Parents don't have to like a coach. But they do have to trust him/her.
Do parents have to like the coach?
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- Feb 3, 2011
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Thanks so much for all the feedback and the well wishes. I've garnered a lot of information and little tips from this forum, because one of my life philosophies is that there's no need for me to repeat other people's mistakes if I don't have to.
Jacketsfan - It's a similar situation here as our league was light on interest for coaching 8u and 10u. We had 60 girls registered, but only 3 sets of coaches for 10u. Player agent asked whether I'd do it and I told her I'd assist, then thought about it overnight and agreed to take a team. At that point, I had less than 48 hours to get ready for player evaluations. I did not actually get an assistant until this past Saturday, but could not be more grateful for her arrival. She played in this league as well as for the local HS and ASA programs and is bringing to us her running mate who was a catcher, also in HS and ASA. The opportunity to get quality instruction for the catcher position is a real advantage for our girls.
We're talking about possibly doing carryover teams starting next year, so I wouldn't mind keeping this group of girls at all, as I am committed to coaching for 3 seasons. Assuming she's still playing, once it's time for my DD to move to 12u, we'll re-evaluate things at that time.
While I value this opportunity to coach my daughter, one of things that's agreed on by many is that several of the strongest leagues out there are the ones who have a higher percentage of adult volunteers who don't have kids in the league. So, if I'm still coaching 10u in 10 years from now, that'll be the reason why.
Chinami - I like that and I hope they will all allow me to earn their trust. They've got to trust that, no matter what their daughter's goals - as well as their own - are for the season, our staff is going to do everything possible to help them reach them. Whether Jane wants to be an all-star or simply wants to get a base hit off the league's ace pitcher, we're going to do whatever we can to help her succeed. All-star balloting can be tough, but if a girl puts in the work and produces, then I'm going to go to bat for her (no pun intended).
Obbay - Excellent point about siblings and friends. I'll add that to my list of things to mention. Again, if it's not clearly spelled out, I can't hold them accountable.
Jacketsfan - It's a similar situation here as our league was light on interest for coaching 8u and 10u. We had 60 girls registered, but only 3 sets of coaches for 10u. Player agent asked whether I'd do it and I told her I'd assist, then thought about it overnight and agreed to take a team. At that point, I had less than 48 hours to get ready for player evaluations. I did not actually get an assistant until this past Saturday, but could not be more grateful for her arrival. She played in this league as well as for the local HS and ASA programs and is bringing to us her running mate who was a catcher, also in HS and ASA. The opportunity to get quality instruction for the catcher position is a real advantage for our girls.
We're talking about possibly doing carryover teams starting next year, so I wouldn't mind keeping this group of girls at all, as I am committed to coaching for 3 seasons. Assuming she's still playing, once it's time for my DD to move to 12u, we'll re-evaluate things at that time.
While I value this opportunity to coach my daughter, one of things that's agreed on by many is that several of the strongest leagues out there are the ones who have a higher percentage of adult volunteers who don't have kids in the league. So, if I'm still coaching 10u in 10 years from now, that'll be the reason why.
Chinami - I like that and I hope they will all allow me to earn their trust. They've got to trust that, no matter what their daughter's goals - as well as their own - are for the season, our staff is going to do everything possible to help them reach them. Whether Jane wants to be an all-star or simply wants to get a base hit off the league's ace pitcher, we're going to do whatever we can to help her succeed. All-star balloting can be tough, but if a girl puts in the work and produces, then I'm going to go to bat for her (no pun intended).
Obbay - Excellent point about siblings and friends. I'll add that to my list of things to mention. Again, if it's not clearly spelled out, I can't hold them accountable.
- Jul 9, 2010
- 289
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That catching thing is huge. I would work on pick plays at 3rd and first all season, and other coaches would laugh as we threw the ball into the OF, etc. At the end of season championship tourney, every team I had ever had was doing it, and picking off runners. Other coaches would steam, but we erased a lot of runs. And, it was great fun to watch it work.
One other advice - I treated every regular season game as a practice in uniforms against other teams. I really ddin't care if we won a single regular season game. We worked on bunts, developing players (especially pitchers and catchers), fundamentals, stealing, and a few trick plays. I also moved players all over the place, and changed the batting order all the time. At times, the 5 weakest batters (usually first time players) would be the first 5 in the lineup. I did that so that they could over their fears, and be ready to stand in later in the year.
When it would get to be closer to the end of the year, I'd settle in a little more. The only games that I actually wanted to win were the Championship tourney games. A lot of other coaches would use 2 pitchers all season, where I'd try to 3-4 going. At the end of the year, that matters with max innings, rest days, etc. Some other teams would laugh as they won all their regular season games, but couldn't advance out of their pools at the Championship tourney because of the pitching rules.
I would explain to parents what I was doing, and my thoughts on regular season games. It caused a little friction here and there, but it was usually fine. Some games, I would hold runners to not steal on passed balls, etc, so as to get more batters to the plate. Again, there'd be some whining in the stands sometimes, but I'd have to remind people - the mission was to develop players, not necessarily to win regular season games.
One last thing - get genuinely excited for kids when they do something they didn't think they could do, no matter how small. One year, I had a player who hadn't made contact with a ball all year at the plate - not even a foul. She was always disappointed, and I was always trying to keep her spirits up. Late in the season, she fouled off a pitch. I called timeout, brought down her the line a little, got down on a knee, gave her a hug, and told her how proud I was, because I always knew she could do it. That smile from under that facemask I'll never forget. Again, the other team's coaches thought I was nuts, but I couldn't care less. That girl came back to play in our LL season after season, and she was always smiling.
Those are the things that make LL worth doing, IMHO.
One other advice - I treated every regular season game as a practice in uniforms against other teams. I really ddin't care if we won a single regular season game. We worked on bunts, developing players (especially pitchers and catchers), fundamentals, stealing, and a few trick plays. I also moved players all over the place, and changed the batting order all the time. At times, the 5 weakest batters (usually first time players) would be the first 5 in the lineup. I did that so that they could over their fears, and be ready to stand in later in the year.
When it would get to be closer to the end of the year, I'd settle in a little more. The only games that I actually wanted to win were the Championship tourney games. A lot of other coaches would use 2 pitchers all season, where I'd try to 3-4 going. At the end of the year, that matters with max innings, rest days, etc. Some other teams would laugh as they won all their regular season games, but couldn't advance out of their pools at the Championship tourney because of the pitching rules.
I would explain to parents what I was doing, and my thoughts on regular season games. It caused a little friction here and there, but it was usually fine. Some games, I would hold runners to not steal on passed balls, etc, so as to get more batters to the plate. Again, there'd be some whining in the stands sometimes, but I'd have to remind people - the mission was to develop players, not necessarily to win regular season games.
One last thing - get genuinely excited for kids when they do something they didn't think they could do, no matter how small. One year, I had a player who hadn't made contact with a ball all year at the plate - not even a foul. She was always disappointed, and I was always trying to keep her spirits up. Late in the season, she fouled off a pitch. I called timeout, brought down her the line a little, got down on a knee, gave her a hug, and told her how proud I was, because I always knew she could do it. That smile from under that facemask I'll never forget. Again, the other team's coaches thought I was nuts, but I couldn't care less. That girl came back to play in our LL season after season, and she was always smiling.
Those are the things that make LL worth doing, IMHO.
As a parent, what I think of a coach means absolutely nothing. I've had two DD's play softball. In all of those years we've experienced all kinds of coaches. Nice guys that didn't understand the game in depth. Egotistical coaches that were really stuck on themselves but knew what they were doing. Terrible coaches that just chased kids away from playing. And wonderful coaches that challenged and improved my kids skills.
I think it may be more important for the girls to like the coach. I was told that once "the difference coaching between boys and girls is boys have to play well to feel well and girls have to feel well to play well.". This seems to be more true than false in my experience. But I usually follow the lead from my kid now that she's older.
Right now my DD is struggling with her HS coach because the coach is disrespectful and demeaning. The talented players are walking away from the program and my DD is considering it still with tryouts starting Monday. The sole reason being the coach.
All-in-all as a parent, what I think doesn't matter a whole bunch.
I think it may be more important for the girls to like the coach. I was told that once "the difference coaching between boys and girls is boys have to play well to feel well and girls have to feel well to play well.". This seems to be more true than false in my experience. But I usually follow the lead from my kid now that she's older.
Right now my DD is struggling with her HS coach because the coach is disrespectful and demeaning. The talented players are walking away from the program and my DD is considering it still with tryouts starting Monday. The sole reason being the coach.
All-in-all as a parent, what I think doesn't matter a whole bunch.
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