No, but you honestly have no idea what it's like to experience that. There is nothing a man can go through that is even comparable to what a woman goes through at that time. I'm an adult and there are still days I can spend on the verge of tears at work and there is nothing I can do to stop it. I can only sit there and do my best not to actually cry. And I've been dealing with this for nearly 20 years. So a young girl who is experiencing this fairly new, might not be able to handle it.
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No, but you honestly have no idea what it's like to experience that. There is nothing a man can go through that is even comparable to what a woman goes through at that time. I'm an adult and there are still days I can spend on the verge of tears at work and there is nothing I can do to stop it. I can only sit there and do my best not to actually cry. And I've been dealing with this for nearly 20 years. So a young girl who is experiencing this fairly new, might not be able to handle it.
- Jun 9, 2010
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my 8u had the samething 1st 3 game's she played in ,on the 3rd game , i asked why she was cring she said i got out on the way to 1st. i told but look you just drove in 1 run on that play. she stop and said i did. yep .i told next time just hit just a little harder and get or make to 1st. thats all you got to do.and never saw here cry agian until she took a line drivr to the rib's(but still got girl out at 1st.)and when they took 1st. at end of the season.but the coach on her team put it out there that he would tolarate type of emotional break downs.he said for the first ime players once or twice he would let it go but after that he was going to sit them down for a inning or two .
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Greenmonsters
Wannabe Duck Boat Owner
I hear you loud and clear and am glad that I'll never have to go through that experience, childbirth, or menopause! And because it can be a such a struggle to cope physically and emotionally, why risk compounding it by putting a young player in a more stressfully situation where her chances of being successful and not letting herself and/or her teammates down are diminished considerably because she's crying uncontrollably? Give her a chance to regroup and try to get back in the game.
- Nov 29, 2009
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After raising two daughters I have that one covered. When I'm working with 12's, during the initial team meeting I have a mom help out there. Most of them are starting to be made aware at school about physical changes that will be taking place with their bodies through structured educational classes. I know my daughters both went through them at around that time. What I do is have the mom explain to the girls if they are having issues that need attention or help from a mother to let me know. I have the mom explain to them that I understand what's happening and will not be shocked or embarrassed about it. We give them a code phrase to use to make it easier. In the years I've been coaching I've had three girls come up to me. I quietly tell them find their mom or another mom to help them and never say another word about it. It's been working well and the kids know a very personal issue will be dealt with without being embarrassed.
I came up with this when my daughters were playing 12U. While at a tournament one of the girls first cycle started. She was almost in hysterics in the dugout with embarrassment. The coach had no clue and the kid had no clue how to ask for help. I made for a very stressful dugout full of tears.
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Yeah, I have tried that and the other coaches have tried that but it doesn't matter. The girl is practically like my daughter so I talk to her like I would my daughter and it doesn't matter. She still breaks down when she makes a mistake. Last night at practice she almost pitched a fit because two groundballs went between her legs. When you try to instruct her she doesn't take it very well either. I'm at wits end with this one.
Honestly, all you can do is start benching her. If she starts crying at training, she needs to be sat down. My team trained where there were logs and if you weren't following the coach's instructions, you sat on that log. We had some girls who would be on that log for most of the training.
Talking to her doesn't seem to be working, so punishment for her negative behaviour has to come in. If she doesn't play, than tough bickies. You can't have her poisoning the rest of the team with this, no matter how good a player she is.
Just keep reminding yourself you are doing her a favour in this.
Talking to her doesn't seem to be working, so punishment for her negative behaviour has to come in. If she doesn't play, than tough bickies. You can't have her poisoning the rest of the team with this, no matter how good a player she is.
Just keep reminding yourself you are doing her a favour in this.
Just of interest,are you male or female Screwball?
The point that I was trying to make is that it's NOT some minor physical thing. For a lot of girls, especially when experiencing it as teenagers, it can be terrifying and makes them act in ways that they don't understand, let alone anyone else. All I'm stating here, is that this does affect how some girls react to things. Considering we have people on here recommending kicking a nine year old (at most) off a team after she cries three times, I don't think it's unreasonable to bring up a possible reason and advise caution.
- Oct 25, 2009
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I agree with Lozza. I'm a male. Girls definitely have some tough issues compared to males.
My DD has a very high tolerance for pain. As a catcher I saw her numerous times get hit hard enough to take an average person out and still continue to play. But I saw her once sit down and cry on the gym steps after a basketball game after everyone had left. She didn't let it show in front of anyone except me. She was hurting but had played a whole game of basketball without showing it.
But the kind of crying the thread is about is a different issue. It has to be addressed; it's not good for anyone. There is a certain toughness called for in athletics. If it has to be learned it has to be learned; same as any other skill. You learn how to throw, you learn how to control your emotions.
My DD has a very high tolerance for pain. As a catcher I saw her numerous times get hit hard enough to take an average person out and still continue to play. But I saw her once sit down and cry on the gym steps after a basketball game after everyone had left. She didn't let it show in front of anyone except me. She was hurting but had played a whole game of basketball without showing it.
But the kind of crying the thread is about is a different issue. It has to be addressed; it's not good for anyone. There is a certain toughness called for in athletics. If it has to be learned it has to be learned; same as any other skill. You learn how to throw, you learn how to control your emotions.
- Jul 26, 2010
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It's not the physical aspects of menstruation that screws them up, it's all the social, emotional, and mental stuff that goes along with it.
Most studies show that female athletes actually perform better during their cycle. That isn't going to keep them from bursting out in random fits of crying though, especially when they're tweens or early teens going through it the first few times.
That said, one of my daughters coaches put it best, IMHO, "If you let "female issues" effect your ability to function in any way, you are doing a disservice to every woman who ever stood up and fought for equal rights. If you want softball players to be recognized the same way that major league baseball players are, then you have to be able to "bring it" each and every day, not just the days when you're not PMS or on your period. You can't go cry in a corner just because you're feeling emotional and then tell me that a woman should be president. Every time you do that, you're insulting every other woman that is out there that's working hard each and every day to be treated equally."
I've heard him give that speech to several 11-13 year olds after they try to get out of practice or use it as an excuse for why they couldn't do a certain thing or concentrate. I've not known any of the girls who were on the receiving end of that lecture to ever try to use it as an excuse again. To be fair, the speech included information on how to be prepared, that team moms are there to help, ect.
-W
-W
Most studies show that female athletes actually perform better during their cycle. That isn't going to keep them from bursting out in random fits of crying though, especially when they're tweens or early teens going through it the first few times.
That said, one of my daughters coaches put it best, IMHO, "If you let "female issues" effect your ability to function in any way, you are doing a disservice to every woman who ever stood up and fought for equal rights. If you want softball players to be recognized the same way that major league baseball players are, then you have to be able to "bring it" each and every day, not just the days when you're not PMS or on your period. You can't go cry in a corner just because you're feeling emotional and then tell me that a woman should be president. Every time you do that, you're insulting every other woman that is out there that's working hard each and every day to be treated equally."
I've heard him give that speech to several 11-13 year olds after they try to get out of practice or use it as an excuse for why they couldn't do a certain thing or concentrate. I've not known any of the girls who were on the receiving end of that lecture to ever try to use it as an excuse again. To be fair, the speech included information on how to be prepared, that team moms are there to help, ect.
-W
-W
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