Telling the coach to take a hike...or burning bridges?

[livingontheroad]

Elite teams hold tryouts every year
Take the best 13 ish players
Every one i know
If people want to spend time and $ on elite ball.....your doing them a disservice if they dont.


My dd, played baseball until 12, on 13yo boys team. She pitched and SS. Umpire took me aside, gave me a coachs number to call, said to get her into softball cuz she could get a scholarship.

I called that guy and took her to tryouts. Good competitive team.....typical daddy coaches.... They didn't take her cuz she didn't know how to play softball .

Someone else told wife to call her 14 yo coach....he said bring her to tryouts....he took her. She knew nothing about softball....but was an athlete with a great arm....and strong bat....he knew he could teach her. Im very very grateful to him....we had a blast all thru travel ball and college. Great girls, great coaches, great parents. I cant wait to have a granddaughter and do it again.

 

[radness]

Read the word competion used.
Thats part of keeping score and tracking stats...on each player and team performance.
Even within team sports there is competition. For playing time and earning a spot.

May not be everyones goal to be at the top of the competition chart...
However the top is still a goal for many.

It may be a goal to have fun for everybody...
What fun is may not be the same for everybody.

Goals have a lot to do with peoples perspectives!

 

[JumboJack]

Read the word competion used.
Thats part of keeping score and tracking stats...on each player and team performance.
Even within team sports there is competition. For playing time and earning a spot.

May not be everyones goal to be at the top of the competition chart...
However the top is still a goal for many.

It may be a goal to have fun for everybody...
What fun is may not be the same for everybody.

Goals have a lot to do with peoples perspectives!

If winning was not important then there would be no need to keep score. There would be no need for tournaments with an eventual champion. If winning is not important at the youth level then when is it important? Collage? And then that's it for most softball players.

Learning how to win and how to lose is a very important aspect of youth sports. Not everyone can be on the PGF 18U Platinum championship team or even play against that level of competition. But that does not mean that there are not plenty of other places/levels that one can play and actually compete at.

If someones DD is on a team and can't crack the starting/bracket play lineup there is a simple fix for that (having a coach that hates your kid/daddy ball situations notwithstanding) Either practice and improve or find a team where their skill set fits in.

Winning is fun. Losing is not. It's that simple. Does anyone want to see their kid stay on a team that never ever wins? Always gets run ruled? Usually teams like that are playing above their skill level.

 

[whiporee]

If winning was not important then there would be no need to keep score. There would be no need for tournaments with an eventual champion. If winning is not important at the youth level then when is it important? Collage? And then that's it for most softball players.

Learning how to win and how to lose is a very important aspect of youth sports. Not everyone can be on the PGF 18U Platinum championship team or even play against that level of competition. But that does not mean that there are not plenty of other places/levels that one can play and actually compete at.

If someones DD is on a team and can't crack the starting/bracket play lineup there is a simple fix for that (having a coach that hates your kid/daddy ball situations notwithstanding) Either practice and improve or find a team where their skill set fits in.

Winning is fun. Losing is not. It's that simple. Does anyone want to see their kid stay on a team that never ever wins? Always gets run ruled? Usually teams like that are playing above their skill level.

And I'm sure you'd feel exactly the same way if your daughter was the one on the bench each and every Sunday. it's easy to talk about winning when your kid is one of the starters. But organizations take money from the other 4-6 families on the roster, too. And usually the definition of better is in the eye of the coach and the usual starters' parents. So then you hit them with the "practice harder" or "become undeniable" or "move on to a better fit for your skill level" without acknowledging that these teams are also communities. These girls are peers and friends (or at least they should be). A whole lot of teams still have parent coaches, or assistant coaches, or team moms (or dads) or any number of political entanglements that make them much less the meritocracy as starters' parents make them out to be.

And before I'm accused of sour grapes, my daughter is the no. 1 pitcher for her team and she usually bats fourth. She gets all the playing time she can handle. So I'm not trying to argue from present experience, but from our own past, and seeing the faces or other kids who don't always get to play. Winning is fun, but winning and not being a real part of it isn't. And my guess is if you asked most girls, they'd rather play and lose than sit and win.

Winning is and should be important to the girls. Improvement should be and is important to the girls. It should be less important to the coaches than development and improvement, and it should not be important to the organization at all. And I would hope that for parents, what's important is the girls improve, develop confidence and the character to respond to a failure or enjoy a victory. But winning? God, I would hope it's not important to them at all.

 

[JumboJack]

And I'm sure you'd feel exactly the same way if your daughter was the one on the bench each and every Sunday. it's easy to talk about winning when your kid is one of the starters. But organizations take money from the other 4-6 families on the roster, too. And usually the definition of better is in the eye of the coach and the usual starters' parents. So then you hit them with the "practice harder" or "become undeniable" or "move on to a better fit for your skill level" without acknowledging that these teams are also communities. These girls are peers and friends (or at least they should be). A whole lot of teams still have parent coaches, or assistant coaches, or team moms (or dads) or any number of political entanglements that make them much less the meritocracy as starters' parents make them out to be.

And before I'm accused of sour grapes, my daughter is the no. 1 pitcher for her team and she usually bats fourth. She gets all the playing time she can handle. So I'm not trying to argue from present experience, but from our own past, and seeing the faces or other kids who don't always get to play. Winning is fun, but winning and not being a real part of it isn't. And my guess is if you asked most girls, they'd rather play and lose than sit and win.

Winning is and should be important to the girls. Improvement should be and is important to the girls. It should be less important to the coaches than development and improvement, and it should not be important to the organization at all. And I would hope that for parents, what's important is the girls improve, develop confidence and the character to respond to a failure or enjoy a victory. But winning? God, I would hope it's not important to them at all.

You’re right. Everyone should play the same amount and everyone gets a trophy.
SMH.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

 

[radness]

Seems like its good there is a mixture of choices

 

[whiporee]

Yeah, those other girls just suck and should be happy to just be on the team with their clearly and demonstrably inferior skills.

Even though the team signed them and took their money.

 

[JumboJack]

Yeah, those other girls just suck and should be happy to just be on the team with their clearly and demonstrably inferior skills.

Even though the team signed them and took their money.

Maybe, just maybe in those cases they could find a team that is a better fit skill wise. Like I mentioned, not everyone will get to play at the top level on top teams.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

 

[radness]

And I'm sure you'd feel exactly the same way if your daughter was the one on the bench each and every Sunday. it's easy to talk about winning when your kid is one of the starters. But organizations take money from the other 4-6 families on the roster, too. And usually the definition of better is in the eye of the coach and the usual starters' parents. So then you hit them with the "practice harder" or "become undeniable" or "move on to a better fit for your skill level" without acknowledging that these teams are also communities. These girls are peers and friends (or at least they should be). A whole lot of teams still have parent coaches, or assistant coaches, or team moms (or dads) or any number of political entanglements that make them much less the meritocracy as starters' parents make them out to be.

And before I'm accused of sour grapes, my daughter is the no. 1 pitcher for her team and she usually bats fourth. She gets all the playing time she can handle. So I'm not trying to argue from present experience, but from our own past, and seeing the faces or other kids who don't always get to play. Winning is fun, but winning and not being a real part of it isn't. And my guess is if you asked most girls, they'd rather play and lose than sit and win.

Winning is and should be important to the girls. Improvement should be and is important to the girls. It should be less important to the coaches than development and improvement, and it should not be important to the organization at all. And I would hope that for parents, what's important is the girls improve, develop confidence and the character to respond to a failure or enjoy a victory. But winning? God, I would hope it's not important to them at all.

Each family has a choice to make.
Everyone deals with the same choices, however have dd's with different talents and goals.
The social aspect gets seperated by the sports goal over the social.
Some dont see the seperation.

 

[Eric F]

...if you asked most girls, they'd rather play and lose than sit and win.

If they aren't happy with what their current situation is, they should look for a situation that better fits their needs. That's one good thing about TB, you have the freedom to make a change if you don't like the team.

For some players, playing at the top level of the game, on a team that is competing to win the biggest tournaments, and battling to earn/keep their spot is fun. They thrive on playing with and against the best competition, pushing themselves to be the best they can be, rising to the expectations of their coaches, and learning how to battle through tough moments. Some take great joy in contributing to their team's victory, and carry it heavily when they lose.

Some players don't thrive in that environment.

Not every young athlete is the same. Not every team is the same. Find the right fit.