It Finally Happened...

[CPSBDad]

I found this funny, from second year coach and former UofA pitcher - Taryne Mowatt
"Coaching this years team is going to make me age at least 10 years this season! #grayhair #wrinkles #goinginsane #youngteam"

I saw that too. Cracked me up.

 

[ThatDad]

We have been fortunate to not have this level of parental drama on any of my DD teams, knock on wood, but there are a couple of good players we have 'cut' in the past because we knew the parents would be a problem. Unless one of her kids is a 65 MPH flame thrower, do yourself a favor and "cut bait" now! At least have a talk with the mother, put her on "double secret" probation, and tell her that is her one and only warning.....

Is it just me, but I have never really had the 65 mile an hour flamethrowers parents be a problem. It's always been more the mediocre kids, usualy lacking a little in the motivation department. I have coached both youth football and softball in a small town, but I am curious what others have experienced.

 

[shockcoach]

Good for you. Hopefully the mom will realize her actions caused this, but from what you said in your original post, it's doubtful.

 

[Wheels]

Is it just me, but I have never really had the 65 mile an hour flamethrowers parents be a problem. It's always been more the mediocre kids, usualy lacking a little in the motivation department. I have coached both youth football and softball in a small town, but I am curious what others have experienced.

Really? Unfortunately I have seen both parents and their DD to be drama queen divas on several occasions (not necessarily on our team). Amazing how some coaches tolerate such behavior for the sake of 'winning'.

 

[CoogansBluff]

Is it just me, but I have never really had the 65 mile an hour flamethrowers parents be a problem. It's always been more the mediocre kids, usualy lacking a little in the motivation department. I have coached both youth football and softball in a small town, but I am curious what others have experienced.

From my experience, I wouldn't say problem parents are more common among the mediocre players. I've definitely seen problem parents of star players.

It might be that the mediocre player's parents are more likely to have complaints about batting order, position, playing time, etc., since their children are apt to be batting lower and playing less. Also, coaches are more likely to tolerate or overlook the foibles of parents of their stars, perhaps unconsciously.

 

[MandM]

you managed the situation in the best way- especially with a parent who already had created issues for you. Someone with this type of personality will not change, nor will they see the error of their ways. This will be like "Groundhog Day"for these poor girls- conflict destined to repeat itself over and over.

My only suggestion might be, if you have not done so already, I would send an email to the remaining parents, simply clarifying the issue that created the problem and to be open to any questions about the principles by which you are managing the team - you certainly have been painted as a bad guy to the other parents that she spoke to- and they should know that you gave her every reasonable opportunity to back down - but that she could not control her behavior - (I am sure that those parents who have sat next to her during games saw this coming-as it is usually pretty easy to spot the crazies- but it will be reassuring to the others who did not know her- and none of the parents should have to rely on hearsay to be clear about what happened).

 

[mtnbama]

Is it just me, but I have never really had the 65 mile an hour flamethrowers parents be a problem. It's always been more the mediocre kids, usualy lacking a little in the motivation department. I have coached both youth football and softball in a small town, but I am curious what others have experienced.

My sense is that the lesser players are generally the most time consuming parents/players. Maybe it comes down to this -- most parents think their kids are great -- but some of them are wrong.

 

[mad hornet]

Played indoor scrimmages at a local JUCO this weekend. In between games one of the parents approached me about playing time and why her DD's (yes she has 2 kids on the team), sat the beginning of the first game (each girl played 3 of the 6 innings), and why one was supposed to sit to start the next. Then she started complaining about other things like her daughter losing her glove and how it was my fault, and that I lied about playing time and that our two pickups in the winter would not affect the girls who have been with the team since early fall.

So I proceed to reminder her that 1- her girls were both in the lineup (batted all 11 for the games), and that her girls did get playing time the first game, and would get playing time the second. To which she says, "that isn't good enough". 2- She accused my DD of stealing her older DD's glove at our last practice (my DD has the same style glove), so I had the girls all bring their gloves out to make sure no one had grabbed the wrong glove, and no one had it. 3- she starts yelling she wants sponsorship money back that she acquired because our team banner was never made. So I had to remind her that her sponsorship money paid for her kids fall ball and that they were all told the banner would be ready by the spring tournamnets because we didn't want to have a seperate banner for spring and fall. 4- I kept telling her that this isn't the time or place for this conversation and she kept going on, didn't even give me a chance to remind her she signed a parent contract which includes a 24 hour policy for complaints, issues or anything team related. 5- that the girls had to earn starting positions and that the 2 new girls had yet to play on the field with our team and we wanted to see what they could do as a part of the unit. So then she starts getting even more flip with me. So I put my foot down, told her to take her 2 DDs and leave. That it wasn't that I didn't want the girls but that they needed to go.

She creates a huge scene, even pulling my one assistant aside pleading her case to him hoping he would say that I was wrong and they could stay. So this parent spends all of that evening messaging my AC, and messaging parents on my team trying to get them to side with her and trying to get girls on my team to leave because of what happened. My AC calls me and tells me whats going on and asks me again what happend. So the AC calls her and tells her he had no say at all what happens and that he backs me 100% and that she needs to call me. So she calls me and when she didn't like what I had to say she goes off again. She begged me not to let her girls go that this could be worked out and I told her again, its not the girls, its the parent. That I could not let a parent dictate the team like this and I could not have a parent verbally assault me in the middle of games, and that if I let them back it would set a bad precident.

So my roster goes from 11 to 9, but I already have a few leads on some players. Just needed to vent about the whole thing. I'm not one to remove girls from a team but, the parent presented such an issue that I had to. I really feel bad for the players in this situation.

Dear God you are far more patient than me. The funny thing is those parents she was texting are probably glad to be rid of her.