Pitching instructor said... 10%

Rolling Hard said:

Parents need to parent 14 year olds. What a concept! The idea "it's up to her" or "its her decision" is lack of parenting. You hold the purse strings. Simply inform your DD that you are not going to pay for lessons unless she commits to throwing bullpens. Pitching is not easy and requires a 3 or 4 times a week commitment. Without that you are lighting your money on fire. There may be some exceptions but very few are going to develope into a college pitcher throwing once a week.

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What if that's not the goal? Or at least, not the priority. By 14 maybe you need to sorta have your sights there, but _under 14_? ...meh.

I'd be interested in what percentage of the girls this coach thinks aren't better at the end of their their season compared to the end of their previous season. I bet it's close to zero, if not zero.

While they may not work much/any on their own, they still practice what they learn in lessons. They still mentally absorb the lesson. They apply it when they're pitching. In the offseason it minimizes backsliding.

It might not make top flight pitchers out of 'em, but it'll do a lot to keep them improving and at least competitive. And more importantly, it'll keep them from quitting.

Not every nine and ten year old that develops a liking, even a love of, softball is going to instantly jettison every other interest and commit the majority of their effort to it, and the ones that do very well might burn out or find another interest in two years and move on.

And certainly at the 12ish area, when girls are moving from little league/rec type stuff to high school/JV type stuff...while also playing other sports, doing girl scouts, homework, band, getting interested in romance, etc.

Yes, they should find time to do more work, at least occasionally, but there are only so many hours for so many things. Plus, this is just the coaches opinion. They generally have a good sense of it, but maybe another 40% of those kids are finding 20 minutes here and there every week or every other week. Or finding 5 extra minutes after practice. Just because the kid hasn't mastered the instruction from the last lesson to this one doesn't mean they didn't/don't practice or learn.


tl:dr of this is that it's fine. There's plenty of value to professional coaching even if they don't put in much/any work outside of it for a myriad of valid reasons.

Kind of a related subject. How many elite pitchers had/have a crazy parent along for the ride. It seems it takes a lot of work for someone to take the kid to a lot of lessons and sit on a bucket for the extra work as well. No matter how bad a kid wants it they have to have someone supporting their dreams. And the opposite is true it can’t just be the parent wanting it. I would imagine the best players are motivated kids with crazy parent/parents.


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We are taking 1 hitting and 1 pitching lesson (different instructors) every week. We practice pitching multiple times per week at home in addition to the lesson, but we don't practice hitting very often (except at team winter practices). We probably should, but it's so hard to get meaningful practice time in with both.

The reason I mention this is because I agree with @CoachCeetar that even without as much at-home hitting practice, she is still absorbing and getting better at hitting with her lesson and time with her hitting instructor. She's certainly on a more rapid trajectory with pitching with the extra at-home practice, but I still think doing both are worth it.

My issue with this is when it is the cold weather months, how many people can afford to rent indoor space to work on their kid’s pitching with them - or how many even have access to such space?

When my dd was younger than 14U there weren’t many options here to rent space, and the local baseball place that had tunnels was always fully booked by teams and kids for hitting lessons.

Some also don’t have basement or garage space where they can set up tarp or net.

I’d say the PC needs to think about and understand the above. It might not be that 90% don’t want to work on it, they just might not have easy access to do so.

PJR202 said:

Mine will be 16 in March. Been pitching a few years. I hate having to be the "bad guy" and constantly be harping on making sure we get her sessions in. She understands on a surface level why I do it, but I still get the eye roll and grumpy face and "I hate softball" way too much. Last week I flat-out asked her to quit so I could stop stressing about her next season, because I was the only one concerned with it. Told her I was 100% OK with it, but once the season starts there's no quitting. Of course, she doesn't want to. She's just dramatic in the moment.

I think she finally grasps that I hate bugging her about getting her work in, but as a parent I have to save her from herself, in a sense. I told her if she didn't quit, I was "this close" to bailing and letting her learn a life lesson in the circle in March. She's a great kid, a hard worker, and loves pitching MOST of the time.

To be fair, though, she's still a kid and she's not a savage travel-playing softball monster. But we do open practices twice a week, all off-season, she has a hitting lesson once a week, then we work on pitching three times for an hour. So typically, a ball is in her hand 5-6 days a week. To her that sounds awful, but it's literally only 1-2 hours at a time and we live half a mile from the school. She has a hard time grasping how much time she spends napping or playing on her phone, or hanging with her boyfriend.

Sometimes, we just have to be the bad guy.

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It's not the bad guy, it's the good parent. If they choose to quit, that fine. Will she be joining the debate club, chess club, doing a lot of volunteer work or getting a job.

earlg3 said:

We are taking 1 hitting and 1 pitching lesson (different instructors) every week. We practice pitching multiple times per week at home in addition to the lesson, but we don't practice hitting very often (except at team winter practices). We probably should, but it's so hard to get meaningful practice time in with both.

The reason I mention this is because I agree with @CoachCeetar that even without as much at-home hitting practice, she is still absorbing and getting better at hitting with her lesson and time with her hitting instructor. She's certainly on a more rapid trajectory with pitching with the extra at-home practice, but I still think doing both are worth it.

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Ask her hitting coach what she needs to be working on. I don't know her age but unless she is a really good hitter capable of running the bases (sliding, etc.) Then she will never hit in college.

Rolling Hard said:

Ask her hitting coach what she needs to be working on. I don't know her age but unless she is a really good hitter capable of running the bases (sliding, etc.) Then she will never hit in college.

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She's 9, I think she will be okay at this pace for now. I do agree the pace should ramp up when older if her hitting isn't where it needs to be, though.

Rolling Hard said:

Simply inform your DD that you are not going to pay for lessons unless she commits to throwing bullpens. Pitching is not easy and requires a 3 or 4 times a week commitment. Without that you are lighting your money on fire. There may be some exceptions but very few are going to develope into a college pitcher throwing once a week.

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Interesting take. Can you not take lessons unless you want to pitch in college? I take golf lessons and I won't be playing in college, lol... I take lessons to simply get better. To enjoy the game more. Why can't a kid?

PJR202 said:

Mine will be 16 in March. Been pitching a few years. I hate having to be the "bad guy" and constantly be harping on making sure we get her sessions in. She understands on a surface level why I do it, but I still get the eye roll and grumpy face and "I hate softball" way too much. Last week I flat-out asked her to quit so I could stop stressing about her next season, because I was the only one concerned with it. Told her I was 100% OK with it, but once the season starts there's no quitting. Of course, she doesn't want to. She's just dramatic in the moment.

I think she finally grasps that I hate bugging her about getting her work in, but as a parent I have to save her from herself, in a sense. I told her if she didn't quit, I was "this close" to bailing and letting her learn a life lesson in the circle in March. She's a great kid, a hard worker, and loves pitching MOST of the time.

To be fair, though, she's still a kid and she's not a savage travel-playing softball monster. But we do open practices twice a week, all off-season, she has a hitting lesson once a week, then we work on pitching three times for an hour. So typically, a ball is in her hand 5-6 days a week. To her that sounds awful, but it's literally only 1-2 hours at a time and we live half a mile from the school. She has a hard time grasping how much time she spends napping or playing on her phone, or hanging with her boyfriend.

Sometimes, we just have to be the bad guy.

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Speaking from experience here so take this the right way. I think you're burning her out.

My DD usually dictates how much she practices and always works between lessons. It is up to her how good she wants to be.