee Ball and Baseball, even made double plays with another little boy whose dad was a BB coach when she was 6-she had been to about 1000 of her brothers' games by then and she knew all the rules. Anyway, we thought we would have her stick with baseball because the level of play was higher-and then we ran against the dads who put the only girl in the outfield or batted her last despite her superior ability. We could see that unless my husband was the coach, she would always have to fight for recognition-so we switched her to softball at 8 age, and she played as a standout. She's being recruited for college softball now, and its' been alto of fun-stressful at times, but overall a wonderful experience.

 

[Shelbylynn]

There is so much of this I can relate to in this post and your DD's journey. I fear she may be reaching the end. She is committed to her TB team and HS next year....I suggested there is no need to make any more decisions now.

This is me too.

DD's journey is rec ball from 8-12, then got on a poorly skilled travel ball team as we are in an area where soccer and lacrosse rule. She was fortunate to make it onto a good travel team with a great coach although she was really behind in skills. She's worked and learned a lot in the last two years, and is a freshman on her varsity team (again, softball is not a headliner sport). She started her journey as a pitcher and pitched through 14U, but switched to catcher where she enjoys contributing to the pitcher. She's not loud or outgoing nor does she have a rocket for an arm, so her time at catcher may be limited. She *is* hardworking on the field, coachable, focused, professional, and a great teammate. When she started her journey, her dream of course was to pitch for Alabama. Reality sunk in when she saw how hard she'd need to work, and her goal of playing in college is no longer. Now, I'm just grateful for whatever kind of playing she wants to do, if it's just high school and no TB, so be it. It was a real lesson for me to realize this is her journey, not mine, and how lucky I am to be along for the ride. (A mom can still dream though, right?!)

I love this post. Especially YOCOACH's tale - thank you for sharing!