Seeing college softball differently

[GOINGDEEP]

the average college student changes their major more then once. Maybe its a good thing she is going through it now. I know we think its best to go in with the exact idea of what they want, so they can pick the right school. On the other hand we don't want them pigeon holed by their choice, with no options once they are in school. In the long run she has to be comfortable with her choice and bouncing around different ideas in her mind might be her way of testing what she wants and making sure its best. Sort of like if you were going to buy a car, you probably wouldn't buy the first one you looked at, at least not until you looked at a couple more. She is just kicking the tires right now and trying to find the one thats best.

Funny thing is I can tell everyone else's kid exactly what they need to do as far as college goes , but can't explain it to my own.

I just want her to understand how the world works, and to get into a secure field that she will always have employment. I want her to have a career she enjoys and not just a "job". Making great money and hating your job is miserable, making good money and loving your career can make a huge difference in how you feel on a daily basis.

Your post comes at a good time. I rode into work today and didn't even turn on the radio. Before I left I went into DD's bathroom and started in again on our college visits and what I "thought" she should do. She laid her brush down, turned to me and said "dad, you're not always going to be able to call my games from the dugout..............you've got to trust me and let me play".

I knew what she meant by that statement. Why do they have to grow up?

 

[Indiana]

Thank you for some great tips. DD is a freshman in HS this year and college is big on our minds; not only for softball, but for a realization that we have four short years to make sure DD has the skills, confidence and maturity she will need to leave home. The other day we were hanging around watching the middle school girls play. There was a concession stand and DH gave DD some money and asked her to get him a drink, "something without any sugar or carbination" (thinking a Gatorade Zero or some such). DD looked at him, expressionless, and said "fine, I'll get you water." All of the other dads cracked up - we will miss our daughters and these times!
GoingDeep - congrats to your nephew on Air Force - that is amazing!!!

 

[Mrek]

Not sure where your DD plays, but high school ball is NOT free where I come from! We paid $500 this season for the 'privilege' to play for our high school softball feeder team, and the season only lasts 2.5 months. Kind of makes paying $1000 for 7 months of travel ball look like a bargain!

Sorry, about that.

She went to a NJ public school.

The team had two car washes to pay for an end of year party.

Perhaps, this is the bonus we in NJ get for the highest property taxes in the country.

 

[InsidePitch]

Perhaps, this is the bonus we in NJ get for the highest property taxes in the country.

Now that I understand the bonus plan in NJ I do feel much better about paying 8x the amount of property tax my folks do in TX.

For folks outside of NJ a $250k dollar home comes with about a 7-8k tax bill every year. Yes I do wonder where it all goes.

 

[GOINGDEEP]

For folks outside of NJ a $250k dollar home comes with about a 7-8k tax bill every year. Yes I do wonder where it all goes.

Holy smokes Batman!! Here a $250k is about $1800 in taxes. $1400 county and $400 city.

My nephew got a speeding ticket while he was playing semi pro in New York a month ago. 10 miles over the limit, and it was $518. Here they just wave at you to slow down under 10mph.

What do youz guyz do up naorth with all that money???

 

[sluggers]

InsidePitch-- I don't know where in Texas your folks live, but in the DFW area, the taxes for a 250K home would be around 4K per year--less than New Jersey, but not in the 1K range.

 

[InsidePitch]

Folks live in Bryan. They don't pay a grand and I pay more than 8k. Just used the 250 as a reference.

I do plan on moving back after I have made all the money I can here or when DD plays for A&M cause I'll be in the same boat as the OP. Plus, I'll better blend in with the crowds for the Aggie softball games.

 

[BB875]

Mine goes this week to our local Juco for an official, and to a D2 the next week out of state. My DD has flipped her "major" "field of study" "career" ( whatever you want to call it ) several times in the last year. Which has become frustrating for me. ( I try not to let it show ) She is very smart, but she just doesn't have the "office" worker personality. She likes to be in charge of situations and the more
Enthralling or captivating the better.

My best friend is a paramedic and teaches at the Juco on the side. One of her good friend's mom is a Flight paramedic who flies on the "wings of life" and now studing to be a flight nurse. She has done a ride along with my friend, and went to tour the wing facility in Memphis. So for the past 2 months THAT seems to be what she wants to do.

I keep trying to remind myself this is her life and her choice of career. I guess on a good note my friend says he will help her as much as he can in the coarse, he can get her hired at his station when she gets the EMT license, she can finish her last year working and school for the paramedic license and then choose to continue toward flight PM or nurse.

I just want her to focus on one career choice so she can focus on what college offer is the best, no matter if it's from D1 to Juco. It gives me a headache sometimes.

But, it sounds like your DD is really thinking about her career which is great! Better to change her mind now than 3 years from now.

Our kids appear to be similar from what you said. Find a career which provides excitement. My DD wants to go into criminal justice. She wants to be a cop. I think its great. She's athletic and mentally tough thanks to softball. About a year ago she did a tobacco sting for a police department in a neighboring city & loved it! One of her TB teammate's parents are cops in that town and they asked her to help out. She was successful in 3 places and made about $150 for 2 nights work. She really loved everything about it!

I think its better to pick a career you actually enjoy because you are going to be stuck with it for about 40+ years. If you can get your softball skills to pay for it, that's just a bonus!

 

[BrianMonk]

But, it sounds like your DD is really thinking about her career which is great! Better to change her mind now than 3 years from now.

I'm not sure it would even be a big issue then. I didn't declare a college major until the mid-part of my sophomore year.

I really didn’t know what I wanted to do so my H.S. guidance counselor (my father), told me, don't waste your time declaring a major. You’ll likely change it anyway. I went in as a general student, took the basic core requirements, dabbled in a class or two in areas that I had interest in, then decided. I had very little if any wasted classes (or his money).

If your DD knows exactly what she wants to do, great, it may work out….it may not. But there’s no rush in declaring a major unless the university requires it for acceptance.

 

[GOINGDEEP]

I'm not sure it would even be a big issue then. I didn't declare a college major until the mid-part of my sophomore year.

I really didn’t know what I wanted to do so my H.S. guidance counselor (my father), told me, don't waste your time declaring a major. You’ll likely change it anyway. I went in as a general student, took the basic core requirements, dabbled in a class or two in areas that I had interest in, then decided. I had very little if any wasted classes (or his money).

If your DD knows exactly what she wants to do, great, it may work out….it may not. But there’s no rush in declaring a major unless the university requires it for acceptance.

Here is dad's thoughts. If she knows that's what she wants, great. If she goes to the Juco and becomes a paramedic my hat is off to her. I want her to understand being a medic is not the glamorous job we see on tv, my best friend who is one has told her 75% of calls are BS. People working the system, pill poppers trying to gain access to meds, old people who have pooped on themselves, people who use the ER as their primary healthcare provider, etc.

So if she goes to the Juco and a year or two into the program she decides, "it's not for me"? What then? Hope to transfer into a 4 year college and pretty much start all over? 6 years of schooling for a 4 year degree.

She has a good offer from a private D2 university. Do I push her to go that route and test the water, or let her go with her heart ( the way she feels now ) and invest the time into the EMT/medic program? Somebody hand me an aspirin.