Confused, annoyed, you name it!

[dropballpop]

DD has been playing the past year at the 10u (now 12U) for a very good comp team. Comp season ended this summer but the girls were kept together to play a rec season, basically for practice for the upcoming spring season. DD has worked very hard to become a good pitcher on the team, but the comp season showed her languishing as the #3. Given that, the rest of her game needs improvement. Her coaches have clearly indicated that she has the God-given physical tools that make most people salivate; however, the mental portion of the game seems to kick her in the pants frequently. Coach has indicated to me that she has spent so much time concentrating on pitching, which is her passion, that the rest of her game (situational stuff) has clearly suffered. DD plays sporadically in the infield and being #3 she clearly doesn't pitch as much as she would like. A perfect example: playing right field she missed a ball--no biggie. A short time later she missed another--still working on the drop step. The kicker is once she picked up the ball she froze like she didn't know where to throw it while baserunners are roaming unchecked. That drove the coach insane. I can see it from his point of view, but it pains me to watch her get he butt chewed over and over again.

Coach has told me that some kids "get the game" at different points (ages), but I hate watching her make such fundamental mistakes. What can I do? She loves to pitch, but DD has little value to this particular team when she is not on the mound. I am paying big bucks for this too and sitting the bench stinks! I have considered moving her to a team with lower standards and I have actually had her practice with some teams. Problem is, she is pretty advanced for those teams. Every week she tells me "Dad, I can't wait for this weekend because I get to play softball." The drive home on Sunday then finds her in tears and with myself at a loss. I cannot do this for her. DD says she wants to get better and asks me to help by practicing with her. Coach has offered to sit down with her and us parents to go over his expectations.

Despite her issues in the field at other positions she is clearly emerging as a top level pitcher and has really improved her fielding skills at that positions. Her batting can be off the charts as well. The coach is clearly at a loss. I am sure that he wishes she struggled everywhere so that he could cut her, but just when you think she has hit rock bottom she does something amazing at the plate or on the mound. Is it DD, the team, the coach, the Dad or what? What do I do to help her? I cannot watch this much longer....

 

[InsidePitch]

Maybe start with this video titled "Where's the play"?
Get it here --> Youth baseball practice drill, baseball tips and drills, and pitching drills

Perhaps millions of little leaguers learned game situations from this video. As for your DD, don't fret too much, most girls get this aspect of the game by 11. It is something you need to work with her on. For DD, while fielding balls I'd call a scenario, hit the ball and have DD respond according to the scenario.

 

[PAcoach]

My daughter played her 1st year 10U when she was 9. Her second year was our 1st year 12U. She was clearly behind others for several reasons. , she was a year younger then most on the team and they physically were bigger, faster stronger. By our 2nd year 12U, she had caught up to the others in strengh and size. Because she had worked hard and others thought they could get by on their size and talent, she surpased many and became a leader on the team. Today, she still plays up and is succesful on a very talented TB team. Some of her teammates from her original 10U are struggling and some don't even play.

At this point, i wouldn't get excited. Kids mature at different times. If she continues to work hard, good things will come her way. By your post, it sounds like she has passion for and loves the game. Continue offering her support. When coming home from practice and games, focus on the positives of the day. If she had a bad day, she already knows it, so you don't have to tell her, that will only make it worse. When she starts to go negative in the conversation, quickly turn that that convo around. Get her to see the positives.

 

[starsnuffer]

Sounds like my daughter at 10. She's afraid to fail, which is why she's freezing up. Her drive is based on her fear, not her desire to perform. You need to figure out how to change that, every girl is different. Freezing in OF and not getting the ball to wherever the cutoff is screaming at her to throw it isn't lack of knowledge.

Sounds like she's learning and getting better on this team, which is what you want. What you need to be wary of is the "broken horse" syndrome. Are other players on the team motivated from love of the game, or fear or failure?

-W

 

[sluggers]

A quick dose of reality:

The question for high level travel teams is always, "How do I keep the #3 pitcher on the team?" If a team is lucky, the #3 pitcher is a good position player. If the team is not so lucky, then the situation develops like with your DD.

They want to keep your DD around, because their #1 or #2 might get hurt, and then they need her. Up until that time, if they want to win tournaments, they have to keep your DD on the bench.

The coaches real goal is to keep you and your DD from complaining. At this point, they are blaming your DD for their failure to teach. (I've coached teams from 8U up to 18U, rec and travel, for god knows how many teams, and my players have dropped many, many fly balls. But, I have never, ever had an outfielder who didn't know what to do with the ball. It ain't that complicated. Clearly, your DD has not been well coached.)

Her coaches have clearly indicated that she has the God-given physical tools that make most people salivate

"God given physical tools", for sports, mean speed, strength or superior eye-hand coordination. Given that your DD is the #3 pitcher and can't seem to be able to get playing time as a position player, this statement is pretty much nonsense. The reason your DD isn't playing is because she isn't as good as the other players.

Softball is to be played, not to be watched. For a 10YOA girl to be sitting the bench is silly. Either she should find a team where she can play, or she should find a different sport.

-->Just to clarify, girls should be on a team where they have to work for playing time. But, not every girl has enough talent to play on every team that exists no matter how much she works. A parent has to help the child determine a good fit for the child. <--

 

[Amy in AZ.]

I think I see a coaching defect. The ball was hit to RF and she didn't know where to throw the ball. Before the pitch, the OF should have been told where the throw was going.

Also, she is now afraid to play the game, because a grown man is going to chew her out.

Now, if she has been told "in the air,we are going 2. On the ground, we are going 3" and her cut off is out there yelling for the ball, and she freezes. I would look at something else being wrong.

How many fly balls a day are you hitting her? How many throws a day is she making to 2nd base? I would guess she needs about 25 fly balls 5 days a week at her age. Then, you set a trash can at 2nd base and have her throw to it.

How is her overhand throw? Is her elbow up or is she pushing the ball?

She can practice pop flies at home just by throwing the ball up in the air to herself.

Make your practice time with her fun.

I give my 11 YO students (and below) a calendar that they color in when they have practiced. They turn it in at the end of the month and they win a cheap prize. You would think that I was giving away bicycles.

Good luck and keep asking questions.

 

[sru]

I agree with Sluggers....find another team or back off on the pitching and work on the rest of her game. You are spending all of her time and your money on her pitching, which is good enough for #3 (on this team anyway). I've seen some players and parents spend far to much time working on their pitching, the rest of skills required to be a useful player get pushed aside. It has happened with a few girls that have pitched on my DD teams. The way I look at it, I want my DD to excel at two positions minimum, and be a strong hitter. This gives her more options as she gets older and the competion for spots gets stronger. Versatility is a good thing.

 

[SoftSocDad]

As the father of a little rock star , I agree with almost everything Sluggers has said. He's talked to more coaches than I'll ever meet, I'm sure, but I do know a good plenty coaches who buy into the concept that raw physical skills can potentially be molded to create a better player than one who's less gifted, yet more technically sound from jump street. At tryouts, if there's one girl topping out at 38mph who can paint corners and another topping out at 52 yet is all over the place because she hasn't learned proper footwork, a whole lot of coaches are going to take a chance on the harder-throwing girl.

And for each coach, what they're willing to tolerate in terms of lack of polish is age-dependent. If a 6-year-old throws to 1st (behind the runner) from RF, that's no big deal at all. Outfield hits usually go for 2 bases at this age. But by the time she's 8, I want her throwing the ball to 2nd, and by age 10, I expect her to be able to hold the batter to a single.

My daughter is younger than yours, but one piece of advice I've gotten from everyone in the know is that girls at that age absolutely have to be on the field to get better. The other posters have said that, so I'm just parroting the advice you've already been given...and adding a little passion of my own, because it's something I believe so much in.

There are those parents and even many girls who put winning (being on a competitive winning team) above player development and for 8u-12u, I could not disagree more with that philosophy. Yes, winning is fun, even when you're not a star player, but if young girls are going to be in the sport, then it's important to have them in the game. We each have different priorities, I get that, but I don't see the point of playing or doing anything without making an effort to improve.

I don't know what the softball options in your area are, but get her into the game. If there's a better-than-rec option where she can be the #1 pitcher, take her there if you're not committed to the current team through next summer. She'll have to learn to field her position.

Lastly, get the coach to try her out behind the plate. Catcher is a thinker's position, and will force her to learn more about situational play, because she's going to see everything.

As I said, my daughter's younger than yours, so take my words for what they're worth, but regardless of what your (Dad's and daughter's) long-term softball goals are, by all means, get her onto the field even if it means playing with a slightly less-talented team than she's on currently.

 

[PAcoach]

How much work does she get at practice in other positions, Like right field?

 

[fastpitch]

I guess you need to be realistic with what you want your daughter to get out of softball. If she just wants to play and doesn't desire to compete at the higher levels then get her off that team and put her in one that she can play at. If she does want to compete at a higher level then she needs to learn to compete for a spot. Do you think she will really reach her potential playing with girls that aren't as good or better than her? I don't think so.

Candrea on Competeing vs. Playing

I'm more of the mindset if the girl truly loves the sport and wants it bad enough... especially at the younger ages... with the right support she can get there. At a certain age... genetics kick in and some are just more gifted than others. IME hard work and dedication will get her to be able to play at the higher level if that is what she really desires.