Looking for some advice on HS ball because this dad is driving the struggle bus (Sorry another HS topic)

[Shiloh]

So my daughter is a sophomore and played on varsity last year. She is a pitcher who plays 1st and some OF. Last year she got a bit of time at those positions but being a freshman she didn't get a lot of field time. What she did do quite a bit was DP/Flex almost the whole year and ended the season 3rd on the team in BA (.412) and in the top 5 in RBI and OBP. This year is a new coach and assistant coach. She's been working all off season to get stronger, throw faster, improve her pitching, etc. So far this year she's seen 0 pitching time during games. She hit in 1 game and was 1-3 with an RBI and hasn't been up again. At practice she throws BP and because they're resting the starter she doesn't get to hit at practice. She comes home almost every day after practice ready to break down because the coaches do not let her practice positions in the field or at pitcher. I urged her to speak to the coach about it and let him know she wants to do whatever is necessary to play more. She has twice now, but he doesn't give her much of an answer but told her that she MIGHT pitch next week if the starter is tired.

Thus far I've stayed out of it because she's a HS player and should advocate for herself but I can see how much this is killing her. Last night, for the first time every, she came home and said "Dad, I hate playing softball, I don't know if I want to play anymore". I asked why and she said that at practice the coaches put the 9 starters on the field and had the other players sit off to the side while they ran through situations. They didn't rotate at all. I think she's going to quit in the next week and I'm not sure I will try and talk her out of it or stop her. Looking for any help or advice that anyone has.

Have DD talk to him one more time. Tell him she’s going to leave if she’s not going to play.

Then walk if he doesn’t play her. But leave on good terms because he might be there next year.

Summer season is only a few weeks away.

 

[flash277]

Have DD talk to him one more time. Tell him she’s going to leave if she’s not going to play.

Then walk if he doesn’t play her. But leave on good terms because he might be there next year.

Summer season is only a few weeks away.

Huh, don't do this, if your DD quits, she'll never play for the team again. No coach would let her play next year no matter how good she is. Id tell my DD just to accept she's not going to play much or at all this year, keep the next two years in mind, so she doesn't get her hopes up. H S season is short, this will be over before you know it.

 

[JayW]

Huh, don't do this, if your DD quits, she'll never play for the team again. No coach would let her play next year no matter how good she is. Id tell my DD just to accept she's not going to play much or at all this year, keep the next two years in mind, so she doesn't get her hopes up. H S season is short, this will be over before you know it.

ultimatum and good terms are mutually exclusive

 

[heman1202]

ultimatum and good terms are mutually exclusive

As would be quitting and good terms I would think.

That being said I do not hate the idea of an honest conversation where she explicitly states her feelings of the situation, including her dwindling desire to play ball. As a coach I most certainly do not believe in player ultimatums but at the same time I do not think a player should just accept a crap situation without an honest discussion.

I know your daughter told you she spoke with the coach but did she really speak with him (as in did the coach truly understand what she was asking)?

Is the starting pitcher a senior? Are there any pitchers (good pitching) coming up behind your daughter? Would your daughter quitting leave the future of pitching for varsity in a bind?

These are some things she may want to consider.

 

[soonerfan1966]

You could tell her to self promote. Every time she strikes out the better hitters make sure she reminds the coach she just struck her out. Have her to keep reminding the coach that she can also hit pretty good too. Sooner or later the coach will get pissed off at her and say something then you as a parent can get involved and play mediator. Cause unless the coach gets to know your daughter and her abilities it will not get better.

 

[JayW]

another thing with hs i notice is that some teams have 16-18 players and many girls never play.

 

[_MIA_]

I have seen this too, is it too generous to call it a ‘strategy’??

My Soph year we had a Senior who pitched at least 75% of the innings...and he did that the year before when I was on JV. I liked it since I played SS when he pitched and 2B when he didn't. Anyway he ended up getting drafted out of college but blew out his arm in the minors..go figure.

 

[Frost033]

It's unusual for pitchers to throw batting practice for many different reasons. Is she throwing strikes going full speed or is she throwing front toss behind a net? Is it a game simulation where she is trying to strike them out? Does she do this every day?

I suppose I would describe their BP as a game situation BP since one of the coaches calls her pitches the whole time. She's never been told to "just throw strikes" so they can hit it or anything. She's definitely never behind a screen either. As far as "every day", outside has been limited but she has thrown this type of BP several times this year.

 

[Micohiba]

With a foolish coach or a bad team, the questions become, what value can I bring and what value am I getting from my time? If she isn't contributing as a player (pitching BP hardly qualifies) and isn't developing her skills in practice, then what is she doing there? A very bad coach can do real damage. A practice for a developing pitcher that requires her to throw balls hitters use to groove their swing? That's the opposite of what she should be doing. Practice makes permanent. I would encourage her to not play HS. She might not recover.

 

[Frost033]

Is the starting pitcher a senior? Are there any pitchers (good pitching) coming up behind your daughter? Would your daughter quitting leave the future of pitching for varsity in a bind?

These are some things she may want to consider.

The other pitcher is a Junior now so one more year. Also, I didn't add it, but I suppose I should, the assistant coach is her dad so I don't foresee any pitching time changing next year when she's a senior either. There is really nothing behind her. The JV pitchers are terrible and not even pitchers if we're being honest and to my knowledge there aren't any 8th graders moving up who can pitch.

Honestly, the mental health of my daughter matters more than what the varsity situation will be if she quits. I'm trying to stay positive with her, but it's becoming increasingly more difficult when she comes home in such a funk EVERY night.