Meeting potential TB head coach for the first time

[quandofloo]

I am sure there have been threads about this, but my search fu has failed me so I am starting a new one.

My DD is a 2004 so she will be moving up to 12U in USSSA next year. I have been actively looking to make the jump to travel ball since the rec season ended and have been talking to a few people while we are playing through the all star tournaments. Those will probably wrap up this weekend since I doubt that our team will qualify for the State tournament so it is getting close to time to get serious. I have one coach in particular that is moving up from 10U with a few kids that I have emailed with several times that wants me to come out to a tournament to watch them play next weekend and has asked me to bring my DD to one of their team practices before he gets tryouts started. He wants to see my DD play early because it is likely that I would be an AC on the team since I have been coaching for several years and if everything worked out that would allow me to be involved in the tryout process. This would help my DD out too since she is not quite ready for me to hand her off to someone completely yet but it starts the process of her getting used to a different head coach.

My question is, what should I be asking when I meet up with a potential head coach for a new travel ball organization? We have discussed our coaching philosophy some over email and the main reason that I suggested our first meeting be at a tournament was so that I could see what he is really like during the heat of competition with the kids. I am still new to the concept of travel softball though, so I really don't know what pitfalls I need to try to avoid. Any help would be greatly appreciated.

My DW has also suggested talking to our all star HC about starting a team up, so I floated that idea but I am more inclined to go with a team that has a little bit of a base already built and work from there.

 

[InsidePitch]

This would help my DD out too since she is not quite ready for me to hand her off to someone completely yet

What does this mean?

 

[quandofloo]

I have coached her in every sport that she has played since she was 6. She suffers from separation anxiety issues that we are working through and some of that manifests itself in not wanting to have daddy give up on coaching her. My DW and I have discussed it and have figured that the best strategy is to try to phase out my involvement now so that when she gets to 14U and Middle School I can step away and she will be comfortable having other coaches for her team while we just work together on her swing and whatever side work she wants to do.

 

[abbygale]

"Hey honey, mom is going to take you to practice" is probably the best thing to be saying.

 

[InsidePitch]

Got it. If you start a team you probably won't phase out.

I'd go and watch a practice and a game or two. See if it seems like a good fit for your DD. You want to know about practices, the schedule, rotating players and not pigeon holing them so early. Are they there to win at all costs or better to balance playing time so each kid gets reps. Anything that you think would cause you angst you want to know about.

Don't feel like you are committing DD to the next 6 years with this team. It takes a lot of the stress out of picking one.

 

[Little Angels Softball]

Your "coaching philosophies" need to be somewhat similar but not identical. Remember, even though you'll be joining as an AC, the head coach makes all the decisions and will be the only one who gets flack if things go south.

I'd go watch an entire tournament and look for some of these things:

I'd be looking to see if the coach is a scream/yell sort of guy and if he is demonstrable in his displeasure with a girl when she makes a mistake. All are not good (IMHO) at the younger ages.

I also look for coaches who make corrections but in a way that doesn't have the girl tearing up on the bench after the encounter. There is a distinct difference between playing all out because you love the game vs. being afraid to make a mistake.

I look for coaches who are open with their parents. Having parents included in post-game meetings is a positive in my book.

Look at body language of the girls who are not playing. Are they bummed out and looking like they've given up or are they engaged in the game and cheering their teammates on?

See if the coach uses the same pitcher in all of the games. If so, find out if others are injured (or maybe absent) or just not getting any circle time. A coach who throws one 10-year-old for five or six games would not get my money.

Watch very closely for a girl who makes an error during an inning and be sure to watch her when she returns to the dugout after the inning is over. Is she cringing? Is she afraid to go near the coach? Or, is she OK and not particularly worried and seemingly fine with whatever the coach tells her?

How does he react when one of his girls strikes out? Does the girl return to the dugout with an ominous look on her face or does she sprint back to high fives and slaps on the rump from her teammates?

Do the girls run the bases with almost reckless abandon? That is what you want to see at 10U.

Does he scream, "Get the ball to the pitcher!" when the other team is running the bases with reckless abandon, or does his defense try to get them out? You want a coach who is teaching girls how to stop the running rather than just throwing the ball to the pitcher.

Do the parents in the stands support the girls no matter what, or do they complain or mock a girl when she does something wrong? Parents are just as big a part of the team as the girls and the coaching staff!

And, most important of all: Are the girls genuinely happy while playing the game?

There are tons more things I think about but I'm getting tired of typing. These should get you started and get you to thinking about other things, as well.

 

[quandofloo]

While I appreciate the concern, her separation anxiety is actually a symptom of a serious condition that she inherited from me. We are treating that both medically and behaviorally and the absolute worst thing you can do for someone dealing with a severe separation anxiety is to completely separate from them suddenly. Unless you are trying to force them into a panic attack.

 

[canyonjoe]

Remember you are trying out as much as DD is If you've already let it be known you would like to be an AC, remember that you aren't one and don't act like
one. When talking positions be honest about where she plays but make it clear that she'll play anywhere. At that age you need to play in order to develop. 10 to 12 is
a huge jump.

Going to a practice is a great thing to watch. I wouldn't expect the other players to invite her to a birthday party after a practice, but if a few are friendly that's a
good sign. Look at the practice and see if they are working on useful skills. If they just line them all up as SS and hit grounders for an hour it's a red flag.

At the tourney if you go, keep notes on how much each kid plays. If a couple sit all 3 games on Saturday you have an issue to look at. I like coaches who communicate with
the players not yell. See if base coaches are paying attention and letting the kids know how many outs,etc. Ideally you will see one blowout one way or the other to see how the coaches react. I would subtly talk to other parents if you can just to see how they like the team.

Finally prepare you DD for how good these kids might seem without scaring her. I remember after my DD's first practice she was a little shocked by how hard the TB players threw and how hard they could hit the ball.

Finally, make sure she really wants to do this. It's a huge time and money commitment. It's worth it if she is willing to put the time in.