Players Cleaning Gym After Loss--High School Varsity

[cmustangsfp]

What do you recommend if the issue is focus and the will to win and not actual skill?

First I dig in and find out if there is a reason for their "lack of effort/focus". In one of my tourneys, it was championship day and one of my best hitters was striking out, not running hard in the field, etc. I pulled her aside in the last inning and asked her what was wrong. She told me that her dad and mom had told her right before the game that they were divorcing. Whoa. "Hey, I am here for you if you need to talk." was all I could get out. Other times it was "I had a bad day" or "I messed up in XXXXX", etc. very rarely have I ever found a girl that just didn't want to win. My talk with them involves that (unless it is life changing event) letting whatever has their focus take their focus off of the game at hand is not helping either situation. If they let that external thing have their focus now, it won't change the outcome of that external situation one bit, but it does affect their current situation a lot. If they want to talk about that external situation AFTER the game, we can set aside time to do that AFTER the game. Let the team have your focus now. I have had some situations that I did not handle correctly early in my coaching career and I have learned from them. One time I had a pitcher that started great and then completely fell apart after the second inning. No amount of talking could do anything to get her out of the slump. I tried everything I could think of, including trying to let her work through it, and then pulled her. What sent her south? She overheard one of her teammates say to a friend on the opposing team who had made it to 2nd base "I like my team but we're not very good". After that she fell apart. I thought it was "lack of focus". Had I chose to run her it would not have helped the situation. I just found out too late what the "real" reason for the apparent lack of focus/effort was, it was a letdown by one of her teammates. I let my frustration show towards her and vowed I would not let it happen again. Now I find out the true reason for the problem before I attempt any correction.

There are times however i wish i could make the parents run. "We had a sleepover last night and let them stay up till 12 or 1. Sorry they are so groggy this morning!" "Since we had the later game we let them go to the pool to play around for a few hours before our first game!" "We forgot her bat/glove/facemask/cleats, do you have any she could borrow?".
Mom and dad, take a few laps.....................

 

[cmustangsfp]

Now that is not to say i don't use discipline, especially for my DD's. Don't do your schoolwork? Send your friends a quick text telling them they won't be getting anymore texts from you for at least a week. I only let you do that so they won't think you are being rude by not responding. Having a lovely fight with your sister? Let me hold that ipod for a while, you won't be needing it. etc, etc.

They already have to pick up the dog poop, so no threat there....

 

[joeman39]

No texting or no ipod as discipline????? Discipline is taking electronics from them??? lol lol funny world these days

 

[cmustangsfp]

No texting or no ipod as discipline????? Discipline is taking electronics from them??? lol lol funny world these days

You hit what is important to them.

 

[joeman39]

That's what is funny... that electronics is important these days.... Oh I understand what is important to them (3 girls 23,21 and 16 and 1 boy 11) I just kind of chuckled when I saw no texting and ipod as discipline. Not meaning anything to you cmustang just as in general.

 

[cmustangsfp]

That's what is funny... that electronics is important these days.... Oh I understand what is important to them (3 girls 23,21 and 16 and 1 boy 11) I just kind of chuckled when I saw no texting and ipod as discipline. Not meaning anything to you cmustang just as in general.

It is amazing how they feel like they can't get along without them, ain't it?

 

[BaldNBeautiful]

There are times however i wish i could make the parents run. "We had a sleepover last night and let them stay up till 12 or 1. Sorry they are so groggy this morning!" "Since we had the later game we let them go to the pool to play around for a few hours before our first game!" "We forgot her bat/glove/facemask/cleats, do you have any she could borrow?".
Mom and dad, take a few laps.....................

Knew a school coach (MS) that swore to me that his policy for parents picking up kids late (10 minutes or more) was for the player to run extra laps or suicides after practice the next day. He coached a long time and this was near the end of his career.

 

[cuzmail]

No texting or no ipod as discipline????? Discipline is taking electronics from them??? lol lol funny world these days

Discipline only works if you get their attention by taking them out of their comfort zone. Exatcly what that means is different for each kid. You can't give a viable punishment sending a kid to their room if their room is where they are comfortable being.

DD had a coach once that disciplined the team by mandating push ups. That was no punishment for my DD at all. She likes them and can do a bunch. Now, take away or ban her from her latest obsession and you have something. Her secret was not to let the coach know it wasn't a punishment to her!

 

[ConorMacleod]

Well, it is Halloween, but the forum is starting to feel like Dawn of the Dead with so many old threads being brought back to life.

I agree with ConorMacleod and cmustangsfp, except that I do think much can be learned from cleaning the gym. But that should be a lesson, not a punishment.

I'm a government worker not being paid. I have a lot of time to review ALL of the posts! I just finished up over 500 posts on the rules side of things. Look out Umpires! LOL.