The dark side of recruiting...
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That is certainly a new one. I would tell her yes! This ranks up there with convincing kids that the proper way to break in a glove is to rub it with horse dung and leave it in the sun.
- Nov 29, 2009
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Another thing happening with the early verbal situation is coaches are over-selling the verbals because there are so many kids verballing too early. The kids are changing their minds and decommitting. It's a two-way street and the coaches are always going to try and keep their options open.
2 teammates of DD had similar experiences. One signed her letter at an NAIA, then a month before she was to report to school the coach contacted her and said that he needed to take most of her money so that he could sign a pitcher. Other friend verballed to a mid major D1 the summer before her sophomore year. 10 days before she was supposed to sign the head coach announced that she was resigning to go to another university. In both cases the players ended up at a JUCO and it was worked out for them...
That's the inherent risk of verbals in general, early verbals in particular. They mean nothing. They have zero legal standing and either party can (and does) back out at any time. I have a huge problem with early verballing (and not just because my daughter was never good enough for that to ever be a consideration). How the heck does an 8th or even 9th grader know where they want to go to school or what they want to do for the rest of their lives? Yes, there are always outliers, but by and large 13 and 14 year olds have no clue beyond what mommy and daddy tell them. IMO, when you verbal at that age, you are making a decision based solely on softball, which should not be the priority. College coaches are complicit, TB coaches are complicit, parents are complicit. The NCAA can make this all go away if they choose to.
I don't know, maybe I'd feel different if any of this directly impacted my daughter. It didn't, and she is very very happy at her DIII school.
sbmom19 - I know the NAIA can be kind of like the wild west, but taking away most of the offered scholarship money after they player had already signed the agreement seems especially cold.
I don't know, maybe I'd feel different if any of this directly impacted my daughter. It didn't, and she is very very happy at her DIII school.
sbmom19 - I know the NAIA can be kind of like the wild west, but taking away most of the offered scholarship money after they player had already signed the agreement seems especially cold.
I would think a signed NAIA letter would obligate the school for at least a year.
A similar thing happened with my DD who is a senior. She was committed to a d-1 school for 2 years. Suddenly late this summer the coach was erratic about responding to texts. DD takes the initiative to call and see what is up about that. Coach admits that they are re evaluating but ''that doesn't mean we don't consider you one of our commitments but no hard feelings if you look around.'' Basically ''we may still take you but not sure the amount, but may also not take you.'' this is 3 months befoe signing day.
Long story short DD ended up decommitting. Not because she was afraid to compete or ''re-earn'' the spot but didn't like how she was treated. Didn't like the poor communiation. Thought it was disrespectful. College coach wanted to go through her travel coach instead of directly to DD. she's known DD for 2 years. Really? I'm proud that DD wasn't so needy that she put up with that. She showed more courage than the coach in calling her and being upfront with her and telling her that she was walking away. That is not easy for most teenagers to call an adult not knowing if how it will be received or whether she's making a mistake. Coach didn't have the same courage to do that with her.
DD has not shed a tear over this and has been excited about just being a regular student. She doesn't want to play softball unless a good situation just comes along, which it probably won't at this point.
What i learned about DD is that she doesn't love softball so much that she wants to play under any situation. It has to be one where the coaches and players are tight and supportive and treat each other right. That's why she plays softball. Based on her recent dealings with the coach she couldn't risk going there. It's good that softball wasn't DD's 1 and only dream or she would've played somewhere no matter what.
I really don't think this coach is a bad person. She's just young and hasn't developed the people and empathy skills that she is probably going to need to be successful. That's one thing families and players are blind about. They assume that these college coaches are great mentors and role models and will love your kids. Well some do, and some aren't evolved enough to provide that. there are some really good coaches and there are some jerks just like any other profession.
But like I say, DD is happy. She always saw softball as a sacrifice of time that could be spent exploring other parts of her life. She's excited about doing that. She's already played softball 10 years at a high level. She's looking forward to doing something else (unless this NAIA thing works out).
Long story short DD ended up decommitting. Not because she was afraid to compete or ''re-earn'' the spot but didn't like how she was treated. Didn't like the poor communiation. Thought it was disrespectful. College coach wanted to go through her travel coach instead of directly to DD. she's known DD for 2 years. Really? I'm proud that DD wasn't so needy that she put up with that. She showed more courage than the coach in calling her and being upfront with her and telling her that she was walking away. That is not easy for most teenagers to call an adult not knowing if how it will be received or whether she's making a mistake. Coach didn't have the same courage to do that with her.
DD has not shed a tear over this and has been excited about just being a regular student. She doesn't want to play softball unless a good situation just comes along, which it probably won't at this point.
What i learned about DD is that she doesn't love softball so much that she wants to play under any situation. It has to be one where the coaches and players are tight and supportive and treat each other right. That's why she plays softball. Based on her recent dealings with the coach she couldn't risk going there. It's good that softball wasn't DD's 1 and only dream or she would've played somewhere no matter what.
I really don't think this coach is a bad person. She's just young and hasn't developed the people and empathy skills that she is probably going to need to be successful. That's one thing families and players are blind about. They assume that these college coaches are great mentors and role models and will love your kids. Well some do, and some aren't evolved enough to provide that. there are some really good coaches and there are some jerks just like any other profession.
But like I say, DD is happy. She always saw softball as a sacrifice of time that could be spent exploring other parts of her life. She's excited about doing that. She's already played softball 10 years at a high level. She's looking forward to doing something else (unless this NAIA thing works out).
convincing kids that the proper way to break in a glove is to rub it with horse dung and leave it in the sun.
For my DD1, a coach might be able convince her do that before convincing her to sing.
I did not know that...learned something new today and I was hardly trying!
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